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    1. #1
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      Hi,

      I've been alcohol free for 23 days now. I'm on Campral and I think it's helping. Let me rephrase that - I know it's helping because I could never go this long on my own without relapsing. I also talked honestly with my wife about my problem and she was supportive. I felt very strong those first couple of weeks, but I've been having some doubts as of late.

      I think one of the biggest issues I face is positive association. For some reason, I associate drinking with good memories. For example, I like to collect independent and obscure films and one of my favorite past times (while alone) was to watch a movie and have a drink or two or three. I know I can't engage in these behaviors anymore and I feel like something is missing.

      My wife is going out of town again in two weeks and I already anticipate I'll relax and enjoy some time to myself. We bought a new home theater system recently so I figure I'll watch some movies, but I fear the temptation to drink like I used to is going to be great.

      I suppose I need to tell myself that having a drink is not a requisite for watching a movie. Also, my good memories rarely manifest themselves in reality - at least they didn't the last few times I tried to duplicate these experiences. When I would drink and watch a movie, most of the time I would drink too much and pass out or get sick and totally not focus on what I was watching. Not fun at all.

      Any suggestions?

    2. #2
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      I know what you mean. For me watching football, which I luv, is harder than heck to do w/o beer. But I have done it and it is doable. I find it best to think of all the BAD things alcohol does rather than the nice things. Don't forget making an ass of ourselves, pissing our pants, being rude to our spouse and with me the worst thing is having my stepson see us drunk out of our minds. Keep these bad things in mind is better than the few nice things.

    3. #3
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      Hi JS!!!

      Welcome to the 23 day AF club. I'm there too!

      I have found that "keeping busy" is the best remedy for all those false memories of how good it was to drink. When I feel like caving, I go for a run or a swim. If it's late at night, I go for a drive and listen to some music. Anything to curb those antsy feelings.

      I started L-Theanine the other day too. That is helping. I also have a list that I keep on my cellphone of why I am doing this.

      Hey we'll make our 30th day together. See you at the party on here!

      Stay strong buddy,
      --Steve

    4. #4
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      JS81, very good question. I am going to think about it, and will post again after I have come up with some ideas. I know that the idea of drinking, bringing pleasant memories of when it really DID go well, the idea of it being a relaxing, happy reward for the adult I thought I was, those are some of the things that brought me pleasure in the past, and some of the things that I really miss when I am AF. And will be the things I will continue to miss if I do go permanently AF.

      I know that watching a good movie should be an innocent way to spend an evening. I am sure you have thought about AF type drinks, about inviting someone who doesn't drink to watch the movie with you, about keeping your computer to this site while you ARE watching the movie..... If I come up with anything remotely innovative, I'll post again. Good luck. You CAN do it, you know, if you let yourself. Getting out of our own way is one of the problems, isn't it?

    5. #5
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      Haven't tried GABA. The L-Theanine is making me very mellow. Not sure I could handle anything else!

      Stay Strong,
      --Steve


      Zenstyle;630566 wrote: X-posted with you DD and Mica.

      DD, I'm thinking about getting the L-Theanine. Have you tried GABA?

    6. #6
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      JS -- L-theanine is a great supp! It's effective for those irritable, grouchy, generally dissatisfied times when others get on one's nerves. Also, here's a thought about your AL/film combo... they say that nature abhors a vacuum, so be sure to replace your AL movie-watching drink with something new and delicious -- maybe something that you only have during those times. A cocoa or caramel drink? Maybe a wonderful tea? Or my fav -- sparkling water and pineapple juice. I know it's not *the same* but it helps to fill the void. You might also do something new to associate with your film watching, for example, look up some trivia related to each film beforehand, and try to spot the actor, scene, line, etc. as you watch. I think Zen was dead on about not thinking of it as a deprivation. You CAN retrain your thoughts! Good luck and let us know how it goes.

    7. #7
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      This is a really good question. I associate drinking wine with watching my fave TV or films. Relaxing and chilling and just enjoying the moment. Next morning however, can never remember watching them or even what happened! Seems pointless but still I do it.

      Here's to day 1! Again.......

      If anyone has any ideas would love to hear them.

      xx

    8. #8
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      GREAT idea LilBit!

      How about a freshly made strawberry/banana smoothie with whipped cream?

      --Steve

    9. #9
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      Gosh that sounds yummy......

    10. #10
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      How do you dismantle positive association?

      I think it does take time to rewire your brain. I did the bare minimum cooking wise for quite a while as I had always had a glass of something on go while in the kitchen - I can cook AF now - and it usually tastes better!

      I think stick it out, distract yourself another way for a while, take the supps and you should end up being able to watch without AL.

      Bets
      x

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