Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 11
  1. #1
    Registered User. C-Developer's Avatar

    Join Date;
    25th August, 2013.
    Posts;
    190.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    Name's Jake
    So a little bit about me is probably in order, so here goes:
    I am in my 20's and from a small town in the rural midwest. I was always the nerd in high school (and still am) and never so much as touched a drink until I got to college, which consequently was located in a huge metropolis compared to my home town of 900 folks. In college I always did well as a student during the week, but I went like a banshee on the weekends. Sundays during undergrad were normally spent in a darkened dorm room in "recovery mode" from my 2 nights of partying, and then I would go on about my week as normal.

    This pattern continued with military precision for the 3 and half years I spent as an undergrad (I am a creature of habit), and then I decided it that I did not want to grow up yet so I wanted to stick around and get a masters degree in CIS (Computer Science and Information Systems). The workload of grad school made my previous regimen nearly impossible to maintain. I got drunk on rare occasions on long weekends or on breaks like Xmas, Spring Break, etc. but I pretty much kept it under control.

    Not 2 weeks after I got my additional credentials, I got offered a position about 900 miles away from my home state and town for a tech start up that seemed really on the rise. Beings that I have an astronomical amount of student loans to pay off, and how abysmal the economy is, I jumped at the chance. I loaded up my car and drove up here, and after staying in a hotel for a couple of weeks before I could find my own place, I settled in and began work at the company as a mid-level manager in charge of development.

    My problems with alcohol started again (I think) mainly out of being lonely. Being the new guy in a new town where the only people you know are co-workers sucks. I began just walking into bars near my place on fridays after work and chatting up the bartenders and getting smashed like the old days. Since I am lucky enough to have a loft right in down town where there are literally dozens of bars within walking distance, it was not long before I was the belle of the ball, at least I thought. I had been a broke college student for the last 5 and a half years, so actually having a significant income came with growing pains. I would buy rounds of shots for total strangers, wear expensive suits and neckties, buy escorts, nearly anything I could to make up for the fact that I did not, in truth, have a real friend in the world expect my old friends on facebook.

    Fast forward to about 4 weeks ago and my weekends began to spill over into my week days. I would take a couple of shots in the morning to clear the shakes, and then the following week I was so smashed out of my mind, even on sunday, that I had to call out of work on Mon and Tues claiming sickness. Now I may not have been "sick" in the traditional sense, but I can assure you that I felt worse than I have ever in my life. I could not even hold down water without hurling it back up again. Even when I showed back up to work on wed. I was far from all right, and naturally, that was the day every friggin person on the planet had a problem they needed me for. I limped through until friday, after going the previous two nights with terrible insomnia that I got virtually no sleep.

    That Sunday, I decided that I had had enough. This weekend is the first that I have been straight as an arrow since I have been here. So I have been sober for a whole 7 days now.lol Granted I spent nearly this entire weekend sitting in my apartment alone playing video games and playing on my Mac, but waking up on a saturday and actually seeing the sun without it hurting my eyes and my head hurting like somebody was hitting me with a sledgehammer was motivation enough that there is a world that exists without this "lifestyle"

    Wan't to know another thing that is odd? All those supposed "friends" of mine? Not a one of them called me all weekend since I was not down at the bars, so I guess I am back at square one of when I first rolled into town, which also means it wont be long before I am lonely again. To curb this, I found my way here, and hopefully to another soul out there who will listen to my words and perhaps see a vision of themselves, or perhaps have empathy for my situation.

    Well, that is my story, for what it is worth.

  2. #2
    Registered User. 3June2013's Avatar

    Join Date;
    13th June, 2013.
    Posts;
    1,299.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    C Developer hey there thanks for sharing your story. First off congratulations for staying AF this weekend I am sure it wasn't easy. You seem like you're very honest with yourself, that's going to help you a lot too. You are reflective, that's important. It's one thing to have the resolve to stop, it's another to understand the reasons why you drank. I commend you, it took me another 30 years of abusing myself to get to the point of really being honest with myself.

    I'm thinking you want to find some new social scenes in your town. Do you have anything like "meet up"? Here where I live it's not all about hooking up it's about like minded people hanging out. I'd also recommend getting physical. Running or walking groups, a team sport? Tennis? Anything that gets you out and means meeting people.

    Keep reading, keep posting, keep sharing. Check out the newbies nest it's a busy thread. Hope to hear more from you soon!

  3. #3
    Forum Subscriber. Mr Vervill's Avatar

    Join Date;
    26th June, 2012.
    Location;
    Ohio.
    Posts;
    1,662.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    C-D, welcome friend, you're not alone here. Hop on over to the newbie's nest. people at all stages there, you'll feel welcome after a few days. Just keep reading and posting as 3 J says. The more you post, the more you'll get back. Your honesty and openness is to be commended. Feeling alone is one of the big triggers in AL abuse. So glad you seem to be so self-aware at this point. I'm pulling for you.

  4. #4
    Registered User. Samstone's Avatar

    Join Date;
    10th January, 2013.
    Posts;
    4,131.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    C-D
    first and foremost... welcome

    I think that you done well to recognize a problem and want to deal with it before it really gets out of hand.
    There's lots of support here. At the bottom of 3June is a link to the toolbox. You'll find it very useful. Any time you get the urge, come here first and look around, read, and post. It'll keep you sober, believe it or not.

    Sam

  5. #5
    Registered User. C-Developer's Avatar

    Join Date;
    25th August, 2013.
    Posts;
    190.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    Oh, and I guess there is one more additional detail that I left out which is worth noting, and that is the very poor financial decisions I have made since moving up there. Aside from the cost of bar tabs and trips to the liquor store, I was also prone to lapses of judgement when making purchases of all kinds.

    Expensive dinners, ridiculous purchases from online retailers, the hiring of escorts, cabs for when I was too drunk to ever walk the short distance back to my home, etc. to infinity.

    I have always managed to get my bills paid, but I do not have much to show for the vast majority of the other money I have spent the last 6 months. I am ordinality very smart when it comes to financial matters, but my drunken alter-ego has other ideas on the matter.

  6. #6
    Registered User. Samstone's Avatar

    Join Date;
    10th January, 2013.
    Posts;
    4,131.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    All the more reason to stop.

  7. #7
    Registered User.

    Join Date;
    21st August, 2013.
    Posts;
    18.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    C developer- welcome! You have made a realization in your 20s that many of us have taken far longer to make! Find yourself an avenue to meet others . I agree with 3j. Get physical. Hiking, biking or if that is not your thing try volunteering or a book club. Anything to get out there ! Hang in there!

  8. #8
    Registered User.

    Join Date;
    17th June, 2013.
    Posts;
    878.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    Wow, you really told your story well. I really connected on a lot of it.

    It sounds like alcohol was your social lubricant, after so long of it not being a part of your life. I cannot begin to imagine how hard it was to transition from small town to big city.

    I understand the part of low income to high income. It is the way of the world - you spend what you have in general.

    Forgot those clingers on who did not contact you because you weren't down at the bar. Are these the sort of people you would want to hang around with if alcohol was not present?

    Well done on making it here. Alcohol can control you like you have felt. It can stop you from realising how real life feels. It sucks you in. Keep it up and make next weekend another AF one. Look for some interest groups or hobbies to meet some great people, who don't centre around AL.

  9. #9
    Registered User.

    Join Date;
    24th March, 2013.
    Posts;
    401.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    C - Welcome and congrats on the 7 days, which is huge. You have come too far to turn back now. I too had friends disappear when I made it know that I wasn't drinking anymore...but then I figured they really weren't friends to begin with...it did hurt for awhile though. You will have plenty of friends here!

  10. #10
    Registered User. Teabobaggins's Avatar

    Join Date;
    25th August, 2013.
    Posts;
    28.
    Post Thanks / Like

    I am new here, so here is my Story

    C-Developer, welcome. I don't really have any sage advice, I'm a newbie here too, but well done for the 7 days. That's a fantastic achievement.

Similar Threads

  1. My Story, or some of itů
    By FallonsMom in forum Tell Us Your Story
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: May 11th, 2010, 04:36 AM
  2. so here's my story
    By diva822 in forum Tell Us Your Story
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: April 3rd, 2009, 06:49 PM
  3. MY Story (so far).
    By Sweaty Betty in forum Tell Us Your Story
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: March 14th, 2009, 07:35 PM
  4. My Story
    By last call in forum Tell Us Your Story
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: January 26th, 2009, 03:43 PM
  5. My Story Story - For Little Girl Pants (yes you Greenie)
    By livingfree in forum Tell Us Your Story
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: February 24th, 2008, 10:41 PM

Bookmarks

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •