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Thread: Senior Citizens

  1. #1
    Registered User. MKR's Avatar

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    Senior Citizens

    (Why is everyone sending me senior citizen jokes?!!! )



    FAMILY

    Three sisters ages 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together. One night the 96
    year old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the
    other sisters, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?" The 94 year old yells
    back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see." She starts up the stairs and
    pauses. "Was I going up the stairs or down?" The 92 year old is sitting at
    the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters. She shakes her head
    and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful," as she knocked on her
    wooden table for good measure. " She then yells, "I'll come up and help both
    of you as soon as I see who's at the door."

    _______________________________________________

    "I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!"

    Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March
    day. One remarked to the other, "Windy, isn't it?" "No," the second man
    replied, "it's Thursday." And the third man chimed in, "So am I. Let's have
    a beer."

    ___________________________________________

    WHAT A CHOICE

    A little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing home. As
    she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and say, "Supersex."
    She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him,
    she said, "Supersex." He sat silently for a moment or two and finally
    answered, "I'll take the soup."
    ____________________________________________



    OLD FRIENDS

    Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they
    had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities
    had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day, they
    were playing cards when one looked at the other and said, "Now don't get mad
    at me . I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of
    your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me
    what your name is." Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she
    just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, "How soon do you need to
    know?"

    _____________________________________________



    SENIOR DRIVING

    As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.
    Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just
    heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77.
    Please be careful!" "Hell," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's
    hundreds of them!"

  2. #2
    Registered User. mojomuppet's Avatar

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    23rd August, 2006.
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    Senior Citizens

    i cant wait to ge told so i can pull some of this crap off tooo!

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