Time

[Lost Soul]

It takes time to develop an addiction to alcohol.
Time to recognise alcohol affects us differently that what we expect or wish for.
Time to realise drinking is impacting our life negatively.
Time to recognise we need to get help, reach out & it takes time to find the right support.
Time to grieve a normal healthy relationship with Al that we once hoped for.
It takes time to accept and come to terms with.

What is the cost of my alcoholism to me? Time.
The time that I have lost is a tragic loss.
I cannot turn back the clock nor would I like to.
No pity, no regrets and no shame.
I am glad for the past & what I have learned from it.
I am grateful for who it makes me today.

My challenge is not to live with alcoholism.
My dream is not a life beyond alcoholism.
It is both.
And it takes a lifetime to rise to.
And a lifetime to realise it.

[available]

Great post LS. It took forever for me to realise that time was on my side when i didnt drink. I was so impatient when i first stopped drinking, i wanted it all and i wanted it now but Rome was not built in a day and neither was my sobriety.

[Lost Soul]

Thanks Ava, I guess I feel the AF journey is lifelong. Acknowledging what I've lost to addiction & not being afraid of the past is where Im finding acceptance. Acceptance is such a powerful gift. Rather than confidence it is trust. Trust in myself & in the path that lies ahead. And that the AF journey is nothing to fear xx

[NoSugar]

LostSoul, I think you should change your name to WiseOldSoul . I know you're relatively young but you seem to understand so much about yourself and life in general. And you certainly know how to treat others. Your posts are among the most empathetic and kind ones I've read. I agree with you that becoming AF is nothing to fear - it's an opportunity and a privilege. xx, NS

[mario]

It takes time to develop an addiction to alcohol.
Time to recognise alcohol affects us differently that what we expect or wish for.
Time to realise drinking is impacting our life negatively.
Time to recognise we need to get help, reach out & it takes time to find the right support.
Time to grieve a normal healthy relationship with Al that we once hoped for.
It takes time to accept and come to terms with.

What is the cost of my alcoholism to me? Time.
The time that I have lost is a tragic loss.
I cannot turn back the clock nor would I like to.
No pity, no regrets and no shame.
I am glad for the past & what I have learned from it.
I am grateful for who it makes me today.

My challenge is not to live with alcoholism.
My dream is not a life beyond alcoholism.
It is both.
And it takes a lifetime to rise to.
And a lifetime to realise it.

Thank you Lost soul for posting this , I can relate so much.

[Lost Soul]

Thankyou NS, that is really kind of you to say x I am very fortunate to have learned from having very inspiring teachers on my journey.

I think we all have to forge our own journey and when I have been at my most vulnerable, what has helped me most has been kindness & understanding of exactly where I was, in pain & suffering, which has given me the courage to continue on my path.
I don't know if what I say or do is right, but I try to choose what I believe is right because that is all I can do. In striving for (the very limited) all I can do & knowing it is at the same time everything I can do, makes the journey itself and often times, the belief without knowledge, my greatest achievement xx

Mario, so much of your wisdom on MYO has helped me over the years & I will not forget it x

[Pavati]

Hi, Lost Soul--

I remember someone back at the beginning telling me that I wasn't a bad or weak person, I was just vulnerable to alcohol. I think that admitting that vulnerability, and allowing myself to be vulnerable here has really helped. I appreciate that in you as well.

Thanks for sharing. The sentiment resonates with me - and helps keep me focused. No more time to waste...

Pav

[Lost Soul]

Thankyou Pav,
I'm glad if you or anyone can relate if it helps in any way at all.
We can't choose what or how much time we have,
Only what we do with the time we do have xx
I've learnt so much from you the past few months being back at MYO, so I should be thanking you
Take care
LS

[Sunbeam]

The time lost to alcohol is the saddest part to me. As you said, there is nothing gained by punishing ourselves for that or any loss. Ever forward, we can still create our future.

[paulywogg]

Just found this thread,great post LS,my biggest regret is the time I lost with my kids,I had a good 10 years with the older 3 before I started drinking but after that I was there in person but my mind was somewhere else soaked in beer,I'm now waking up and mourning my lost time with the kids,its something I hafta get over but its by far the hardest thing to deal with,I feel kind of alone and useless now that they're all grown up