March Mod Squad

[Stewarts]

So, I was definitely successful this weekend. I had two beers the entire weekend. I think the first one, which was after a long drive to Vermont, I didn't even finish, maybe I drank 1/2 of it and feel asleep. The second one was on Saturday after skiing. For some reason, I consider that a weekend of not drinking. I feel good physically, not sure how I feel mentally though...

j.

[Lasha]

That's Brilliant Stewarts, wish I had done that but now after 2 nights of modding I feel so much more positive/confident, bet you feel the same.

[Stewarts]

Wow, are group seems to have dissolved. That's sad. I thought I'd make a reflection of my own. Instead of being down on myself, i'm actually going to see far I'd come. I actually did drink a little last night, more than I wanted to, but nothing drastic. My problem now, is I drank way too much coffee earlier that I feel like I am having an ongoing anxiety attack...LOL... I might go for a run, then go home and relax before the Vermont drive.

I can recall a few years ago, I'd have this stints where the next day I'd feel like hell, like I wanted to die, I mean real awful. I can't recall having one of those for a really long time, so I must be doing something right...

Quite frankly, the depression unrelated has more cause for me feeling down and making bad decisions...or foolish ones I should say.

Anyway, I hope everyone is well.

j.

[Lasha]

Funny how there are more people viewing but a lot less posts these days.

This group will cease if no-one posts.

I'm fine with my modding but how are all you viewers doing?

[LibraryGirl]

Hi All. It's been a while, but I'm here. I started to say, "I'm back", but I'm just taking this one day (hour?) at a time. I thought I'd post now before I get my confidence back this afternoon and feel like it's okay to buy yet another bottle of wine to get through the night. I've gotten to the point that I am drinking a bottle a night and it's affecting me in a negative way. I have trouble getting up in the mornings and I'm tired all the time...

I was successful at quitting for over 30 days about 2 years ago with the help of this site, and I also went on to successfully moderating, but am back to drinking every day. I am not drinking as much as I did before I came here the first time, but it's getting close. Anyway, hello to those who remember me, and to all of you. I'm looking forward to getting the support I need to get back on track.

[Stewarts]

LG, I can relate. I was modding, not drinking much at all and kind of the same thing happened. I was never one to really drink every night. I don't even really keep AL in the house. I only drink when I'm out, which I guess can get expensive, some times. I only had one beer the entire weekend, and I wasn't even really into that.... it was at dinner after skiing.

I was noticing the last few times I did drink... I wanted it more than I usually do, which was kind of weird, for me at least...right now, I am not feeling that urge. Honestly, I don't feel that well...kind of anxious and a little irritable, but it has nothing to do with AL, well, because I haven't had a drink, meaning drinking multiple drinks, since Thursday... I don't plan to tonight either...

j.

P.S. Welcome back. I also found I had most success when people on the site were more active...

[ducky]

Hi LG and Stewarts. I remember reading your posts a while back LG. I am kind of in the same boat with indulging too much and always feeling tired. I have been more of a reader than a poster for a while. I did post a bit a couple of weeks back but it seemed the thread was quiet. Hoping to see more posts again!

[LibraryGirl]

Thanks, Stewart and Ducky. Stewart you're lucky that you don't have that urge all the time. I'm not drinking tonight, and I think it is precisely due to the fact that I made a decision this morning and wrote here about it. I feel good about my decision and hope I can continue to not drink when I don't feel like I should, without feeling compelled to buy alcohol. Do you know what I mean?

One day at a time...

[guapo]

Hi all.



I don't post much around here, because MWO is abstinence-based. Drinking really isn't a problem, I'm to the point now where I can take it or leave it, with no urges or cravings whatsoever.

That's great because it prevents a lot of problems, but sometimes I miss getting a little wasted, because the right amount of wasted felt pretty good.

Of course, I usually went way beyond a little wasted, and that's where the problem came in, and that's not an issue anymore, thank God.
Anyways overall it's still a lot better, other aspects of life have a lot more control also, so it's good good good.

This is a hell of a lot better than counting the days, and worrying about a relapse all the time. I hope Stewart writes something interesting, I love to read your posts

Anyways, we bought a Lakehouse, so we'll be waterskiing and living the good life at the lake. Something that never would've happened in the drinking days.

[Stewarts]

Hey Guapo, I am glad I can entertain you all, and I mean that sincerely. I was actually a creative writing major in college. I have ideas in my head, but I am scared to really get into any real project for reasons I rather not get into now; the point, in many ways this is kind of like a creative writing outlet.

Guapo, I can totally relate to what you mean by "a little wasted"....it actually is...let's admit it, nice. I even was in a situation a few months ago when some of the youngins in my office were getting high, and I said "f it, one bump or two"... trust me, that DID NOT become a habit (nor will it) and with the little controlled al I had, it was actual a nice night I do not regret at all.

I've been anxious lately, so I haven't want to drink, which is good. Like I think I said, the last drink I had was one light beer on Saturday at dinner. A few nights, over the last several weeks, I found myself drinking for careless reasons...nothing crazy, just I'd be out with some friends and then stop by somewhere before home...and I'd wake up, that was dumb and a waste of money.

Good news, I've started getting back to my normal weight, so that's nice.

Something is bothering me in my sub-conscious and I don't know what it is, so I think that is why I've been anxious lately... it's making me somewhat lethargic and melancholic.

j.