Hi! I’m here again. A small voice still looking for friends on their way out of this

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Are my old time friends still here?

Regardless, there are never a lack of people looking for the way out of addictions. I found the people I needed here when I needed them the most and maybe I’ll get lucky again.

I'm taking 80mg of baclofen. I plan to continue. I also think I’ll try going back to the rooms, thouugh that hasn’t worked in the past. It’s nice to be with people who, “get it”.

I’ll try to read up and catch up with old posts in the next couple of days. This place saved my life.

[Stevo]

Hi Ne,

I've been back for a while now, have had a little contact with a couple of people but it's generally very quiet here these days.

I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw you had posted today. I have asked about you but it was fruitless.

Welcome back, and as much as it's never for a good reason we come back here after a long hiatus I am very glad to see you here again?

Cheers Steve.

[_serenity_]

WELCOME BACK LADY! So glad you're back! You were always the best at stirring up good conversations in here.

And hello @Stevo!

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Hi Stevo! Like you, I’m sorry to see that you’re here but happy to find a friendly word. Sorry to read about your struggles with getting enough baclofen. It’s a conundrum. As is knowing when or how the “switch” is found. But I Long for it.

I'm still getting used to the format (compared to 15 y3ars ago, lol) but jolly glad (that’s Aussie for happy) to see you are doing well and approaching indifference.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Just kidding. Hug emojis rock.

We’ll see how it goes. Goodness knows that booze and communication and connection don’t always mis, but I found home, connection and contented sobriety here and hope to do so again.

[Mulburry]

I’ll try to read up and catch up with old posts in the next couple of days. This place saved my life.

MWO has been a great resource for as well even before I started posting here regularly. I did hours and hours of medication research on here, over the years. In the end, though it wasn't easy, a standard valium detox, a lot determination, and a lot of patience got me free of this demon... and I'm still going strong. That being said, I still find it interesting to see how various medications are working for people.

[terryk]

Hey Ne, nice to see you back. Sorry I never called you that time, shit has been way too crazy...

-tk

[Ne/Neva Eva]

Omg, friend. Life is what it is. Mostly crazy. Soooo nice to hear from you, regardless of when or how. Muchas.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

It’s been so damn long I don’t even know how to reply correctly.

Anyway, I just watched a comedian that many (?) people find offensive. And I do, too. Because the truth hurts, man. He calls it like it is and sometimes it’s brutal. It can also be funny.

Which is very much like facing my own reality. I’ve been in treatment twice in the last 6 months. The first for 9 days, because insurance is a pain in the ass. The most recent for the full 28 days because insurance is probably very swayed by the long arm of real money. But I digress.

It’s not my first rodeo but I learned so much at the last place that it surprised me. I still don’t buy into conventional treatment, but it turns out they don’t either! They know it sucks. They know the definition of alcoholism is relapse. But they gave me some tools, some new, most millennia old, and I could have used them today. It was a good day, could have been better. And the truth is, the truth hurts. Exercise matters. I didn’t do any.

It’s another reason I love being in the 12-step rooms. Because even though there is a lot to be desired, there’s a lot of wisdom, wit and even hilarity in a room full of drunks. A lot of bull shit and bravado, too. But like watching Chapelle, I gotta take the good with the bad. Cringe worthy for sure. Painful, absolutely. Too true too much.

I’ve been lazy and complacent (or as usual, absentminded) about my baclofen regimen despite the latest tech on my effing wrist. That stops tomorrow. I’m inspire by the old stories and by @Stevo. Indifference awaits.

[Ne/Neva Eva]

MWO has been a great resource for as well even before I started posting here regularly. I did hours and hours of medication research on here, over the years. In the end, though it wasn't easy, a standard valium detox, a lot determination, and a lot of patience got me free of this demon... and I'm still going strong. That being said, I still find it interesting to see how various medications are working for people.

I agree, Mulburry. I’ve been in two treatment centers in the last 6 months. Embarrassing but whatever. The first one, the detox was extremely heavy on benzos for 7 full days. I don’t remember the first two, and I was sober when I checked in.

The second one was a completely different protocol. Again, checked in sober but didn’t get detox meds for 30 hours. It was…unfortunate. And then only sparingly. But whatever, again. I figured I could deal with unbelievably unpleasant as long as there were people there to make sure I didn’t have a seizure or worse.

And I just wanted to be done, forever, with being dependent. It makes for a desperation that works in the short term.

Determination I have, I think. Patience, not so much.