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    Thread: 28thv..

    1. #31
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      Re: 28thv..

      Morning all...

      Still bare and dry out there but noon will see the rain start and snow by the end of work. You'd think I'd be ready wouldn't you. Lots of coffee this morning so have a brew on me. Have a good day all....PPQP

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    3. #32
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      Re: 28thv..

      mae all howare we today then? hope we are all well..Thankfully so is Bonnie,,they were runnning around yesterday ,suddenly went quiet in the dining room,and there in the corner was Bonnie chewing a sock,...she chewed a massive lump out of it....I thought oh no ...so she was on hay and water last night and I checked her about once every hour up till about 2 this morning ....result?I am nacked ....she is bouncing around pooing and eating like mad ,whilst Im walking around like a half shut knife!!at least the loony rabbit is ok..well poets day today anyone doing anything this weekend ? Julie is doing a sponsored walk for the dementia society on Sunday,one of her friends has organised it ...
      ok lets have a brew..

      hiya ppqp...Friday afternoon ...bridge time ..sod the moaners ..you just get on with the bridge ...hope the snow stays away for you ..

      hiya Lav ,hows you then today?hope all is well ...Ilove seeing stuff made out of recycled wood ,or upcycled as its called nowadays..love to see some pics ..my brother has a table made of 3inch thick pine ..hope you have a good weekend .

      aha the interview addicted disco king ...hows you then today? hope you are well my friend .hows the pesky?best of luck with the interviews mate

      hiya sk ,glad your hand is improving .I lost the really small movements in my left hand (moto something Ithink....Lav one for you !)a few years ago and had to re teach myself ..Ive got about 90%of it back ,so its worth keeping on practicing .....

      hiya everyone else ...hope you are all well...a good weekend on the cards for you all....


      why arent there any casinos in china

      because they dont like tibet

      on a 50 story construction site, a guy working at the top accidently knocked a brick off the 50th story, when looking down he saw that his boss was in line for the brick to land on his noggin and briskly yelled, "Falling Brick". The boss looked up after hearing the yell and moved to one side as the brick crashed to the ground.

      The boss looked up at the worker and yelled, "A $100 bonus for you laddy".

      Another guy working a floor below had observed what went down with the brick and decided he'd have a go for a $100 bonus, the problem was he was a bit of a stutterer, as he kicked the brick off the side of the building he looked down and yelled with a loud voice, fffffffffffffffff "FCK HE'S DEAD".


      Creative Answering Machine Messages

      Hi. Now you say something.

      Hi, I'm not home right now but my answering machine is, so you can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.

      (In a bored voice Heaven, God speaking...

      Hello, epicenter of the Universe, God speaking. If you leave your name, number, and prayer after the tone, I will call you back as soon as I can. Please note that I answer all prayers, but sometimes the answer is NO. Bless you, my child, and have a nice day.

      Hello, this is Death. I am not in right now, but if you leave your name and number, I'll be right with you.

      Greetings, you have reached the Sixth Sense Detective Agency. We know how you are and what you want, so at the sound of the tone, please hang up.

      Hello. I'm home right now but cannot find the phone. Please leave a message and I will call you up as soon as I find it.

      I can't come to the phone now because I have amnesia and I feel stupid talking to people I don't remember. I'd appreciate it if you could help me out by leaving my name and telling me something about myself. Thanks.

      I can't come to the phone right now because I'm down in the basement printing up a fresh new batch of twenty dollar bills. If you need any money, or if you just want to check out my handiwork, please leave your name, number, and how much cash you need after the tone. If you're from the Department of the Treasury, please ignore this message.

      Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.

      Hi there. This is Joe speaking. I'm home right now, and in a moment, I'll have a decision to make. Leave your name and number and I'll be thinking about it...

      Bob here. I'm home right now, I'm just screening my calls. So start talking and if you're someone I want to speak with I'll pick up the phone. Otherwise, well, what can I say?

      This is Dan Cassidy's answering machine. Please leave your name and number, and after I've doctored the tape, your message will implicate you in a federal crime and be brought to the attention of the FBI.

      You have reached the CPX-2000 Voice Blackmail System. Your voice patterns are now being digitally encoded and stored for later use. Once this is done, our computers will be able to use the sound of YOUR voice for literally thousands of illegal and immoral purposes. There is no charge for this initial consultation. However our staff of professional extortionists will contact you in the near future to further explain the benefits of our service, and to arrange for your schedule of payment. Remember to speak clearly at the sound of the tone. Thank you.

      Hello, this is David. I don't live here, so if you were trying to call me, you've dialed the wrong number. On the other hand, if you were trying to call John, Jim, or Eric, please leave your name and number at the tone. I don't guarantee that one of them will call you back -- only that I won't.

      (Deadpan voice Hi, This is Dave. Please leave a message as soon as possible and I'll get back to you at the sound of the tone.

      Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message, and then wait by your phone until I call you back.

      Hello, this is Ron. I'm not home right now, but I can take a message. Hang on a second while I get a pencil. (Open a drawer and shuffle stuff around.) OK, what would you like me to tell me?

      We're sorry. You have reached an imaginary number. Please rotate your phone 90 degrees and try again.

      You're growing tired. Your eyelids are getting heavy. You feel very sleepy now. You are gradually losing your willpower and your ability to resist suggestions. When you hear the tone you will feel helplessly compelled to leave your name, number, and a message.

      As the drugs take hold, you feel you are losing your grip on reality. You begin to hallucinate. You see a telephone... The telephone is next to an answering machine... You hear a faint click and a light flashes on the answering machine... You hear a beep...

      I don't exist at the moment, but if you leave your message, name and number, I'll call you back when I am...

      I'm only here in spirit at the moment, but if you'll leave your name and number, I will get back to you as soon as I'm here in person.

      I don't want to bore you with metaphysics, but how do you know this is an answering machine? Maybe it's a dream, or maybe it's an illusion, or maybe YOU don't really exist. One way to find out is to leave a message, and if it's reality, I will call you back.

      I'm not at home today, and I might not be home tomorrow. So please leave a message after the tone. I didn't take a shower today, and I might not take one tomorrow. So if you don't leave a message after the tone, you might have to deal with me in person.

      (Noisy pick-up of phone.) Hi, I'm a burglar and I was just about to steal Troy's answering machine. If you give me your name and number I'll... Uh, I'll post it on the fridge where he'll see it. Uh... By the way, where did you say you live?
      If you are a burglar, then we're probably at home cleaning our weapons right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't at home and it's safe to leave us a message.

      I'm writing the definitive work on pain. I would like you to tell me how this machine makes you feel. Remember, be honest. This is for posterity.

      (Loud heavy-metal music in background; raspy voice Hello, this is the executioner. Joe can't come to the phone right now because he's DEAD! Leave a name and number and IF we decide to resurrect him, he'll call you back.

      Tim's dead! And God only knows where Lisa is! Fortunately resurrections and divine revelations do tend to occur from time to time, so leave a message and we'll let you know when the next miracle occurs.

      (Drunken voice You have reached Bob's hotline. We are not able to respond due to uninevitable circumcisions. But if you leave your name and noomber, we won't be in wonder... pa-a-a-a!

      Hello, this is Marlin's answering machine reminding you that yesterday was the last day of the previous period of your life. After the beep you can tell me how it was, or leave some other, informative message. Thanks.

      I can't come to the phone now, so... Hey -- that's a nice phone you have there. Hey sugar, you call this number often? I bet you have answering machines bothering you all the time... Yes indeedy. Why don't you give me a call sometime and we can listen to some old recordings... I might even play my beep for you.

      Bridge, Kirk here.


      Steve has been captured by a flying saucer and can't come to the phone right now, but if you leave your name, phone number, and a message, I'll have him call you back as soon as he gets away. Read all about it in next week's National Enquirer.

      Hello, this is Jim. Unfortunately I can't answer the phone right now because I've just come back from the Mirror Worlds and I'm still made up of antimatter, so if I were to pick up the phone right now, the resulting energy release would make Hiroshima look like a wet firecracker. So leave a message at the tone and I'll get back to you as soon as my component particles have been restored to their normal charges.

      I'm gone.
      af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


      CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

    4. #33
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      Re: 28thv..

      Hi PPQ

      Mick, were you wearing a nurses uniform. Bless you.

      Back on the heating pad and unable to walk. I was doing so well.

      Have a good evening.
      Enlightened by MWO

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    6. #34
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      Re: 28thv..

      Good evening friends,

      The rain has arrived as scheduled, up to 2". Everything is still pretty damp around here so not sure where we're going to put it all, ha ha!

      PQ, just rain for us so I hope you don't get the bad stuff
      Be careful out there.

      Mick, I've had golden retrievers & German shepherds eats socks but never a bunny rabbit. I think I would have been worried too. Glad Bonnie is OK, geez.
      The loss of fine motor skills in your hands goes by different names ~ depending on the cause.

      SK, did you hurt your back again? I hope not, geez. Remember, moist heat works best alternated with ice. Hope you feel better soon

      Hello to Cyn, Pauly, Det & Sam!

      I think vegging out in front of the TV is in order for the rest of the evening.
      Have a good night all!

      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

    7. #35
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      Re: 28thv..

      Lav...joining you with vegging out in front of the TV. Left work with it trying to rain and snow at the same time. Not quite cold enough to form hail. LOL

      SK...you didn't fall out of bed again did you? You take it easy and heed Lav's advice.

      Sam...looking forward to hearing about getting the place ready for winter. Hope your weather is holding up.

      Det...any word on any of the interviews?

      See you all in the morning....PPQP

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    9. #36
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      Re: 28thv..

      afternoon all...how are we today then? goodI hope ...its bloomin freezsing here today ..we are in the middle of storm "Otto"I think this one is called ..a chilly wind ...blowing a hooley..even the rabbits aint impressed ..Bonfire night tonight with lotsa fireworks ...they aint gonna be impressed with that either...lets havde a bhot brew..

      hail ppqp ...get it?how are you doing ?hope all is well with you ,whats the weather like snowing yet?..have a great weekend whatever you do...

      Hiya Lav ,,that rabbit is as mad as a box of frogs.......she tried to jump over a standing pipe ,about 2 ft tall..no injuries thank good ness ..that was the phrase ...fine motor skills thats what they said..anyway how are you today then? all good I hope ..you have a good night vegged out in front of the gogglebox?I did similar with hot orange chocolate..

      hiya det ?well?????????any nooze...?

      hiya sk..how are you doing today ? you any better?I hope so..is the back ok?

      hi tree ,hope all is good for you too....

      Diarrhea?

      A simple cure is six bananas.

      Eat five and shove the other one up your butt

      This vegan says to her partner,

      "Are we having a tree for Christmas this year?"

      "Yes, " he replied, "it will probably be better than the grass we ate last year. "

      Watching Jamie Oliver cooking sea bass with lemon and parsley really inspired me to go and create a fishfinger sandwich with tomato sauce

      When you're on a plane and they say "Please remain seated whilst we do a head-count", they should also add the caveat "... And please stop shouting out random numbers or we'll be here all fcking week".

      I was at Leeds train station this afternoon and asked the guard when the next train to London was. "1800 hours," he replied.
      If British Rail think I'm waiting at a platform for 75 days, they can get fcked. It would be quicker to thumb a lift

      When I was 15, my dad showed me a 30 minute presentation on why one should always wear a condom during sex. I was confused at the time as all the slides were just pictures of me, I get it now.
      af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


      CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

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    11. #37
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      Re: 28thv..

      Evening Mick...wow, one storm after another. Snow stayed away and it was like a nice fall day today. Of course my annual appointments are scheduled for next week with dropping temperatures and rain/snow. Maybe there won't be a lot of fireworks with that weather you're having.

      Shout out to the gang....PPQP

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    13. #38
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      Re: 28thv..

      Good evening Abbers,

      Mick, you'll have to knit some bunny sweaters soon
      I'm grateful the chickens don't seem bothered by the cold because it would be a cold day in hell before I go out & put sweaters on them, ha ha!

      Last night's rain sure cooled things down, yay! Heading down to 37 degrees tonight, much better for sleeping
      Maybe I'll actually be able to sleep that extra hour tonight - that would be a miracle Ha ha!!! We had severe storm & possible tornado warnings last night. Looks like a small tornado may have touched down in the norther part of the county.

      PQ, glad you didn't get hit with snow yesterday. Life is busy enough, right?
      The squirrels are running around like crazy nuts, they must know the weather is changing. Can't keep the dumb things out of the bird feeder. My dog has been exhausting herself chasing them off the feeder & deck, LOL

      I made a really decent vegan mushroom pizza tonight, yum
      Yesterday I made a non-dairy style broccoli & cheddar soup in the Instant Pot. I'm off that restricted eating plan after a month & enjoying some more exciting meals. Still want to stay away from sugar & refined carbs as much as possible. I used white whole wheat flour for the pizza crust & it was very good.

      Hello to the missing - Det, Cyn, Sam & SK!
      I hope everyone is OK.

      Wishing everyone a good night!
      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

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    15. #39
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      Re: 28thv..

      Ahoy hoy ABeroooskies!

      oh my, down with a nasty cold but I'm keeping me chin up pretty well. even managed to clamber top of this trailer to snap a sunset pic tonight:

      Shared album - Xring007 - Google Photos

      Lav, what the heck is white whole wheat flour? most curious here...

      SK, health report? report to sickbay at once! worrying us a tad ya know?

      Mick, please tell me you got some firework pics? they are good fun, despite what the rabbits have to say on the subject.

      PPQ, interviews are going so well I'm a bit freaked out. .......really. One has offered me over 6 figures annually for an outside sales job
      I'm really damn good at but it's for the 13 western states and I'm just not sure I'm up for that anymore.....ugh... agonizing over this one.
      and another one much more local travel but 45k. hmmmm. what's a boy to do?

      so between that and not sleeping for poop thanks to this flue/whatever the heck, I'm in a bit of a spin. no rushing.......ommmm ommmmm... no rushing.

      and... that's about all the energy I have currently, more to come soon.

      be well loves
      nosce te ipsum
      (Know Thyself)

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