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    Thread: feb fird

    1. #1
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      Mick's Avatar

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      feb fird

      mae all how are we today then?as you can see never went detecting ..it was bl..dy cold Ive also just learned that they are looking at changing the laws for detecting ...you would require a government permit and everything you find belongs to the state.Really going to work that one ..
      Nipping down to Juliesdads ..the other Julie has just messaged they are all going to meet up at his house and take him out for lunch.
      Rabbits are out playing ..not quite true now ..he is playing she is in the conservatory sitting in the sun!!
      did new models last night ..fitted lighting ,counters wall backing and people in them

      20190202_223929.jpg

      20190202_223820.jpg

      20190202_223854.jpg

      what makes you think this pair are spoiled?

      download (3).jpg

      hope all well ...apologies for not individualising ,but need to get myself spruced up a bit ...no comments!!!!!!!!!!

      As my five year old son and I were headed to McDonald's one day, we passed a car accident. Usually when we see something terrible like that, we say a prayer for those who might be hurt, so I pointed and said to my son, "We should pray."

      From the back seat I heard his earnest request: "Please, God, don't let those cars block the entrance to McDonald's."

      A little girl was out with her Grandmother when they came across a couple of dogs mating on the sidewalk.

      "What are they doing, Grandma" asked the little girl?

      The grandmother was embarrased, so she said, "The dog on top has hurt his paw, and the one underneath is carrying him to the doctor".

      They're just like people, aren't they Grandma" said the little one?

      "How do you mean" asked the Grandma?

      "Offer someone a helping hand", said the little girl, "and they screw you every time"!

      Two medical students were walking along the street when they saw an old man walking with his legs spread apart. He was stiff legged and walking slowly.

      One of the students said to his friend: "I'm sure the poor old man has Petry Syndrome. Those people walk just like that".

      The other student says: "No, I don't think so. The old man surely has Zovitzki Syndrome. He walks slowly and his legs are apart just as we learned in class".

      Since they couldn't agree they decided to ask the old man. They approached him and one of the students said to him: "We're medical students and couldn't help but notice the way you walk, but we couldn't agree on the syndrome you might have. Could you tell us what it is"?

      The old man said: "I'll tell you, but first you must tell me what you two fine medical students think".

      One of the students said: "I think it's Petry Syndrome".

      The old man said: "You thought....... But you are wrong".

      Then the other student said: "I think you have Zovitzki Syndrome".

      The old man said: "You thought........ But you are wrong".

      So they asked him: "Well, old timer, what do you have"?

      The old man said: "I thought it was gas........... But I was wrong"!

      The Chief noticed a new seaman one day.... and barked at him, "Get over here!" "What is your name?" was the first thing the Chief asked the new guy.

      "Paul," the new guy replied.

      The Chief scowled, "Look, I don't know what kind of bleeding-heart, liberal pansy stuff they're teaching Sailors in boot camp today, but I don't call anyone by their first name. It breeds familiarity and that leads to a breakdown in authority. I refer to my sailors by their last name only: Smith, Jones, Baker - that's all.. I am to be referred to only as Chief. Do I make myself clear?"

      "Aye, aye, Chief!"

      "Good! Now that we got that straight, what is your last name?"

      The new guy sighed.... and said, "Darling. My name is Paul Darling, Chief!"

      "Okay.............. Paul,........ here's what I want you to do...


      A married couple went to he hospital to have their baby delivered. Upon their arrival, the doctor said he had invented a new machine that would transfer a portion of the motherís labor pain to the father.

      He asked if they were willing to try it out. They were both very much in favor of it. The doctor set the pain transfer dial to 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before.

      But as the labor progressed, the husband felt fine and asked the doctor to go ahead and bump it up a notch. The doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine.

      The doctor checked the husbandís blood pressure and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this point they decided to try for 50%.

      The husband continued to feel quite well. Since it was obviously helping out his wife considerably, the husband encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him.

      The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain.

      She and her husband were ecstatic.

      When they got home, the mailman was lying dead on their porch.

      Next time you think your hotel bill is too high you might want to consider this...

      Husband and wife are traveling by car from Key West to Boston

      After almost twenty-four hours on the road, They're too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road.

      When they check out four hours later, the desk clerk hands them a bill for $350.00..

      The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He tells the clerk although it's a nice hotel, the rooms certainly aren't worth $350.00!

      When the clerk tells him $350.00 is the standard rate, the man insists on speaking to the Manager.

      The Manager appears, listens to the man, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for the husband and wife to use..

      'But we didn't use them,' the man complains.

      'Well, they are here, and you could have,' explains the Manager. He goes on to explain they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. 'The best entertainers from New York , Hollywood and Las Vegas perform here,' the Manager says.

      'But we didn't go to any of those shows, 'complains the man again.

      'Well, we have them, and you could have,' the Manager replies.

      No matter what amenity the Manager mentions, the man replies,

      'But we didn't use it!'

      The Manager is unmoved, and eventually the man gives up and agrees to pay. He writes a check and gives it to the Manager.

      The Manager is surprised when he looks at the check.

      'But sir,' he says, this check is only made out for $50.00.'

      'That's correct,' says the man. 'I charged you $300.00 for sleeping with my wife.'

      'But I didn't!' exclaims the Manager.

      'Well, too bad,' the man replies. 'She was here and you could have.'


      According to a news report, a certain private school in Washington was recently faced with a unique problem. A number of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lip stick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints.

      Every night the maintenance man would remove them, and the next day the girls would put them back.

      Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night (you can just imagine the yawns from the little princesses).

      To demonstrate how difficult it had been to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance man to show the girls how much effort was required.

      He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it in the toilet, and cleaned the mirror with it. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirror.


      Artifacts and gifts for tourists are a major portion of an Indian reservation's economy.

      Thousands of visitors tour reservations each year and will not leave without purchasing at least one memento of traditional Indian culture.

      One enterprising Native American was able to outsell all of his competitors in the category of wooden dolls by selling them at a fraction of the cost others had to charge for them. Upon examining his dolls closely, they found that where hard wood was traditionally used, this Native American would use cheap pine on which he glued thin pieces of fine mahogany, thus being able to produce the dolls at an incredibly reduced price.

      While he claimed his dolls were still authentic Indian dolls, his competitors complained that they were only...... cheap Sioux veneers
      af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


      CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

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    3. #2
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      Re: feb fird

      Mae everybody, cute jokes Mick thanks hope all goes well at Julie's dads,how's he doing now? No rain do far this morning but looks overcast still,it's LB's birthday today and I wish she was here nothing new to report,no news is good news I guess,much love to all and wishes for a great BF Sunday!
      I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink

      I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me"

      Off the table no MATTER what.

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    5. #3
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      Re: feb fird

      MAE ALL...

      Det...they could call them STFU Tips and market them with one sticking out of each of your ears. LOL If I could have chipped out the frozen car I would have joined you for that steak. Have a great Sunday.

      Lav...hope you are still enjoying your peaceful weekend, I won't tell anyone. Had about 4 rabbits in the yard yesterday morning. Every time I took a pic the flash would startle them and they'd head for the trees. You got that right, never enough soup! Will have to start again as son ate the last of it for his breakfast while he's waiting for the hashbrown casserole to cook.

      Sam...what was the groundhog prediction for your neck of the woods? Ours was early spring, but it's going to take a lot to get out of this deep freeze.

      TG...glad you made if safe and sound. Now you rest and relax and stop that cold in it's path.

      Mick...it's bl...dy cold over here too. It's -18 with wind chills at -36! Won't be venturing outside either today. That just sucks about changing the detecting rules. If the state wants the finds they should go out and look for them their selves. Nice work on the new models they look great. Did you give yourself enough time to get spruced up? Enjoy your lunch.

      Pauly...LB is there in your thoughts and you're right, no news is good news. Hope you have a relaxing day.

      SK...got those drop down windows sorted yet? Hope you're enjoying your Sunday too.

      I'm attempting poached eggs for my breakie. I find them a hassle to make, they never turn out, but sometimes I just crave them. Everybody stay warm and safe today....PPQP

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      Re: feb fird

      Good evening Abbers,

      Not to brag or anything but it was sunny & 53 degrees today
      Gonna try to hit 60 on Tuesday, haha!!! Next weekend we'll be back in frozen land unfortunately.

      Mick, your models look great. You could do set design for a small theater if you ever get bored
      I hope your day went well & you enjoyed your lunch out. I'm sure you clean up nice!

      Pauly, I hope your daughter enjoyed her BD. It's hard when they're not close to home I'm sure.
      How are the little guys doing?

      PQ, you sure have gotten a case of winter all of a sudden, geez! Stay warm & eat soup
      I used to hate it when my kids ate up the planned leftovers, LOL

      Det, Sam, Cyn, Pie & SK - hello to all of you!


      Nothing much else going on here so I'll just say have a nice night!
      Lav
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

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    9. #5
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      Re: feb fird

      good morning everyone ,how are we all today then?all good I hope.rain here,snow has virtually gone now ,but the cold remains ..checked the rabbits water bottle ...frozen solid!temps are on the way up allegedly .ok so lets have a brew shall we?

      hiya Lav...how are you today then?hope all is well?Is it groundhog day yet or thereabouts?Had a good meal yesterday ,ended up sledging with Julies nephews son ..an enjoyable afternoon ..60 degrees?whats going on here?hope you have a good day .

      hiya ppqp...reading your post think Ive missed the groundhog day..didint realise it applied in Canadia too..yes I managed to get presentable ish out of my scruffs!that law ref the treasure is a real pain if it comes off....all it is is(sic) a money saving scheme at the moment they have to pay the finder an agreed sum albeit nowhere near the value.It would save all of that .they forget about all the stuff that wont be declared ..but it would be classed as theft ..any previous finds and equipment would be sequestrated .do you put vinegar in the pan when making poached eggs? as for the soup..make a hooge pot of it !!have a good day at work .

      hiya pauly ..hope lb had a good birfday...you doing ok today?same here not a great deal of news here either .hope your day goes well.

      hi everyone else hope things are good ...

      Hopalong Happychopper walks into the saloon and the bartender says
      "Howdy stranger, ain't seen you in these parts, so you must be here to watch the hanging".
      Hopalong looks the bartender menacely in the eyes and replies.
      "Nope,but seeing we're talking who are you hanging"?
      The bartender says " Well ain't you heard cowboy, we gonna string up Brown paper Rattler mighty high even the angels are gonna hear his neck break".
      Hopalong asks " Why they call him Brown paper Rattler"?
      The bartender says "Why old Rattler wears a brown paper Stetson, a brown paper waistcoat and even right down to brown paper socks".
      Hopalong then asks "So why you hanging him"? and the bartender replies.
      "For rustling".

      I found a magic lamp and wished for a d.ck like an elephant's trunk .

      It's a hit with all the ladies but I can't go in a bakery without it stealing all the buns .

      Some idiot has just honked his horn at me because he wants the parking space I am about to vacate. I guess I'll just have to sit here now til we're both dead.

      I've just completed my 127th OCD awareness course

      There was once a seer from 16th century France that got every single one of his predictions dead wrong.

      Nostradumbarse.

      The world record for a 30 second advertisement will be set during Superbowl 2019. A cool 5 million!.

      By the Duke of Edinburgh appealing for someone to insure him to drive.

      I told the doctor that my wife is in a lot of pain because of the hives.

      He took a look at her and said, "All this doesn't look like a rash."

      "i know, I kept telling her not to keep throwing rocks at those bees."
      af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


      CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

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      Re: feb fird

      Love the pics Mick! I want to live in one of those little towns! Cute bunnies as well!!
      Last edited by Jude58; February 4th, 2019 at 05:47 AM.

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    13. #7
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      Re: feb fird

      Mae everybody, that Superbowl was boring! I don't care for sports anyways but in past games I was able to feel some excitement for it,this one zilch Mick,love the bunny pics Lav,can't believe it was so warm for you,well warmish at least,boys are doing fine thanks for asking,only prob is Lou's bottom grown up teeth are coming in while he's still got his baby teeth so I'm worried they're gonna be crooked! One baby tooth is pretty loose but the other seems set still,grrrr,PQ,I was waiting to make soup til it got cold,now I haven't made any,think I'll toss some chicken noodle in the crock pot tomorrow, tonight is Philly cheesesteak cuz I have some cheap steak I need to use up,might rain again today and tomorrow, we'll see, much love to all and wishes for a great BF Monday!
      I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink

      I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me"

      Off the table no MATTER what.

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      Re: feb fird

      Mae all,

      Writing from the train on the way home... studying for a Life Transitions Specialist Certificate, so the time is going fast. I finally just started taking allergy meds, and that seems to help. Maybe it was all started by a dust allergy? Who knows...

      Sounds like everyone is plugging along-
      Mick,i loved the people on your little store who,were arm in arm, so sweet! Lav, crazy up and down in temps here too... i’ll be sorry to see the snow leave, it makes everything bright and pretty (in the coundty).paulu, sorry you are missing your girl, it’s the way it goes, right? PPQ, yum poached eggs, now i have a craving. Hello to all else @jope youare well —- gotta get ready ro change trains —- cheers all cor a great Monday

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      Re: feb fird

      MAE ALL...man it's cold out there!

      Lav...we're going to be 100 degrees colder than you tomorrow! The low tonight is -25 and with the windchill in the morning -40!

      Mick...yup I put vinegar in the pan but they still come out a mess. Maybe I have the water too hot? Oh well they still taste the same.

      Jude...good to see you.

      Pauly...yup the Superbowl sucked! Really wish the Rams had won. Interesting commercials though. It's good old mac & cheese for dinner tonight.

      TG...glad you're feeling better. Safe trip home.

      Time to thaw out and get dinner going. Have a peaceful night all....PPQP

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      Re: feb fird

      Evening greetings folks,

      Yep, we hit 63 degrees today ~ nice.
      The only problem was the last of the snow melting on the deck & obviously some dog was using it as her personal bathroom during the snowstorms, LOL
      The deck is clean & I've had a talk with Matilda.
      I ended up talking to SK last evening because I accidently called her while shoving my phone in my coat pocket. She is doing well but having internet issues & a password issue for this site. I have a feeling she will get it sorted out.

      Mick, the stupid groundhog, the infamous Punxsutawney Phil has predicted an early spring. He didn't look at the long range forecast because we're getting snow next week Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday, ugh. I have an electric warming base to keep the chicken's water from freezing. Amazon has one for rabbits: Farm Innovators Model HRB-20 Heated Water Bottle for Rabbits, 32-Ounce, 20-Watt
      Hi Jude!

      Pauly, this warm streak is simply a gift. The cold weather & snow will make a return sure as sh*t, LOL
      You can't make real Philly cheesesteaks - you don't have the proper rolls out there. Fly east someday & I'll buy you a proper cheesesteak. I haven't eaten one in years but I did like them at one time

      Cyn, I have always had the dust allergy thing too. I have stopped visiting 'antique' shops just for that reason.
      Good luck on your course.

      Hello to PQ, how's the snow?

      Hello to Det, Pie & Sam.

      Have a nice night everyone.
      Lav
      Last edited by Lavande; February 4th, 2019 at 06:55 PM.
      AF since 03/26/09
      NF since 05/19/09
      Success comes one day at a time

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