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Thread: 23 feb

  1. #1
    Registered User. Mick's Avatar

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    23 feb

    mae all how are we ,good hopefully ..there was a strange orange thing in the sky earlier with a bit of blue...it didnt hang around for long and has since been replaced by vertical/horizontal water .blue has turned to a pretty shade of grey bordering on black....and some people have got sunshine???how come ..we have got snow and rain on the way..All the drama over hereabout immigration laws and asylum seeker will be irrellevant soon ..the fkn place will have sunk!!Never went detecting ,good idea methinks .Julie off work tomorrow ..we were going for a bimble over the moors but its wall to wall rain tomorrow with the chance of snow..
    hope everyone is well.

    Not much of a prize for coming first......I hear Bernie Sanders won the Nevada cactuses.

    I went to see a palm reader.
    She read my palm and said, "That will be 125, please."

    "Let me see your palms."

    She turned her palms up. "What about them?"

    I said ..if you look closely you can see the letters thief

    The guest had heard the strains of classical music but when he entered the drawing room he was amazed to see a large tomcat playing the piano.

    "And there is no sheet music," he noted with further astonishment.

    "No," said the proud owner. "Thomas writes and memorizes his own music and the piece he is playing now is one of my favourites."

    "You should have him orchestrated," said the guest.

    Thomas the tomcat leapt out of the window and has never been seen since.

    In England, there's a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days. It's called Monday.

    Summer in the UK usually:

    Hallo, did you have a good Summer?

    Yes indeed, we had a great barbeque that afternoon.


    A book just fell on my head.
    I’ve only got myshelf to blame.



    I found myself drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda yesterday.
    It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea.



    I walked into a bar the other night and bought a drink. As I was leaving the bar, a bowl of nuts said "Ohh..nice shoes...love your hair". "Well", I thought, "that's odd!" So I walked to the cigarette machine and it starts shouting..."Oi...f@#k off you dickhead! I'll smash your face in!"

    I went back to the bar to ask the bar tender what was going on and he said "Oh, sorry sir.... the nuts are complimentary and the cigarette machine's out of order."



    My wife has packed her bags and gone - just because of my fetish with touching pasta.
    I'm feeling cannelloni right now.



    I shot someone with a starting gun. I've been charged with race crimes.



    Q: "Can you do an impression of a Parrot?" asked my mate.
    A: "Can you do an impression of a Parrot?" I replied.



    I changed my iPod's name to Titanic. It's syncing now.



    I know a guy who's addicted to brake fluid. He says he can stop any time.



    When chemists die, they barium.



    Jokes about German sausage are the wurst.



    How does Moses make his tea? Hebrews it.



    I stayed up all night to see where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.



    I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. I just can't put it down.



    I did a theatrical performance about puns. It was a play on words.



    They told me I had type-A blood, but it was a Type-O.



    PMS jokes aren't funny — period.



    We're going on a class trip to the Coca-Cola factory. I hope there's no pop quiz.



    I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.



    Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn't control her pupils?



    I tried to catch some fog, but I mist.



    What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.



    England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.



    I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.



    Velcro: what a rip off!



    The earthquake in Washington obviously was the government's fault.

    and not forgetting...



    This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club, but I'd never met herbivore.








    Husband caught in the act

    One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her husband in bed with another woman.

    Angry, she became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their apartment, killing him instantly.

    When brought before the court on charges of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say to defend herself.

    "Well, Your Honor," she replied coolly. "I figured that at 92, if he could screw, he could fly!"
    Last edited by Mick; February 23rd, 2020 at 10:43 AM.
    af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


    CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

  2. #2
    Forum Subscriber. Lavande's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    Good evening friends!

    Thanks for the new week startup Mick.
    I don’t like to bimble in rain & snow, haha! I hope you get a surprise clearing tomorrow.

    Yep, we had a sunny 60 degrees here today, rather nice. Went to Lowes & picked up some flower seeds even though it’s too early to plant anything here.
    YB hasn’t made an attempt to work on my machine yet but i can always tell when he’s in thinking mode, Lol. Trying to rush him to do anything is like trying to move a mountain ~ it ain’t happening, haha.

    Hello to PQ, Cyn, Det, Pauly & Sam!

    Let’s all have a decent night!

    Lav
    AF since 03/26/09
    NF since 05/19/09
    Success comes one day at a time

  3. #3
    Registered User. Mick's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    Good afternoon all wow where is everybody today then? Weather here today is pretty horrific no more than 20 miles from me and there is snow all over the place I'm outside here the rain is actually horizontal weather forecast for snow later on so as you can guess haven't haven't been out much today in fact most of the time I've spent up in the loft doing the railway part of the track split and it meant and to remove about 6-ft of track including that inside the tunnel... lots of swear words later mission accomplished

    Hiya lav 60 degrees weather ? what's that all about would you like to trade some Sleet for sunshine has YB started yet or are we still going through the strategy thinking phase I'm sure he will get a round tuit

    Big hello to everyone else, don't know what you're up to where you've been but hope all is well take care have a nice day
    af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


    CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

  4. #4
    Registered User. Determinator's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    Happy UnHung Monday ABeroooos!

    pretty low-bat here today... just a crazy insomnia night.. agh. but that's ok. Got my one shoot done for the day and now
    catching up on house things, repaired a tripod etc.

    Mick, that almost sounds like a UFO sighting! sorry weather is crap mate. Movie day perhaps?

    Lav, good luck on the machine and YB

    Made some yummy chicken and asparagus on the grill last night which was grand. tonight prolly leftovers and girly has lacrosse so
    we'll be hussling around. oh darn just remembered I need to get a replacement water filter for the one that broke.

    off to walmart! oh boy...

    be well peeps, back soon with fashion stories from wallyworld
    nosce te ipsum
    (Know Thyself)

  5. #5
    Forum Subscriber. Lavande's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    Good evening Abbers,

    Not to brag but we had another one of those nice days here
    The rest of the week is supposed to be damp, oh well.

    Mick, YB spent time looking at my machine, removed the rotary hook for a big time cleaning. It’s put back together, oiled & timed SO I’ll go see if it actually works. Fingers crossed!
    Sounds like you had some excitement with the trains today, LOL Stay dry & stay inside so you don’t get your hair wet

    Det, insomnia is weird! I seem to get a few decent nights sleep then all of a sudden I’m up wide awake at 3 am. Can’t figure it out!
    I’m lucky I have a hardware store where I buy filters for our well pump. Keeps me out of Walmart, haha!1

    Hello to PQ, Cyn, Pauly & Sam. Hope everyone is OK.

    Have a decent night everyone!
    Lav
    AF since 03/26/09
    NF since 05/19/09
    Success comes one day at a time

  6. #6
    Registered User. porqoui's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    MAE ALL...

    Mick...thanks for kick off the thread yesterday. Sorry I didn't post, the day just got away from me. Sounds like it's a good idea to stay indoors with that weather. We're still sitting just below zero and chinook is supposed to arrive tomorrow sending our temps up to 54F with lots of sunshine. I'll send you some. How come the track split? That must of been a pain having to replace it inside the tunnel. Glad you got the job done.

    Lav...was going to send this to you RoundTuit.jpg but it appears YB actually did it. Hope that was the answer. Glad you're getting some decent weather and sorry about the forecasted snow but believe me I don't miss it. We had snow overnight and light flurries this morning, just enough to make everything slippery. Our low tonight is higher than our high was today. LOL If this keeps up I'm going to have to go through all the shoes my brother in law through into my car.

    Det...you'd think you'd sleep like a log with your busy schedule but for some reason that isn't the way it works out. Glad you were still able to get your shoot in today and that the lacrosse game doesn't keep you out too late tonight. Grilled chicken and asparagus sounds yummy, may be my choice for dinner tomorrow.

    Pauly...made a post of homemade chicken noodle soup yesterday so it's left overs for me tonight. Hope you had a good day.

    Off to get into relax mode. Have a good night all.....PPQP

  7. #7
    Registered User. Samstone's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    PQ, I need one of those buttons!
    Liberated 5/11/2013

  8. #8
    Registered User. paulywogg's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    Mae everybody, Sam good to see you Lav and Det I'm the same, have a few good night's of sleep then have an unexplained bout of insomnia! Drives me crazy, makes me feel nuts and ruins my whole next day but I guess it's just normal, not much going on here which is a good thing, hope everyone has a great BF Tuesday!
    I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink

    I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me"

    Off the table no MATTER what.

  9. #9
    Registered User. treegirl's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    Hello there - below is what I posted on Sunday, just in case you missed it, lol. I am working 7 days a week, so I really have no clue as to what day it is! Last night I nearly missed a rehab appointment for the dog, as I had the wrong time and the wrong day on my mind... do we think I am maybe "losing it?" (As I left the rehab, I wished them a nice weekend! )

    Well, two more days of my ever-more-dependent client, and she'll be off in a plane to Brazil for 2 months, whew. Then by the time she gets back, I'll be packing up my own place, so she'll be out of luck! Actually, I like her a lot - totally brilliant, but a little nutty, OK by me.

    Mick, so sorry about the weather, that sounds absolutely dreadful. Lav, I saw snowdrops (bulbs) and some other pretty brave springtime plants sprouting yesterday, what a gift. Det, take care, loss of sleep is hard - I slept poorly the night before last, and I was a wreck yesterday. Pauly, how's things, what's up in Pauly-world? PQ, wow more weather swings for you. Maybe take a few pairs of shoes out of the car a time? I constantly have big bags of my client's things in my car, and it weighs down my spirit... always yakking at me to be taken care of... good luck! Hello to you Sam and all others. Wishing you a good...Tuesday? Not sure, sheesh...

    Below is from Sunday -

    "Mae all -

    Well, from stuffed toilet rolls to dinner with a Presidential candidate, tea in NYC, etc, the news is hopping around here.

    Mick, what a clever way to entertain the peskies, loved imagining that. Lav, I really hope YB gets interested in fixing the machine... he needs a winter project, right? Pauly, so sorry about the iron issues, wonder why? And I like Lav's solution to the car seat - your back needs a break! I hear ya about the political situation - it's very upsetting. Det, congrats on all the shoots and getting to your special meetings, along with a fancy dinner? Sheesh! I don't seem to be able energy to muster for getting excited about any of them, ah well. Sorry about getting stuck... that would about drive me insane. Hello to PPQ and Sam and all dropping by...

    Wishing all a great Sunday..."

  10. #10
    Registered User. Mick's Avatar

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    Re: 23 feb

    Hello and how are we today then? Hope all is well with you well today we've had rain, snow, sunshine and fog not bad at all. I've just got back from the R S P C A rescue centre for animals I was taking some bits down there for a friend who runs the place... the hardest thing to do with leave without any rabbits there were some beauties there including two gorgeous Dutch rabbits I just had to focus on that wouldn't be fair on Jeeves or Bonnie so let's have afternoon tea

    Hello treacle how are you today then question mark hope all is well hope you got a better sleep yes the weather here at the moment it's pretty poor, lots of flooding around areas in the close proximity but fortunately as I said previously I live on a Hill take care and look after yourself

    Hiya pauly how are you then? Normal what does that mean haha have a great day

    hi Sam how are you doing my friend and seen you on here for quite a while now yes I think we could all do with one of those round to it buttons what are you up to now mate?

    Hiya ppqp how are you today the question mark hope all is well well what do you mean you've got lots of sunshine? Surely that should be ours it was a real pain putting the track together especially with Mr Magoo eyes and trying to see through the tunnel put it this week if there had been a swear box, I would now be on a world cruise as I look out of the window now it is starting to snow again and you talk about sunshine take care have a good day

    Hiya lav
    And how are you today? Hope all is well well did you check the machine does it work? That you on the way to big industry now have a great day

    Hiya det how are you today my friend? So you had an Insomnia fuelled night did you ? That's the trouble you spend every waking moment thinking about it ha ha so did you get the water filter replaced?

    that's me I'll try and put some jokes on later on

    A bunch of hippies came into my Quick Cash shop earlier carrying an antique fish tank. When I asked them what they wanted, they started dancing and singing...
    ��this is the pawning of the age old aquarium��

    Deontay Wilder has said the elaborate outfit he wore on his ring walk weighed 40 pounds and was the reason for his defeat to Tyson Fury.

    That's funny! I could have sworn he removed it before the fight.

    Tesco says they are to axe 1,800 jobs in their bakeries. They hope the staff will find new rolls to fill.

    I went to an art gallery yesterday and saw some still life. Was mind blowing! The council workmen were on a job outside.

    A guy at work was telling me he was part native American. "I said really , what tribe?"
    He said "the cone" . "Never heard of it", he said "no were found mostly in the central reservation"

    87254882_2946526925368012_365383648238632960_n.jpg
    Last edited by Mick; February 25th, 2020 at 05:42 PM.
    af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


    CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

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