Abbers April something (;))~2020

[paulywogg]

Mae everybody, Mick when my mom had bronchitis years ago her cough lasted for forever too, you get some rest my friend! Lav, maybe grandson is reacting to the pollen? Lou has been getting nosebleed too lately and we think it's allergies poor kids, our lockdown might be extended cuz some yahoos decided to get together and form a protest yesterday at a government building, 200-300 people, defo not social distancing and no masks, probably set us back PQ, I'd send you our warmer weather but I'm hogging it to work on my tan if you can't tone it-tan it is my motto I live by Cyn, improvement is good-no matter how long it's taking, much love to all and wishes for a great BF Sunday!

[Mick]

Pauly ...that just about sums it up ....there are at least 28 weeksin April! good on you starting the fred up ..how is everyone ?hope we are well ..I feel tons better today ..and yep Imade the mistake of saying so ...to be greeted by .."see Itold you so... that if you rest its your body telling you tto slow down"...as he nods in agreement carrying on washing dishes and hoovering up ... absolutely gorgeous day out there ..really nice and sunny outside .Ive no doubt there will be dingbats here too Pauly ..bit of sun and thats it
how is everyone else doing? hope we are all ok? teegee hows hubby?and you too obviously !
Hiya Lav ...how are yuo today? hope all is ok ..I heard this mot=rning that they are trialling a few garden centres over here..opening them to include a safe method of shopping ..otherwise they say there are millions of plants going to be wasted ..so we shall see what happens .

hiya ppqp how are you today then?hope all is well in Royal exile land!did you know when of the best things for bronchitis recovery is ......wait for it ....chicken soup ..and some say tomato too.

hiya det n sam ...hope you are ok ..

Looks like Donald Trump has been taking math education from Dianne Abbott.

"I've save billions of lives with my lock down measures. "

Population of America, 330 million.

Prince Harry has thanked NHS workers and volunteers in the battle against coronavirus and said he's incredibly proud of the British public's response.

After he shafted the Royal Family and f
cked off to live in Los Angeles.

Going line dancing tonight...thanks to my coke dealer

"When I was younger I felt like a man trapped inside a woman’s body. Then I was born.

"One in four frogs is a leap frog."

“You know you’re working class when your TV is bigger than your book case.”

“Most of my life is spent avoiding conflict. I hardly ever visit Syria.”

“Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last long if you’re fat.”

"I was thinking of running a marathon, but I think it might be too difficult getting all the roads closed and providing enough water for everyone."

“You can’t lose a homing pigeon. If your homing pigeon doesn’t come back, then what you’ve lost is a pigeon.”

“My Dad said, always leave them wanting more. Ironically, that’s how he lost his job in disaster relief.

"I wanted to do a show about feminism. But my husband wouldn't let me."

"One thing you’ll never hear a Hindu say… ‘Ah well, you only live once."

"My Dad told me to invest my money in bonds. So I bought 100 copies of Goldfinger."

"My wife told me: 'Sex is better on holiday.' That wasn’t a nice postcard to receive."

[Lavande]

Greetings Abbers,

My grandson left just before lunch so I sent him home with leftover pizza slices from his dinner last night, haha!
Just got back from my walk, missed it the last few days due to crummy weather & other stuff. Got half a dozen masks made this afternoon, need to do that many more this evening. Absolutely everyone wants one from me, Lol
As far as reopening businesses, it’s too soon, at least here. There are still new cases in our county every day. The protestors are planning to march in our state capital tomorrow. I say let them jam a thousand of them together for a protest & see who gets sick in a few days.

Pauly, I hope it’s just allergies causing these nosebleeds. I have tried to get his parents to address it with the pediatrician but I don’t think they have so far.
It was a lovely 58 degrees when I set out for my walk. YB decided to go along & he pulled on heavy gloves, haha!

Mick, I hate to tell you this but once you’ve had bronchitis you’re likely to get it again in the future. My daughter has been dealing with it since 1st grade & now she’s borderline asthmatic. Got to be careful with this stuff. Listen to yuor body, not your hyperactive brain, LOL

Cyn, hope you are doing well, husband too! I think 2020 is going to be a lost year for a lot of us. I still can’t quite picture the future after all this is over.

Hello to Det, Sam & PQ!!!!

I’m baking a big loaf of Polish sauerkraut rye bread & it really smells good

Have a nice night everyone!
Lav

[treegirl]

Thanks for the startup Pauly! Sorry about the protesters; I think they're getting plenty of help from Washington. I have no problem with it if they agree not to go to the ER if they get sick... sheesh . take care, and work on that tan!

Mick good luck and try to reign it in for a bit, eh?

Lav, I like the sound of those walks... YB decided to come along? Well well...

PPQ, hope all is OK.

Det, hangin in? Feeling OK?

Hi to Sam and and others...

Today I am seeing no progress, maybe even seeingbthat there is a little backsliding in the last few days. I am seeingbvery high pulse rates in the night and a high resting pulse, so plan to ask the doc for a referral for a heart check... can't hurt... he was supposed to have one years ago because of chemo, but never did it. It's time... I 'm worn out by the checking stats and wondering... I eant to know. He's cleared the virus, so we don't have to go to ER... maybe a cardiologist in the same organization as the hospital. Anyway, I see no way right now that he could drive x-country with me by the end of May... I wonder what th next weeks will bring?! Well, time will tell...

Big hopeful hugs to all - stay safe!

[paulywogg]

Mae everybody, Cyn I'm sorry to hear that about hubs can he get an appointment with a cardiologist soon? I was really hoping he was a clean bill of health by now, healing vibes sent! Lav, I'll bet your eyes get buggy after all that sewing but hey it's for a good thingI understand the frustration of people,I do BUT from what I gather we're all seeing new cases pop up daily so it'll only get worse if people are all out and about,who knows, Mick, continue to listen to your body like Lav says, PQ, hope all is ok with you guys, much love to all and wishes for a great BF Monday (hey I remembered!)

[porqoui]

MAE ALL...

Mick...oooh tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches, sounds like a plan for dinner tonight. Glad you're feeling better, I'm not feeling great today but nothing serious.

Lav...I agree it's way too early to open businesses. Had an email from a garden member and she said there was about 20 guys playing basketball in the hockey rink yesterday. You can't fix stupid but you can stay away from them. Just working on the garden procedures the last couple of days has exhausted me. What's up with that?

TG...sorry to hear things aren't going as well as we all hoped. You must be exhausted, and here I am complaining about a couple of days work. I hope you can get into a specialist soon, I know not knowing is really hard to deal with.

Pauly...well stamp me impressed that you remembered it's Monday. I saw on FB a post reminding us of those underpants you could buy with the days of the week on them. (I had a set) They'd come in handy now. LOL

It's supposed to go up to 68F today but I think I'm just going to stay put. Maybe some chicken soup will fix what's ailing me. It's probably just not eating properly and not getting any physical exercising. Hope everyone has a great Monday....PPQP

[Mick]

hiya all...its me ....a very quick jump in ..hope we are doing ok ...teegee you get hubs to the horsepital asap!!Ive been busy doing nothing again today ...cut the grass ..the rest of the time just getting in the road ..Kitchen is finished so Ive put everything back ..I havent had coffee for 2 days now ..madam read somewhere that it irritates something ..dont know what ..but in fairness ..no coffee ...no coughy .
ppqp ..you got you day of the week undies on ? Ive got socks the same ...trouble is with me one leg will see toosdi the other friday

hiya pauly ..you ok ? hope so girl you stay safe ..

heard the latest? we are getting ppe for nurses from China ...and the first lot failed to arrive yesterday ..not only did they give us this crap but now they are producing the ppe for abroad????

hi Lav you good? hope so Ive done quite a bit of plant dividing....plus marigold seeds are thru petunias too.glad you got your walk in ..Im not doing anything till next week.must be honest it is frustrating th o

Hi Sam Det and all the uvvers ..stay safe folks .

"How's your new Thai girlfriend, Dave?"

"How do you know her name?"

America, do you remember in "jaws" when the Mayor was so concerned about the economy, he told everyone it was safe to get back in the water?

If there are any positives from these four weeks of Coronavirus lockdown:

I haven't had a problem with my Windows PC.
My Amazon prime account isn't about to renew.
I haven't had a recent car accident.
My internet connection isn't about to be disconnected.

Or at least, no-one has phoned me to tell me so.

Diary: (Life Out In The Sticks)
1 month into lockdown.
6 weeks since the last supermarket drop.
2 weeks until the next supermarket drop.
I called into our local village shop a few days ago, the only food they on display was a packet of Garibaldi biscuits 2 tins of mulligatawny soup and an out of date corned beef pasty. I'd have needed a mortgage to buy any of them. (Unusually well stocked for them, let alone in these circumstances!)
We have slowly emptied the freezer & food cupboards. Today every meal has consisted of Coco Pops using baby formula for makeshift milk.
Tomorrow we plan to tie our dog to a tree in the park before dining on Winalot Madras served on a bed on a bed of Jacob's cream crackers.
Things are looking really desperate, so bad that the missus reckons before long we'll have to start eating the contents of the fruit bowl!

I used to admire Julian Assange.

But I’m no longer impressed by people forced to stay inside for long periods of time.

I met a bloke who said he was Richie Blackmore and used to be in Rainbow.

He must think I'm stupid, when I was a kid I watched every episode and it was just Geoffrey, George, Bungle and Zippy.

I’ve been feeling a bit down and bored during the lockdown so my next door neighbour suggested I should do some gardening and gave me some seeds. Unfortunately it all went to pot and as a result the police arrested me for cannabis farming.

Richard Branson started his business empire from a phone box. Sounds like he might end his career living in one.

[Lavande]

Good evening Abbers,

Just back from my walk with the dog, no YB today haha!
Some big storm is brewing up to hit here tomorrow afternoon, swell. More masks in process. I am going to ask these people for a paid vacation day or two, getting tired LOL
A friend & former coworker died today, She just turned 67 last month, too young. Her sons are posting on FB but not giving the cause of death. I last chatted with her on April 2 & she was fine. This makes me sad, really.

Cyn, I agree with you & would push for a cardiac consult for your husband. Some of these things can be fixed with a proper assessment & treatment.
Our Gov stated today that he will begin to reopen some businesses on May 8. I know they are reopening the booze stores this week but you have to call in your order between 9-1 & limit you to 6 bottles. Ugh!

Pauly, I had my days mixed up all weekend, today I’m back on track, haha!
I have to get back to my sewing machine in a few minutes now that I’ve been away from it for a few hours.

PQ, if people want to go out & play I say fine. Just don’t show up in the ER when they get sick
Congrats on your warm temps - it’s still chilly here LOL

Mick, hang in there a bit, your body is still healing.
For today’s giggle I made a giant bowl of vegan style macaroni salad - no mayo & boy was it good!!! Love having lots of leftovers.

Hello to Det & Sam, hope you are well!

OK, back to the grind,
Have a nice night all.

Lav

[treegirl]

Quick hello, will post more tomorrow... Lav , so very very sorry to hear about your friend's passing, gosh what a shock...

Wishing everybody well - more tomorrow--

[Mick]

hello everyone ...early start here fpr me .just been out to check on Jeeves...he def wasnt a happy bunny last night..but I wasnt sure as to why ..Next door had a massive paddling pool and it blew over the fence..yep twas really windy..and I think that may have frightened him ..just been to check him ...seems ok this morning.still blowy out there

hiya teegee...hows you andhubby ?any news on getting a test ..? Just watched the final episode last night of Belgravia ...well worth watching.

well went out to see Jeeves ....he is fine ..its her that isnt so good..not eating no stomach movement etc obviously pigged out on something ....massaged stomach gave her 3 lots of meds ...can hear her tummy moving now ..so we shall see how she goes on .

hiya Lav...sorry to hear about your friend passing on yesterday .itsthe one cert in life ..its how we use the in between time that counts ..so the off licences are open and you call your order in ..between 9 and 1 ..allowed 6 bottles?sounds ok ..though in days gone by dont know what Id have done by 2pm!!
take care enjoy your concoction making!

hiya paulette...that made you look up didnt it?thought you were in trouble ?ha ha ..here you go pauly .....stay safe

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hi ppqp..how are you todaythen ?all good?feeling any better after your chicken soup?I hope so ..card school still going strong?take care

"lucy in the sky with diamonds"
John lennon was shit at cluedo



Q) What's small, brown, hairy and wears sunglasses?

A) A coconut in disguise.

If you've never worn a blindfold when playing darts before then you should try it,

You don't know what you're missing!

Approverypriate!

Sorry.. that was very in appropriate.

As a painter, I'm proud to say that some of my work is now on show in the National Gallery,

I did the skirting boards.


I couldn't work out how to fasten my seatbelt.

Then it clicked.

Knock, Knock
Who's there?
Dishes
Dishes who?
Dishes the Police come out with your hands up.

Q) How do you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator?

A) You will see one in a while and one later.

If you work out how a magician does a trick..

Is he disillusioned?

Q) How do you make a cat flap?
A) Throw it off a cliff.

Did you hear about the lonely pyromaniac?,

He's still looking for the perfect match.

My son took his first steps this morning..

The window cleaner was furious.



Remember.. maths and alcohol don't mix.

Never drink and derive!



The rotation of the planet Earth really makes my day.

My mate is a professional jester, but he's currently out of work

He's nobody's fool!

I had a Bonnie Tyler Satnav, but it was awful
Just kept telling me to turn around, and every now and then it fell apart.

Don’t you hate it when people
answer their own questions?

I do.

I recently ended a 5 year relationship

It’s OK though, it wasn’t my relationship.

My pet mouse 'Elvis' died last night..

He was caught in a trap.

I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day..

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

Yesterday evening I had to change a lightbulb, a bit later on I crossed the road. Then I walked into a bar..

My life is a joke.

Q) What lies on its back, one hundred feet in the air?

A) A dead centipede.

I occasionally enjoy having my steak undercooked.. but that’s rare.

My grandfather was killed by a steam train,

He was chuffed to bits.

I was once arrested for resisting arrest.

I still don't know how.

My new book is called 'Wooooooooh',

I'm starting to regret using a Ghost Writer.

2B or not 2B.
That is the pencil.

Did you hear about the French man who could only count to seven?

He had a Huit allergy.