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Thread: June 14

  1. #11
    Registered User. Mick's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    hiya all...hope we are good today ..more storms here today...more overnight too.the benefits of living on a hill!as we speak there is a massive thunderstorm starting.the temp tonight is 24 degrees ..so its hot water!last night we had a months rain in a night ...tonight they reckon we are going to get 50/60mm in 3 hours .Yep ,when I go out ,and into the shops I wear a mask ..def not convinced our govt has got it right!

    take care everyone .

    So Starbucks have announced that the lockdown has cost their business about 1.3bn.

    Or in other words, that's equivalent to four hot chocolates, an Americana and two sandwiches.

    Can we start a rumour that Piers Morgan is a slave trader?

    "Dad?"

    "Hello son, how's your holiday?"

    "I'm in a cell for something I didn't do. I need you to send ten grand, or they'll bang me up for two years."

    "See you in 2022, then."

    I watched a tramp pull fish after fish out of a canal and with a twig and a bit of string with a bent nail on the end,

    "Wow, that's amazing, " I said, "why don't you keep some for food instead of keep throwing them back?"

    "I can get fish any time, " he replied, "it's that fcking mattress I'm after. "

    For sale: Model of the Titanic.

    Comes complete with invisible iceberg.

    I read that you should never use slug pellets in your garden as they are poisonous to hedgehogs.

    So I put a baccy tin full of beer down instead.

    Now I can't sleep, as the garden's full of pissed-up slugs and hedgehogs singing and fighting all night.
    af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


    CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

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  3. #12
    Registered User. paulywogg's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    Starbucks lies if they say that for realz, when Kell and I were doing grocery delivery we'd drive by and it was slammed everytime at the drive thru so we were able to try local places instead, PQ, I bought a shield off my coworker cuz she looked good in hers I looked like Jeffrey Dahmer in mine so never wear it haha!
    I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink

    I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me"
    Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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  5. #13
    Registered User. paulywogg's Avatar

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    I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink

    I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me"
    Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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  7. #14
    Forum Subscriber. Lavande's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    Greetings folks!

    Still nice here, lucky for us!
    Made a quick stop & dropped off freshly baked sourdough for my son & his family. Just handed it over the fence & talked for a few minutes.

    Sam, I stopped in the grocery store while I was out today & was pleased to see every single shopper & employee with a mask on. You do get used to them after a while.
    I don’t know how many black snakes we have here but i’ve run into 2 so far. If they would be happy just eating field mice I wouldn’t mind so much. Good luck with your new chicks!

    Mick, I doubt that any government has it right on the virus with the exception of NZ. They were smart & listened to the experts. FL opened up beaches, bars & restaurants 2 weeks ago & now they are having 1000+ new cases each day, duh!
    The year is almost half over & I think we should just accept that 2020 was a total disaster.

    Pauly, the face shields are helpful but too be really safe you should have a mask on underneath for full protection. Think about what the nurses are going thru with all that. It doesn’t make you look like Jeffery Dahmer, haha!! Make sure you disinfect that shield frequently.

    PQ, I am FB friends with Narilly & she posted pictures of all that hail, goodness!!! Lots of cracked windshields too.
    Missing your TGIF? Hmm, maybe you should be planning a special meal for Fridays or something to celebrate

    Det, Pie hello to you!
    Cyn, if you’re checking in I wish you a safe trip west

    Have a good night everyone!
    Lav
    AF since 03/26/09
    NF since 05/19/09
    Success comes one day at a time

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  9. #15
    Registered User. paulywogg's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    Mae everybody, Lav that thing is ugly and I feel embarrassed with it on! A mask is annoying but tbh I forget I'm wearing it sometimes so there's that, my mom and brother stopped in for a bit yesterday cuz they had to take his stepson to the orthodontist, it was good to see them but we were all masked up and I think my mom was paranoid of catching the virus, there's not been any cases in her rural county, I told them just be careful if they stop at any stores, I'd hate it if they caught it down here cuz our rates are in the up and up too, PQ, crazy hail sheesh! We get that here would you believe in the middle of summer sometimes, waves to Mick, Pie, Sam and Det hope everyone has a great BF Wednesday!
    I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink

    I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me"
    Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

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  11. #16
    Registered User. Mick's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    hiya all ...how are we today then? storm still going on here tonight ..All seems positive over here with the government ..everywhere opening up ,despite the increase in deaths today? Im sure there is logic somewhere..
    Pauly...if it saves your life ...who cares what it looks like ...are you back cutting hair again?stay safe ..

    hiya Lav ....hows things in snakesville today?any more ?yep 2020 is a defo non starter ..jeez in weeks time its the longest day for us ...and then its down to nights getting darker and waiting for the Chrimbo coca cola truck ..take it easy and look after yourself .

    hiya ppqp ..you ok ...you still getting storms too?take care

    big hello to everyone else
    af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


    CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

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  13. #17
    Forum Subscriber. Lavande's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    Greetings Abbers,

    Pauly, like your Mom we have only had 1 case in our township but quite a few more 7 miles up the road where my son lives. I would feel paranoid back in my old home town where I know they’ve had many cases. More people = more cases! Keep wearing your mask & washing your hands frequently & you should be OK.

    Mick, no snake sightings today just plenty of groundhogs, bunny rabbits & whatever I may missed, haha.
    I happen to know there is a nest of baby bunnies under the chicken house, hope the snake doesn’t find them. Sorry you’re still having stormy weather. Just heard to expect storms from now thru the weekend.

    Hello to PQ, hope you are OK.

    Hello Det, check in buddy!

    Hello to Pie & Cyn!

    Guess I’ll go take a walk around the yard & yank some weeds or something.
    Have a nice night all!

    Lav
    AF since 03/26/09
    NF since 05/19/09
    Success comes one day at a time

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  15. #18
    Registered User. paulywogg's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    Mick, I'm trying to find the scouser jokes you posted a couple of weeks ago, I wanna tell them to Lb haha
    I have too much shit to do today and tomorrow to drink

    I'm taking care of the "tomorrow me"
    Drinkin won't help a damn thing! Will only make me sick for DAYS and that ugly, spacey dumb feeling-no thanks!

  16. #19
    Registered User. porqoui's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    MAE ALL...

    Lav...saw you were online so waited my turn to post. LOL Were the bunnies under the chicken house there last year? It was a cooler, windy day today but that was ok because I've been working most of it. Boss finally made some decisions and we're going to go ahead with the new membership database/online program registration software so I'm going to have my work cut out for me. I definitely have to reconfigure my home workspace as I can't continue to lean over the coffee table to work.

    Pauly...I thought you looked kinda cute. I'm glad your mom is being very cautious while out and about, she definitely gets it. I was so lucky that the damaging hail and wind stayed away from this side of the city.

    Mick...how are you doing? Hope all is ok and that your storm isn't too severe. It is just starting to rain here and is supposed to continue for the rest of the week but no big storms in the forecast. Since I spent the day actually working I've got a bridge game booked for tonight. YAY

    Shout out to Det, Pi, Sam and TG.

    Time to figure out dinner. Have a good evening all....PPQP

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  18. #20
    Registered User. Mick's Avatar

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    Re: June 14

    Pauly......cant find them but heres a shedful for you ...

    Give a scouser a fish, and he can eat for a day.

    Give him a fishing rod and he'll put it in your letterbox and nick your car keys.

    My mate from Liverpool has started working in a local slaughterhouse, stunning the animals.

    They've never seen a scouser with a job.

    Police in Liverpool pulled over a local lad and were amazed to find the car taxed M.O.T. tested and insured. It wasn't stolen and there were no stolen goods or drugs found. The driver was sober AND He had a full licence and no points.
    A police spokesman said, "We had no option but to fine him 80 for wasting police time."

    Police attending an incident in Liverpool returned to their car to find it up on bricks.
    Officers are working tyrelessly to find the culprit.

    Over the past week I've burgled nine flats in Liverpool.

    It feels great to get my stuff back.

    A Liverpool pensioner has died and left all his worldly possessions to complete strangers.

    Although they were the original owners.

    If you hold a shellsuit to your ear, you can hear the sound of a scouser robbing a house.

    I never realised how realistic these 3D televisions were until I fell asleep watching Liverpool the other night on "Match of the Day".

    When I awoke, my wallet and stereo had been nicked

    Scousers. For fags, booze and season tickets, there's child benefit. For everything else, there's someone else's MasterCard.

    Wandering round Liverpool yesterday with my wife and our toddler son, when he decided to have a tantrum, throwing his favourite red toy car out of his buggy.

    By the time I picked it up, it was blue and had new number plates.

    I asked my 13 year old Scouse daughter to stop smoking at the dinner table.
    She was setting a bad example to her children.

    I was walking through the Liverpool One shopping mall when someone shouted "Stop, thief" !
    Fck me, I've never seen so many people take off so suddenly like that in my life.

    All Scousers can trace their family tree back at least 15 generations.

    All the way back to 1990.

    I met a girl from Liverpool online and she has stolen my heart.
    Amongst other things.

    Temperatures plummeted in Liverpool today due to the cold snap.
    Weather reporters stated that it was so cold, a scouser was seen with his hands in his own pockets

    How do you starve a scouser??

    Hide his welfare cheque under his working boots

    My mate from Liverpool has just been given the key to the city.

    Or crowbar as he likes to call it.

    A Scouser started working at our place today.
    About fcking time, Hes been here two years.

    I was standing in a queue when the Scouser next to me whispered, "Would you like to buy a Rolex?"

    "Let me see it first," I replied.

    "Shh, not so loud," he said, "the bloke in front of us is wearing it."

    Due to the forecasted Freezing temperatures next week Liverpool schools have advised parents to wear 2 pairs of pyjamas when dropping off their kids at school.

    Walking through town today I saw a car with a bumper sticker reading 'Liverpool. Never Forget'

    So I smashed a window and nicked the stereo, just to remind him.

    My mate texted me saying, 'I'm in Liverpool for the night! Where's the best place to go?'

    I replied, 'Bus station.'

    Just been in a shop in Liverpool and the packet said, 'Multi pack, not to be sold separately'.

    I had to get my Fathers Day card from somewhere else.

    A fourteen year old Scouse girl asked me to buy her a bottle of whisky.

    "Do you want to get me into trouble?," I said.

    "Ok," she replied, "after I drink the whisky."

    Went to see a Scouse Magician's act.

    Made my fcking wallet disappear.

    What's the difference between Scousers and Noah?
    Noah only took two of everything.

    My scouse mate was inconsolable after his house burnt to the ground.

    "Everything," he sobbed, "everything I ever stole was in that house."

    Top tip for residents in Liverpool. If you lock yourself out don't worry about phoning a locksmith.
    Simply wait behind some bushes until someone breaks into your home and follow them inside.

    Any T.V programme shown in Liverpool that depicts people working, carries the subtitle 'Please do not try this at home'.

    The victims of the Coronavirus are going to be quarantined in Liverpool.

    "This is fcking disgusting, we don't want to be near this infected sh.thole stain of a place, just how are we going to survive?"

    Said the virus.

    I thought I was at a fancy dress party in Liverpool, the room was full of people in masks and dark clothing all carrying bags with swag written on them.

    Turns out they were all just off to work.

    hiya ppqp..Im doing ok how did the bridge game go ?did you win?we dont have dining room ..its now the hr and contracts office for the jail..I saw the pics of the hail ..wow ..lucky you missed that ..

    hiya Lav ...you ok? hows the rabbits ?you need to get the snakes !its foggy here this morning ...but turning to rain later .....might do some work on the railway today .

    big hello to everyone else
    af since the fourth of July 2012...howzat then America..now proudly marching into year 5..done that one..now bimbling into year 6..tick ..done that one too..as he casually strolls into numero 7


    CHILDHOOD IS LIKE BEING DRUNK.EVERYONE REMEMBERS WHAT YOU DID,EXCEPT YOU.

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