It seems like every two weeks

[empyr3al]

@Tidegirl if you live anywhere near me rehab is free in Ontario and could be supplemented by insurance or in Canada's case another province. It costs like 30,000$ a month. Its serious cash if its not free. Sounds like thats unaffordable at this point unless you are canadian.

I am severely sad about the situation you are in with your father, my father is 71 and will be getting ill eventually but actually still continues to work. Follow your gut (other than drinking).

[Tidegirl]

Unfortunately I'm in the U.S. So rehab would be expensive but I think paid by insurance -- as of now-- who knows what will happen with health care here soon. Right now I haven't drank for several hours and I'm going to try to stick it out. I know it will be tough but it has to happen.

[empyr3al]

@Tidegirl I'm certain you know its the first 72 hours. Do you have valium (diazepam) or dimenhydrinate? Drinking water will be hard if you were hardcore, so dimenhydrinate helps. I find squirts of that water colour stuff helped me start to drink water. Dimenhydrinate (be sure thats what it is, read the box or bottle) its OTC as many different things like original antihistamines, if thats where you need to find it, or motion pills. Just a tip if things get out of hand and you are doing this not in a rehab. Walmart is like 3.44 for 100 tabs or something.

Check your insurance. Do it before you go nuts and can't talk correctly or dial a phone.

We are blessed where I live that we have detox (though its shitty and I'm allergic to wool blankets). I'm sorry you don't have the access we do here.

[Tidegirl]

I don't have any Valium unfortunately. I do have the antihistamine . I may take some now. I've been trying to drink some decaf tea. As always the lack of sleep is killer. From experience I know that I won't sleep for several days and probably won't eat much. I think the worst thing is the anxiety. I've been beating myself up about every little thing.

[Orimus]

These are very helpful comments. I have talked to my husband but I feel like I am worrying him so much-- his dad has heart issues and his mom Alzheimer's -- they have basically run out of money and expect my husband to bail them out. The situation with my dad is concerning. He won't bathe or take his medications. We pay a caregiver and nurses to help him but he won't follow their direction. Please pray for me if you believe in God.

I can certainly appreciate the situation is tough lass and glad to see there is good communication between you and your husband. I do wonder if your husband feels you are worrying him too much and if it might not worry him a little less to see that you are taking massive action towards making things better such as going to a rehab and/or therapy? In terms of the financial pressures it usually helps me to sit down and put it on paper, everything coming in and everything going on. (If it's not on paper already) A financial adviser may also prove to be of benefit. Some links that might be useful in terms of caregiving as well as finances.

8 Benefits of Caregiver Support Groups - DailyCaring

Federal Aid Programs Help Family Caregivers, Caregiving Resources - AARP

How to Choose a Financial Planner - Personal Finance - WSJ.com

[empyr3al]

I don't have any Valium unfortunately. I do have the antihistamine . I may take some now. I've been trying to drink some decaf tea. As always the lack of sleep is killer. From experience I know that I won't sleep for several days and probably won't eat much. I think the worst thing is the anxiety. I've been beating myself up about every little thing.

You know that has made me wonder about our local detox. Coffee is available all the time and is essentially a staple but we also knock ourselves out with valium for like 12 hours initially and use whats called gravol here (dimenhydrinate, a shot in the butt). Its insanely expensive by brandname but if we ask the pharmacist its about a tenth of the cost for dimenhydrinate. My to be ex wife and I used to cross the border because it was so close and buy up motion pills by the multiple bottles. At that time we were addicted to dimenhydrinate for sleep so I know a bit about it. But its used so you can eat coming off severe alcohol. Mirtazapine is cheap and can help you sleep and get an appetite. Brandname is Remeron if people don't understand what mirtazapine is.

Diazepam (Valium) is used to put you to sleep but also to prevent siezure.

My father is addicted to Lorazepam which is 10 times more powerful by the mg. But short acting. Also to T3's which is codiene. But I am graceful enough to figure the fact and he does try to limit them. Understanding that with benzo's it may not be actually that you are in pain but you are actually in withdrawal as it escalates over time and you need more. Benzo's are a freaky product. Limit yourself to a month if you do get a script.

I too use tea all the time as a preference. Mine contains black tea so it has caffiene. Chai Tea to be precise. I found hard tap water difficult to handle at first, so products like kool aid or mio squirts worked well and continue to work well. Just expanding on what I previously said.

And yes I will pray.

[YouKayBee]

Has any body had this happen? I will feel awesome, so productive but every two weeks I will go down the rabbit hole. It's scary as I will lose 15 pounds during that time. I'm not even drinking much. I think it's that I'm drinking at all. My sister came this week and we have had a poor relationship since my mom passed. My dad is a maniac and he really upsets my 12 year old-- like to the point of extreme anxiety. The Deacon at church said I need to take care of my boy first. But I feel big time guilt about my dad. Guitaristas book was very helpful but not helpful enough I guess. Can anybody give me insight on therapy? I am doing it out patient but this is not working. This may wreck my marriage but I'm wondering if I should throw myself on my sword and go to rehab

You need to get and keep sober, that will enable you to look after others and yourself. It is quite possible to get straight without meds, drink plenty of water, eat good food, keep yourself warm and keep telling yourself you can do this. I also used the mantra of "everything is manageable so long as I don't drink", or "I'll be ok if I don't drink". You can make your own words which mean something to you.

[empyr3al]

@YouKayBee the reason I mention drugs is that the first 72 hours is insane and dangerous and depending on length of alc use sometimes you need something else. Cross addiction or substitution is nuts so I appreciate what you said. Mirtazapine seems the least crazy out of them all. Your mantra's make sense after the initial withdrawal.

[Tidegirl]

Thank you all. I have no medicine but I'm doing ok so far. Worried of course but was able to drive. Husband is playing sports as that is his stress relief. I think the thing that gets me is the comments about how I could die. ( previously-- not today) I've never had a seizure and I know logically I usually feel far better afet a day or two.we go to London in 2 weeks and o can't mess that up. People keep calling and honestly I only recall half of what was said. We have an appointment for our kitty next week and I cannot recall it at all. Will call tomorrow. I keep saying that I have to get everything in perspective. I can't believe my husband has not noticed how bad the past 2 days have been, my sister is upset as she sees me rarely . I would like to just hand off my dad to her but that is not the way it will work. Thank you for your comments.

[empyr3al]

Don't worry @Tidegirl ... if you are okay now you are fine and will not die. Indicators are sweats, nausea, and regurgitation to the point you are dehydrated. 10% is the average after hardcore abuse daily. Do not worry about how you can die because its not common anymore and you would have to be drinking like 40oz a day. Here if its neccessary we will give IVs of water in hospitals if you reach that point of dehydration. As you probably know alcohol dehydrates you.

You sound fine. Don't think about what I said as you might die. Its a warning. Thank God everyday as you get sober. So maybe some books or something you love to do to keep you preoccupied. Avoid things you loved to do while drinking for a while.

Still will pray for you. Sending you love and compassion because thats neccessary.