Is anyone available to help?

[Tidegirl]

Very anxious but trying to stay busy. Not drinking at least and that's a positive. This has got to be it for me. I can't keep on in this cycle. Did not go to ER because of having to sit there for so long-- I figured I'd be a wreck if that happened. Hoping to get some sleep at least tonight.

[Orimus]

@Tidegirl, your anxiety in and of itself will interfere with you getting sleep. Put your mind at ease and reach out to a medical professional - call your doctor or one of those support lines if you do not wish to go to the ER. Please do this for yourself and find some peace so that you can end this cycle. Not drinking is a great first step, this is follow through to build towards the non-drinking you.

[Tidegirl]

Thank you Orimus. I will call one of the numbers listed. It can't hurt and may help. This has become such a destructive pattern. I lose about 4 days a month and I can't keep on. My husband said I'd been requiring a lot of help for the last week and he was concerned. I did not have the heart to go into what happened when he was gone. I think he probably suspects what went on. We are 11 days from our trip to London and Dublin. I will not drink and ruin this! I'm going to get my rear to therapy every day to battle this anxiety that is causing me to lose my sobriety battle.

[JackieClaire]

Thank you Orimus. I will call one of the numbers listed. It can't hurt and may help. This has become such a destructive pattern. I lose about 4 days a month and I can't keep on. My husband said I'd been requiring a lot of help for the last week and he was concerned. I did not have the heart to go into what happened when he was gone. I think he probably suspects what went on. We are 11 days from our trip to London and Dublin. I will not drink and ruin this! I'm going to get my rear to therapy every day to battle this anxiety that is causing me to lose my sobriety battle.

Good for you, Tidy. They will not judge you they are there to help..........grab it with both hands.

@Orimus..............great list of numbers there and very helpful...........thank you.

[Tidegirl]

Thank you all. I'm just hanging in there as best I can.

[Lizann]

Just wondering how your doing today? Glad hubby is there with you. We are here for you, let us help. PM me if you like. I'll help anyway I can.

[Tidegirl]

Thanks so much. I am determined to stop this destructive cycle. Whatever it takes. Anxious still and getting sweats but think it will improve as days pass.

[empyr3al]

@Tidegirl Valium saved my life. I still have about 50, maybe 100 5mg pills on hand if things get crazy but I am not addicted to them, which is why I have so much because my GP knows what I am doing. Honesty is important. When i lapse, relapse I know exactly what to do, so I can do it at home. Takes a lot of practice.

As was said ER if you worried or have only done this a couple times before because it is not fun and not a joke. Rehab or our local detox will give you an insane amount of valium, like 60mg to 90mg to calm you down.

Because I am wary of Benzos (Valium), which I have a ton of and afraid of cross addiction, I have used an alcohol taper which is hard to manage self done and its up and down as I have done it under control before but I have to learn to do it myself. I know most object to that concept but its working. Addiction is a recurrent disease so its hard to manage. I have thousands of dollars in drugs to stop alcohol. When I stop one or another to try to be clean I end up relapsing.

72 hours complete clean is when it becomes clear. I know you altered that so taper as best you can.


And yes will pray for you again

[Tidegirl]

Not drinking at all all of today and most of last night. Except for the usual ridiculous worse case scenarios going through my mind-- I'm beginning to perk up. Sleep is always an issue when this happens. I won't be sleeping due to anxiety and I'll think oh lord-- I better my liver will go out ( not had any signs of it but you know where the mind goes). I'm afraid of benzos due to the potential of addiction but if I needed them I'd take them. I'm going to be in the therapist office everyday until we leave for London and Diblin in 11 days. I've never detoxed in a rehab, have stayed at home and I will say-- there are times when the sweats and nausea are too much-- not to mention the poo and inability to eat much. Thank you for your advice.

[JackieClaire]

@Tidegirl ..............rest when you can, love, even if your sitting or lying down its resting............you will get through this first week.........I don't often make promises here but as long as you don't drink I promise you'll be feeling well in a few days.............tired no doubt but a damned sight better than you did on Wednesday.

Oh and bananas..........excellent idea.

And keep those numbers close............bit like a security blanket.