December AA Thread

[retteacher]

Everyone:

This is a tough time of year for some of us who started out & ended up as social drinkers. I did drink socially but eventually turned into a solitary drinker. I don't have as much of a problem as some who drank in bars & at parties. We have 2 parties next week: one on Thurs. & one on Sat. There will be drinking at those parties, but now that I've gotten through quite a few such occasions, I'm not too worried...not that I'm complacent. I know that I could relapse at any time for any reason (or no reason).

I've been going to a lot of meetings...just about daily. I thank God they are there for us alcoholics. I've had a few challenges that I've had to work through. Today, we're going to a wake before the evening meeting. The young man who dies was one of us. He just couldn't stay sober/clean. Eventually, he died of this disease. It is so insidious.

I have much to be thankful for. We talked about it last night at our discussion meeting which was again about gratitude. I have a "design for living" that includes the 12 steps. I don't have to feel overwhelmed about problems today. I can use the 12 steps to solve them.

Take care one & all.

Mary

[retteacher]

December AA Thread

Hi Everyone: I just wanted to check in & boost this thread to the top. Last night's speaker was pretty wonderful. He was sober for a long time & had quite a story. I went to an AM meeting which was on step 6. I'm trying for a meeting a day. I find that it really grounds me. I hope all is well w/everyone out there. This is a tough time of year when the alcohol is flowing. I just have to remember that wo/my sobriety I don't have anything. Mary

[retteacher]

December AA Thread

Hope all is well w/everyone. Last week we went to 2 Christmas parties...both serving alcohol. I really didn't have a problem w/not drinking. At last night's party, there were some non-drinkers there...including my husband who just doesn't drink very much if at all. I know this is a tough time of year though. Lots of celebrations.

I hope everyone is coping OK. Mary

[Solitaire]

December AA Thread

We are very quiet this month?!
It is a sad week in South Africa with the passing of Nelson Mandela...
And, it could be a trigger for some of us to drink... He was such a huge figure in many lives!
It just reminds me again, that I could ALWAYS find a reason to drink: good news, bad news, no news...
We are going to have an open door on Christmas day, from 12:00 until 20:00, as we understand it could be a challenging day....
Hugs,
Sol xxx

[retteacher]

December AA Thread

Sol: There was much coverage of the memorial here in the U.S. I thought Pres. Obama did a nice job w/the eulogy. Take care...his legacy will live on.

There are Alcothons here in the states for 24 hours between Christmas Eve & Christmas Day...meetings back-to-back for 24 hours. I know many people who go to some or even all of those meetings. Our holidays were spent drinking in the past. Now, we have to find another way to celebrate the season. For me, it's so much more meaningful not to have to go to bed dizzy & sick & to wake up w/a hangover. What a gift! We'll be spending our Christmas w/our children & g-children. Also, we usually babysit the grandsons on New Year's Eve. That's our way of welcoming in the new year. It feels right to us.

I have a BB meeting tonight. Looking forward to it...even if it means going out into the frigid weather. Mary

[acadiaofmaine]

December AA Thread

Hi Mary,

Would love to be in touch with you. I finally joined AA about ten days ago. No one is more surprised than I am to have joined. I was intensely resistant to going, and I nearly had a panic attack during my first meeting (saw someone I knew there). In fact, I ran out after 20 minutes, completely breathless and scared.

But I went back. I had no other plan to follow, and I was clearly not getting sober by myself. The "just one won't hurt" voice never stopped yammering away, and one always lead to many. Many.

I had been seeing a therapist for a couple of months, who told me a couple of weeks ago that she was in recovery, and had been for 20+ years. I really liked working with her, so I decided to take the plunge. If it was ok for her to go to AA, who was I to be "above" it all? Especially when I was not getting any better?

Right now I am loving AA. I am shocked. But I do, and I have a sponsor, a woman I have known for 25 years! I had no idea she was in recovery until I saw her at a meeting. I am thrilled to be her sponsee, because I have always admired, liked, and looked up to her.

SO, onward. I am still trying to deal with the shame of all this. Not being able to stop on my own, and going to AA. This is a hard thing for me, but I'm working at it. And I'm making plans for the holidays, and letting people know I won't be drinking. I am hedging the truth with most of them, but at least they will not be surprised when I don't have a glass or 12 of wine.

Anyway, here we are.

Ann

[retteacher]

December AA Thread

Ann: What marvelous news! Your story echoes mine. I could not stop drinking on my own. I too had the "just one" or "maybe I'm not so bad" or "I'm not really an alcoholic" voice in my head yammering away. That voice kept me drinking for a long, long time.

I too was so scared, especially at my first few meetings. I saw plenty of people in meetings that I knew "outside." I still say: "Wow! She's an alcoholic?" when I see someone I didn't know was an alcoholic. I'm pretty sure there are folks that say that about me. I hid my drinking really, really well & was a highly functioning alcoholic.

Kudoes to your therapist who revealed her membership in AA. I don't tell everyone, but if I think it will help, I don't have a problem doing so. There's no shame in being in AA...that means we are doing something about our problem & healing physically, emotionally, & spiritually.

Please come to this thread & share. You don't have to have something profound to say. Just let us know about what you have learned at your meetings.

Good luck. Mary

[acadiaofmaine]

December AA Thread

Thank you, Mary. I will definitely share on this thread. I missed most of today's meeting, just heard a handful of "shares" after the speaker had finished-but tomorrow I will be there, and every week day at noon! It's a nice home group.

I am reading the Big Book, which is just fascinating. My sponsor said many people are critical of the book, as it was written in 1939 or so. Much has happened since then. But I am really enjoying it.

back to this tomorrow! Have a good night, everyone!

Ann

[retteacher]

December AA Thread

Ann: Yes, the BB gets much criticism for its "old-fashioned" writing & gender references. I would not want to see it changed to more modern wording, as it has worked for many years the way it is. That's just my opinion. I often go to a BB study group which goes over & over the first 164 pages. There is so much there. It truly is a manual for getting/staying/living. sober.

I'm leading tonight's meeting...a step 6 meeting. I do think that speaker meetings work best when you're new to the program. Regardless of how different the story is, there is always something to identify with. The saying is: identify don't compare. Once I start comparing, I begin to think maybe I'm not as bad as the person speaking. It leads to a drink.

Good luck. Mary

[acadiaofmaine]

December AA Thread

Mary, all the meetings I go to have a speaker. I thought they all did! This group has an 11th step meeting, an OD, and today is a beginner's meeting. They all seem pretty much the same to me, which I like! Heading off to one now. I agree about the comparing thing. I was pretty bad, but some of the speakers have really had a rough time. But there has not been a single person with whom I could not identify. That's the thing-on a basic, human level, we are all the same. Circumstances may differ somewhat, but at the core, I think we're very much alike.

Later.

Ann

[retteacher]

December AA Thread

Last night's step meeting was a good one. We also had a business meeting. There's always plenty of opinion at a business meeting, & I'm not sure a real newcomer would feel comfortable. But, we got some things done which I happy about.

mary

[retteacher]

December AA Thread

We read "The Doctor's Opinion" at last night's BB meeting. He describes the "phenomenon of craving" which is something that non-alcoholics do not have. I certainly had it. Once I started drinking I was powerless to stop. In the BB, Bill W. gives 2 criteria for alcoholism:
1. Wanting to quit drinking & being unable to do so.
2. Once an alcoholic starts drinking, he/she is unable to stop.

I said: "Today I'm not going to drink" only to find myself drinking later in the day. I did this countless times. I wanted to quit drinking but just could not do it on my own. I had to find AA in order to stop. MWO was instrumental in making me realize I had a serious problem. But, I couldn't stop wo/a face-to-face fellowship.

Have a great day. Mary

[bettygirl]

December AA Thread

me too mary...everyday when I was hung over so bad, I would vow not to drink that day...fast forward til I could get out of bed, and off I was to the store! so glad my life isn't like that anymore!

[retteacher]

December AA Thread

I've seen pamphlets that call alcoholism a merry-to-round. It was that for me. I couldn't get off & would just spin around in it constantly. If I wasn't drinking, I was thinking about it.

We have alcothons around here. These are continuous meetings for 24 hours back-to-back from Christmas Eve through Christmas Day. I think I'm going to try to get to one of the meetings. I don't think I'll be tempted on Christmas, as most of my family doesn't drink, but I'd like to experience the alcothon. We'll see.

Take care one & all.

Mary

[sunshine_gg]

December AA Thread

Hello ladies!

Yep to all of the above.

I've been to some awesome meetings in the past couple weeks and will help put together the women's group as an official AA group after Christmas. Very much looking forward to that.

Must run... be well and have a great day!