I need companionship and accountability and although the Newbie's Nest is inviting, accepting and compassionate, I need additional camaraderie with those who, like me, are not Newbies in the sense that we've done the stop start thing many times.
If you are a few days in, sick of the same old song and dance and really going to give it a go, then please join me as we try to do things differently this time. Obviously what we've been doing in the past hasn't been working.
I am a 56 year old woman and a wine drinker who constantly convinces myself I can moderate. I usually succeed for a while and then, like last night, I get drunk to the point of causing myself that 3:00 a.m. horrible wake up call where I feel my heart trembling and emotional remorse, etc. I don't hurt anyone or cause a scene but I get sloppy; you know the story...
I probably have the record here of the most AF starts and restarts. It is reassuring to know that AF Champs like Byrdie admit to having many also. But the madness must stop.
One thing that has changed is that I now admit that I do have past life experiences that warrant me wanting to escape into a bottle to hide from. This is big for me because, until recently, I have painted my past with a rose coloured brush, never admitting I use alcohol to escape.
Please hop on board and join me with daily posts about how you are doing and we will encourage each other.
Life has too much promise to mute the joy with booze. I WILL not change my signature line. April is the month I achieve sobriety. Period.
If you are a few days in, sick of the same old song and dance and really going to give it a go, then please join me as we try to do things differently this time. Obviously what we've been doing in the past hasn't been working.
I am a 56 year old woman and a wine drinker who constantly convinces myself I can moderate. I usually succeed for a while and then, like last night, I get drunk to the point of causing myself that 3:00 a.m. horrible wake up call where I feel my heart trembling and emotional remorse, etc. I don't hurt anyone or cause a scene but I get sloppy; you know the story...
I probably have the record here of the most AF starts and restarts. It is reassuring to know that AF Champs like Byrdie admit to having many also. But the madness must stop.
One thing that has changed is that I now admit that I do have past life experiences that warrant me wanting to escape into a bottle to hide from. This is big for me because, until recently, I have painted my past with a rose coloured brush, never admitting I use alcohol to escape.
Please hop on board and join me with daily posts about how you are doing and we will encourage each other.
Life has too much promise to mute the joy with booze. I WILL not change my signature line. April is the month I achieve sobriety. Period.
But I cannot tell you how many "day 1s" or "first AF weeks" I have had... And I am TIRED of it! I am DONE! I can't take this anymore... My body is starting to ache and I know that I am killing myself physically, spiritually and emotionally...I don't want AL to be the center of my life anymore... I read on another thread where someone called it a "substance in a glass"... That is SO true... I am wasting so many wonderful days on glasses of liquid! I am ready to fill that glass with something that is healthy - and that benefits me and the people I love... 
But if I hadn't done all those quits, where would I be today? Worse off than I am, for sure. Every day af is a gift.
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