Time to Change

[Shadowforest]

47 year old mum of older kids.

I have been heavy drinking for many years. Red wine is my poison of choice. A bottle barely touches the sides. Can easily polish off 2 or more.

Sick of the way I feel. Functioning with full time job etc

Decided to start this journal to keep track of what I'm drinking. Going to gradually cut down. Scared of withdrawal symptoms. Do t go a day without alcohol so ensure whether will get withdrawal or not.

Cut down starts today. Aim to be AF by 1st July.

I'm love running. I'm overweight so terribly slow. I want to cut the alcohol, lose the weight, focus on healthy eating and not come near last in a race.

Here goes.

[Guitarista]

You can do it Shadowforest. I'm just back from a trail run today actually. Near a big surf beach way out of town. Good feeling. You can do it. G

[available]

Hi Shadow and welcome. 51 year old mother of 4 grown up children. Used to be what i classified myself as a functioning alcoholic and now am sober and happy. Two plus night drinker of white wine. I only drank on days ending in a Y so i pretty well had everyday covered.

Now life is great.

We all withdraw differently so do what you think is best for you. I stopped one day and just decided to let my body heal slowly and one day at a time. I knew in myself if i kept on drinking it would justify myself to just keep it up especially if i was stressed which seemed to be a major trigger for me.

The newbies nest is a great place to pop in and get to know others. Lots of great threads to read to keep you motivate.

[Eloise]

Hey Shawdow!! 48 over here, almost 2 years sober and want to reiterate You Can Do This!! And, it is worth it!!
I am still listening to the Bubble Hour podcasts, they really sealed the deal for me... gave me soooo many reasons why the only sensible option was to stop drinking.
They also made me realize that drinking too much is not the sign of a bad character. We are not horrible people, we just developed a drinking problem. Good for you for recognizing it is time handle the situation!

[Shadowforest]

Well last night had 5 large glasses wine. One glass short of 2 bottles.

Did make it out for a hungover 10k run this morning. Slow one.

Not beating myself up about the wine. That the most I am going to have.

Going down from now.

[lex]

shadowfest- good luck with this but it might be a good idea to bite the bullet and get in, say, 30 days AF. Listen, if you can run a 10k with a hangover surely you can notch up 30 days! Good luck either way!!

[Shadowforest]

I would love to. In 18 months I've only managed 1 day AF. not sure if can and scared of withdrawal symptoms. May be I read too much about DTs but have had a close friend die of DTs.

I ran a marathon last year while drinking heavy during training. I can run and drink. I'm slow. I'm fat cos I drink too much. What can I achieve if I don't drink. I'm not just doing it for running though. I want to be healthy.

[Byrdlady]

Hey Shadow and welcome!

None of us here are doctors, so all we can do is share what worked for us. For ME (and this is just ME), whenever I tried to taper off and EASE into it, I just didnt get anywhere....here's the thing, I started out with intentions of not having as much that day, but once I had a couple, my judgement was impared so off I went. I evenually just went cold turkey. I drank a liter (bottle and a half) a day, much more on weekends. I didnt have any DT's but you can expect to be anxious, after all, we aren't getting our fix. The taper is a good idea in theory, but if we could control this thing, we wouldnt be here. Cold turkey is actually more humane than the constant feeling of deprivation and impending doom of the taper. All of this is my opinion, and you know what they say about those!

I let the FEAR of quitting keep me from actually doing it for years. The thoughts of it are much worse than the reslity. Today, I feel so blessed to be free of AL's pull.

We are glad you're here! 2 good links in my signature line! All the best, Byrdie

[Shadowforest]

Stopped at one bottle of wine tonight. Now drinking tea. Now that's an achievement. Seriously considering quitting altogether rather than tapering.

[Shadowforest]

Same again. After a boot camp fitness session found bottle of wine. Wanted to continue but stopped and had tea so proud of myself. Xx

[Shadowforest]

It's so much nicer to 'feel' bedtime rather than to collapse in a drunken stupor ��

[lex]

I'm still thrilled about not going to bed groggy, and not waking up at 3 am feeling anxious, every night- and I've been sober for over a year now. In hindsight, having a few drinks every evening before dinner-which i did for some 30 years-was just plain stupid! Oh well live and learn.

[SKendall]

I agree Shadow. I become optimistic when we have a newcomer b/c we get to experience them gaining a better life. There will be bumps along the way but it is all so worth it. Tapering might work for you and you may want to ask for medical help and if not you can buy an anxiety reliever OTC called Calm's Forte or google supplements for insomnia, anxiety, etc.

Good Luck

[treetops]

That's great that you cut down on the wine Shadow. I was a very heavy drinker for many years but quit 3 and a half years ago. I agree with others that it is easier to quit than to try to taper. Too easy to finish an opened bottle of wine. I am always careful about offering advice because we are all different when it comes to withdrawal symptoms and you don't want to put yourself in danger.
When I first quit there was some sweating and headaches - nothing dangerous. but mostly it was crankiness and insomnia. This passed although I will always be a light sleeper. I lost a ton of weight and the puffiness from drinking. My health greatly improved and mentally I am so much better. Well well worth it.
Anyway keep posting and we will try to support you through this.

[Shadowforest]

Thanks for kind words everyone. I keep thinking if I get my drinking down to a lower level then quit, the withdrawal won't be so bad, but not sure if it works like that.

I'm up fretting in the middle of the night. I have a lot to fret an]bout. Nothing serious. Just lots of issues giving me grief.