Newbies in need - Day 19

[retteacher]

Hi Everyone: I'm up early and starting this wonderful thread. As the alcoholic haze lifts, I realize more & more about myself. The other day I was out w/my husband when we saw a gaggle of women (girlfriends) out having fun together. He said, "Why don't you do that?" I realized that I have no friends to do that with because I've isolated myself so much. Alcohol has been my best friend. It's something to do when I'm bored. I'm an introvert by nature, so drinking alone lends itself to my personality. I make social plans in my job as "the good wife," but I haven't done anything w/women friends in ages. Since I've been sober for 9 days & my thinking is starting to clear up, I went home & thought the whole thing through. I then got on the phone & called some friends that I had taught with for 25 years & asked them over for a pot-luck brunch. It was harder than I thought to make those calls. Anyhow, everyone was very receptive, & I feel now I'm taking another step into the land of the normal. Thank you all so much for being here. I could never have done this wo/you all. Mary

[Doggygirl]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Good morning Mary! Wow I just love reading your posts, and that one actually brought a tear to my eye. And I ain't no crybaby!! I just feel like I'm watching you emerge from your cocoon as a beautiful butterly. I'm glad I arrived here in time to watch that. I'm so happy for you, and you give me and I'm sure many others hope that we too can emerge from our lonely alcohol filled cocoons and build the lives we want and deserve. WOW Mary!! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and insights. And HAVE FUN at your pot luck brunch!!

Well, no grass growing under these feet, at least not yesterday or today. My reward for quitting smoking, which I did not quite 5 months ago, was that I could get a cleaning lady with the money I was saving. That's been one indulgence I've treated myself to for most of my adult life. I gave that up when Mr. Doggy and I started our own business a few years ago, and have really been missing it!! Even though that was our deal, I was hesitant to spend the money. But now that I've quit drinking too, it was time. So Laura will be here at 8AM (less than 10 minutes!!) to do a Big Cleaning and help me get this place back on track. Having that help again is GREAT incentive to stay far, far away from the BoozeBeast. WHEE!!! Housework haters eat your hearts out!! (just kidding...but a great way to spend the money you are saving if it's important to you!!)

I'm very happy to be on Day 9 and I'm really JAZZED about hitting double digits. Still having a little trouble sleeping but it's getting better. I'm a bit bummed that my weight isn't doing much of anything considering I dumped 1,000 - 1,500 calories a day that I used to drink up. But...I've had a couple decent food days - no sugar and low carb and reasonable calories, so I'm going to trust the Great Pumpkin to take some of this fat off my big butt. I choose to keep that in perspective though. First things first. Stay solid in my nicotine quit, and get solid in my alcohol quit. One step at a time on the way to the improved ME!

Hope everyone is having a great day. ((((((Hugs for those who need them))))) Kicks in the pants for those who need them. Dusing off of britches for those who need that. And best of all CONGRATULATIONS for every little victory in the war against the BoozeBeast, no matter how small that little victory might seem. If we win enough battles we can win the war, right?

Off to the drink tracker to collect my gold star!!

DG
Day 9 AF * * * * * * * * * (gold stars)

[nattie]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Hi Retteacher & Doggygirl,
Good to hear you're both enjoying your AF days. Day 4 for me, which I have managed before if I put my mind to it, but am trying to keep going this time.

I feel better but today I have a horrible neuralgia type pain down one side of my face. I've experienced this before & usually had a glass( x4) of wine in the evening to numb it !
Am currently writing myself a list of what I would like to do this weekend, just small things like a have some plants getting pot bound that need to go in the garden. Am hoping to whip this out of my pocket this coming weekend when I feel the need to drink, maybe distract myself. I am alo looking for a local meditiation class as I feel this might help too.

Doggygirl.......I would love to have your cleaner - I have really let my house slip - not in a dirty way but just clutter all over the place & little motivation to do anything about it before. I remember having a 6 month AF period about 6 years back & it was my first christmas with no drink. THere I was on Christmas eve cleaning the windows, washing the net curtains, etc, etc while everyone else drank. Here's hoping that comes back to me this time around.

Retteacher - I hope you have a lovely lunch with your friends - I too stopped seeing mine, wither it would interfere with my night of getting trashed or I would look so awful if it was a morning meet up I was worried someone would say "god, rough night??"
Hope its a success

xx

[Almostfamous]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Teacher and Doggy- you posts are SO inspriational. I have been lurking for a while and have been visiting more frequently. reteacher-It is hard to step out of your comfort zone and you reached out and planned a potluck- great work! Doggy- amazing that you quit smoking. Great work! I am not a smoker but my Dad quit 3 years ago and it was the best gift he gave to himself and our family.

We moved out of state last year and my drinking escalated. I have become a moderate drinker since May (2-4 drinks 5 times a week) but am working on more af days and less drinks on days I do drink. I will be 40 at the end of the year and want to give my liver and the rest of me of big gift of better health and mind. My butt is looking more like a billboard than a butt these days so I hope excersize and less alcohol will help with that.

I will be checking this site often. Keep up the good work and thank you!

[nancy]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Mary, things seem to keep getting better for you and I am so happy for that.

Doggygirl, keep going!

[Doggygirl]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Nattie, congratulations on hitting Day 4 AF! You sound really good today except for the pain in your face - I hope that goes away. Another thing I did that I think really helped was do a lot of writing before I found MWO about why I want to give up the alcohol. I have lists of things alcohol has robbed me of, etc. My list of postitive reasons to drink is well...pretty much empty. Usually when I want to drink it's because my brain is craving that tipsy feeling - and that's about it. So maybe a list of the reasons you DON'T want to drink to compliment your list of things you want to do might help.

Mean time, I'm going to steal YOUR good idea about making a short list of things I want to do this weekend. Sometimes I tend to plan in to grand a way for too long of a time frame. So I'm going to make a short list for my pocket too.

Happy Days!!!!!!

DG
Day 9 AF * * * * * * * * *

[retteacher]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Dear DGirl: I'm so glad I've given you food for thought. You sound like one sassy lady. I love that in women, as I'm somewhat serious & thoughtful. I love persnicketiness in women, because I was raised to be quiet & well-mannered. This has been my downfall in some ways, because the reason I started drinking so much was to loosen up a little. It just escalated from there. I'm learning that I can have fun wo/getting drunk. Love, Mary

[Taking Control]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Mary,
I can really relate to the isolation and the lack of girl friends. It hurts more now that I am trying to dump my best friend Winey. I am trying to get up the nerve to call an old friend who's son is recovering from cancer, and another childhood friend that recently lost her husband in an auto accident. I really don't know what to say to either of them, but I need to break the ice (or rather isolation).

I am 8 days AF, 1 Mod. Every morning I journal all the positives of the previous day being AF. That seems to help me keep on track.


TC

[Doggygirl]

Newbies in need - Day 19

****Waving to Almostfamous (LURVE that name - what are you almost famous for? Something really cool I bet!) and Nancy****

Nancy thanks as always for your daily encouragement! It sure means a lot - from everyone here.

Let's see. A good abbreviation for Almostfamous is AF. How cool is that? May I call you AF for short??? LOL on your butt as a billboard. I bet my billboard is bigger than your billboard nanny nanny boo boo! I too am hoping upon hope that dumping the booze cals helps me in that regard. Quitting smoking was tough - I kid you not. One of the reasons I KNOW I will never, ever smoke again even if I'm tethered to a house on fire is I WILL NOT EVER go through that first couple of months EVER again. I quit about 15 years ago and made it 6 months. Then I fell for the biggest, nastiest, meanest Nicodemon lie their is...that little voice in the head saying "now we're not addicted anymore. If we're reeely reeeely careful we can smoke just one every now and then....." Go directly to jail, do not pass go, do no collect $200. Right back to 2 packs a day within a week. Repeat. Not goin' there again - Stupid Man Step In Same Hole Twice.

Seriously, the mental toughness I had to employ to get me through quitting smoking is REALLY helping me here. It's been much easier to accept that I dont' want to drink any more (no matter how appealing the thought of moderation might be...). Treating each day AF as a victory - and taking on a mind set that drinking even for one day would mean giving up all those days I worked hard to get... I'm glad to have such a tough mind set ingrained in me at this point. I think it makes this easier - like I've had some practice before, even though it was with a different vice. Anyway....AF, please tell your Dad congratulations from me. I know how hard it is, and he DID give a huge gift to your family and to himself. Well done - I hope to be there too in a few years.

Mary - LOL I got the Big Rebellious (sp) Gene, that's for sure. At times in life it has served me well, and at other times not so much. But it's our experiences in total - the good and the bad that make us who we are. I hope we ALL end up free of these balls and chains - whether that's AF or Mods - just think how STRONG we will be with all of our extra Learning Opportunities we've had. Look out world!!!!! Mary, when is your pot luck?

I was watching City Confidential last night. It was an Aspen Colorado episode - oh the lives of the rich and famous. A famous skier from the late 60's / early 70's nick named Spider (was on the /68 US Olympic team) was sadly, murdered by his girlfriend. Very sad. A guy who was interviewed talked about Spider's zest for life. He said of Spider "He drank life from a full cup." I loved that saying. I want to drink life from a full cup!!!!!

OK - nuff babbling for now. I really :h you all and the MWO program!! FREEDOM!!

DG
Day 9 AF Loud and Proud

[retteacher]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Whew! I just experienced a close one! I stopped into my local supermarket for something I needed. It has a wine aisle. My husband is very busy & out of the house. Bad combination for me! I considered buying my favorite pinot grigio, but:
-I'm on day 10 & I'd break my streak.
-I'd have to 'fess up to all of you at MWO (this is the only place I'm 100% honest).
-I'd have to alter my activities for the rest of the day (no way I'd be able to stop at 2 or 3).

I'm figuring that if I go in & out of that store 21 times wo/wine, the habit of buying a bottle will be broken. I know I can't get complacent, but I also can't avoid alcohol triggers. They're everywhere. Anyhow, the urge is passing, & I'm so glad I resisted.

Love you all, Mary

[Doggygirl]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Taking Control - congrats on 8 Days AF WHEE!! and 1 day Mods WHEE!! Love your screen name too. I hope you are able to get in touch with your friends. I bet they can both use all the support they can get right now.

Mary, I think there is something to be said for "controlled practice" dealing with stuff we will have to deal with as we move forward. I think too much avoiding leaves us vulnerable. At least that's the way I feel about the smoking quit. The more I force myself to get used to being in places where smoking takes place but I don't light up, or that cigarettes are for sale and I don't buy any, the easier it gets to deal with over time. I'm pretty sure this will be quite similar. And good for you facing down the BoozeBeast in the grocery store!!

DG
Day 9 AF * * * * * * * * *

[Almostfamous]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Doggy- Af works for me : )
My Dad said her couldn't quit again either. He is the world's greatest and he was not an enjoyable person for a year- I swear. I figure if he can quit then I can get more control of my life. Funny thing is people don't even know that I have a problem. I have enjoyed beverages since I went off to college at 17 and it has only turned into a rotten habit the last 7 years or so. I have hid my habit fairly well but am not fooling myself anymore. I plan on munching kudzu like chips and keep my jogging for mental health. And my billboard could win prizes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!

[Doggygirl]

Newbies in need - Day 19

AF my Dad is 75 and he finally quit smoking 3 years ago - said it's the hardest things he's ever done too. Mr. Doggy quit smoking about 2.5 years ago. I guess quitting is in the air around here so might as well clean out the closets. Mr. Doggy would say "I managed my drinking pretty well." And what he also means by theat is "considering the volume." I went steadily down the slope too from 17 or 18 on to 49. I rarely blacked out or anything. I became a steady sipper (and by steady, I mean glass in hand at all times). "noon somewhere" started getting WAY too early. So here I am and quite happy about that!! Very grateful I found this site and program.

Our butts won't be big forever, so how 'bout this for some short term $$. Let's auction our butt billboard space on e-bay. Can't speak for you - but MY big butt won't win any prizes like the chicks who have sold their well toned flat tummy space for advertising. HOWEVER - It would sure get noticed and that's what advertising is all about, right?

OH just imagine what we can do with all this coin we're gonna make!!!

Have a great day!!

DG
Day 9 AF * * * * * * * * *

[Almostfamous]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Dog- HILARIOUS! I am all in. I see major coinage in my future. I am hoping all this cutting back will provide a less foggy firmer me. I am on day 2 of no alcohol. I just went and swallowed the supplemnts. This is usually my witching hour. I am a 3-5 p.m. drinker and am feeling good again today. Whew! May our selling begin : )

[Doggygirl]

Newbies in need - Day 19

Hee Hee. See what you started with your billboard comments there AF???? Anybody else want to get in on the ground floor of this new and exciting business venture?

AF, do you feel really good about not drinking today? I sure do. It's 3:12PM in my town, and normally I'd be VEREE tipsy by now. WHAT A TURNAROUND. Doesn't sound like much, but I'm thinking about getting to the bank before they close at 6PM, and then doing some shopping after that. In the past I would freak out if I had to go anywhere after Noon as that meant I couldn't start drinking as early as I wanted to. What a change to know that I can drive wherever I want, whenever want to. **note to self remember you already spent your extra coin on cleaning lady - do not start shopping a bunch** How cool is that??? FREEDOM ROCKS!!!!!

Hope everyone we haven't heard from yet is having a great day. In 45 minutes, I will officially complete the 9th 24 hour period booze free, and officially be a double digiter. WHEE!!!!

DG
Day 9 AF * * * * * * * * *