Newbies in Need - Day 19

[Cinders]

Good Morning to all Newbies :h

I am feeling absolutely fantastic this morning!! Two full days sober, two full nights sleep and lots and lots of optimism and resolve bundled all together.

I know, I know, been here done that a few times but this time "feels" different. So many of my friends here to help me along and so many newbies to jump on this train. What a ride we can have.

Let's go!!

As Beatle said in my Fear thread - Baby Steps and Baby Successes.

Hope all have a wonderful day and meet their goals whatever they may be.

Cindi

[rustop61]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Good morning Cindi and all to come.

2 Days is absolutely fantastic, you should be so proud of yourself. It is great to wake up every morning without a hangover and feel fresh. I'm on Day 19 and unfortunately the hangover feeling is only a memory now so little thoughts of treating myself to a glass of wine are entering my head. Yesterday evening was really hard. Some days I feel I have this thing beat and then wham it hits me again. It's an ongoing battle. Thank God for these boards, all that kept me going last night was the thought of completing my 30 Days. Anyway today is another day and hopefully will be easier.

Rustop

[evergreen]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Good morning all,

I am posting for the first time in over a month. I have had so many "fits and starts!" . . . stringing a couple of AF days together only to fall off and fall off hard!! I get so frustrated with myself. When I am failing I find it harder to share. However I have just completed my 6th AF day the longest stretch in quite a while. I was going to say I am hopeful but hopeful seems too passive a word as if I am hoping that change will happen to me rather than I will affect change. Let's just say that I am more optomistic than I have been in a long while. I would like to say that I am shooting for 30 days but looking too far ahead always gets me in trouble. I am going for one week . . .that would be today!! I have to keep my guard up. It is often when I reach for that glass without thinking almost robotically that I slip up!!

Thank you all for being here! We can do this together!!

[Cinders]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Evergreen,

Perhaps you can shoot for one week plus one day.

Mary and Starlight keep reminding us it is "one day at a time" and they have both proven that seems to work.

We can do this!!

(Like you, I am a good starter...)

Cindi

[satori]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Cindi,

You may have turned the corner!

I too woke up one day - after being here a few months, and felt "different" too!
I felt like I just couldn't be bothered with all the stress and hassle drinking caused any more.

Since then - I have been AF - with no real problems apart from the odd fleeting craving - and I can usually dispel these fairly quickly now.

Today is day 63 for me.

Hope this is the start of a new you too!

Love :l

Satori

xxx

[Guest]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Hi Cindi, Rustop, evergreen, Satori and all to come.

Cindi.........love the enthusiasm........it really is infectious. Glad you`re doing so well.......am with you every step of the way.

Rustop........the temptation is always there, but we just have to remind ourselves where we used to be, courtesy of the drink.

evergreen, I`m so happy for you with your 6 days. Think looking to far ahead does set us up for failure........goal for the 1st wk, then you`ll find yourself looking forward to having 2 AF wks. I can relate to your thinking........I had so many "false starts" before I really got to grips with my drinking. And yes, it really does help once we finally acknowledge that we have to "make it happen". Please don`t feel you can`t post if you slip..........come here often.....it`s the trying that matters.........I come to the boards every single day.......the site is my safety net.

Definitey Satori..........the "stress and hassle" we can well do without...........life is just so much more simple now.

Have a wonderful day, my friends.

Much love,

Starlight Impress x

[Finding My Self]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Absolutely....I come here too... 115 days but I still have days (like today!) when I feel, well, weird! Hormones (sorry guys!) I think but I just want something ...intangible.

But then I think would I want to fill this space with booze? And the answer's definitely no. (As you say, it doesn't help and just where did it lead before!!)

So, now what? All I can think is that I shall sit with this feeling and see if I learn anything. Today I am learning to deal with the feeling of, What is this all for? 115 days...so now what?! Where's my prize? Where's my new life/man/income/home?!??! (Looks really funny when you type it out!! Daft!)

So, I laugh, feel very grateful to you guys and for feeling 'not hungover or drunk' and very grateful for being alive while I wait (?!) to see what's next....

(But I still want to 'push the river' ..... I really do!)

Love to all and as the days mount up be proud...be VERY proud! It IS worth it. I might not know a few things to day but that's going to be the case every day being human but I used not to know ANYTHING!!! (Booze = blah!)

FMF xx

[retteacher]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Hi Everyone: What a wonderful thread today! Cindi, I'm right w/you. I feel clean & clear w/no issues hanging over my head. That's important to my sobriety. Right now, I feel full of resolve, but I'm realistic enough to know that those drink thoughts will probably creep in at some point. Before my slip, I asked about drinking thinking at the long-term abs forum, & I was advised to remember all the minuses of drinking:
-hangovers & black-outs
-guilt & remorse
-hiding & sneaking drinks
-etc.
I absolutely must realize that drinking is not a reward for me. It's something I must completely eliminate from my life. The normal drinkers in my life don't have to count or control their drinking. In long-term abs, they said that if you have to control or count your drinks then you've got a problem. Normal drinkers don't go home from a party & say: "I only had 2 drinks tonight." They have a built-in "stop" switch (which I don't have) that automaticlly goes on when they've had enough (for me, there's never enough until I'm pretty bad off).

I'm finding out from last Sunday's drinking bout that there's no escape from life. If I don't work through issues & difficulties, I won't be comfortable in my own skin (as someone on another forum put it). Being comfortable w/myself is essential to my sobriety.

Thank you for listening. I love each & every one of you. Mary

[Cinders]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Mary,

The way you handled your slip was a great example to all of us.

I notice too many people who are doing so well then suddenly disappear. Often they come back many weeks later to start all over again.

You did it the SUCCESSFUL way. You slipped, you analyzed, you jumped right back in the saddle and said, "OK, off we go!!"

You are such an inspiration.

We will always listen to you because you are worth listening to. Thank you for being you. :h

Love you,
Cindi

[Guest]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Yes Mary.........you treated your slip as the mere wee hiccup it was.........must be so easy to just carry on drinking after a slip, but you didn`t............shows your unflinching commitment, Mary. I admire you greatly.

Much love,

Starlight Impress x

[retteacher]

Newbies in Need - Day 19

Star & Cindi: There's no way I could have done this wo/both of you. You're the greatest! We're in this together. Mary