Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

[retteacher]

Hi Everyone: Last night I read some of my early threads from my archive. I joined MWO in April & really struggled w/becoming AF throughout the spring & summer. It was interesting to see how I gradually gave up on the idea that I could drink normally. I absolutely know that some of us here can moderate, but I just can't. When I tried to have one drink, it just didn't work...I drank a whole bottle.

The AF days I had here & there were leading up to a real change which took place on Oct. 6 when I said (w/real conviction): "That's it...I'm stopping!" Some of us can come to MWO & give up drinking right from the get-go. But others of us have to stumble around for a while until we're really ready. Reading my early posts really enabled me to understand what the newbie goes through in giving up the old lifestyle.

Please, please, please don't ever feel you can't come to MWO & explain about a slip you might have had. The one thing I did right was to come back here after a slip & report on it (over & over...embarrassing as that was at the time). What I got from all of you was support, love, & encouragement. That's how I got to where I am today.

MWO was the single most important discovery that happened to me in 2007 & the many previous years that I was abusing alcohol. Thank you. Mary

[Diamond7]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

Thank you for sharing that Mary. I need all the inspiration and success stories I can find right now as this old habit is nagging at me night and day but I REFUSE to yield again. Stubbornness has it's advantages :H .

This place and all of you are my lifeline and I can't put into words how grateful I am to have found you. Love to you all!

[rustop61]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

Hi Mary and all to come

Thank you for sharing that with us Mary. I must do the same thing one of these days. MWO has certainly been a journey for me, one that I am still on and quite enjoying it at the moment. I did 30 Days when I first joined and then went back moderating but really just went back to my old ways. I then stayed away from the boards for over a year. I still logged on the odd time and read but did not join in. I became involved again in September and did 30 days, 29 days in October, 30 days in November and moderated in December. Back again AF in January and am now on Day 10. I can moderate socially as I proved to myself over the holidays and can even enjoy a few glasses with hubby. Its the drinking alone and slipping back into the routine of drinking daily that I need to avoid.

Being AF has become easier and easier so thats the route I want to follow. Thanks for all the help along the way.

Rustop

[jane jane]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

Yes, indeed, Mary---well said! I feel just as you do, grateful for this forum and resolved on a life of abstinence, becoming someone who simply "does not drink," pure and simple, the same way I just "don't eat meat" or "don't snow ski." A choice, not a big heavy issue. My goal is to not even have to think about it daily, the way I don't have to think about avoiding pork, beef, or chicken. A way of life, as natural as breathing.

Big talk, as I'm only on Day 9 this go-round, but something feels different this time. I can't explain it, but something finally clicked. I don't resent those who can drink normally any more...I'm not going to over-analyze it and study my navel about "why"...just, not going to drink, ever, period.

So, all of you who think that repeated failure means it can never happen---you're wrong! It really CAN, but it does take stubbornness, pride, self-love, and sometimes just plain using your noggin when you think, "well, just one glass won't kill me."

[hart]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

Hi Mary, Diamond, Rus, Jane Jane.

Well I am a meat lover, but I'll join you about the no snow skiing. I am sick of the snow. I am feeling depressed anyway and I want SUN. I looked at getting a lite box as Kathy suggested but it $200+ and it hasn't been a good couple of months.

blahhh enuf. I'm on day 4 AF. Some say this is one of the hardest. I sure as heck hope so 'cause the last three haven't been so damn easy! Last time it was a breeze. Maybe it's the weather (it was summer before) maybe I'm just crouchy, but I can't seem to break out of it!!! I've been going to bed about 8:30-9pm. I've been taking sleeping pills. It's that or cry. I have a doc apptmt next monday to see if he can change meds. I hate going to him because he lectures.

I don't know. Maybe if someone sent me George Clooney I would snap out of it. I have a by from my hubby that if George Clooney comes knocking I get a free pass to be with him. Anyone want to help poor lil ole me out of my depression and set this up? I promise not to disappoint George. :thanks:

[Determinator]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

Happy Thursday ABeroonies!

gotta make it quick this am fraid to say.

Hart, you can change your lightbulbs in your house to the kind that are more like natural sunlight....might help a little.
I'll PM you some thought on depression...hang in there hon! I know depression blows donkey.

be well everyone!!

[Diamond7]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

Hart,

I'll reiterate what Determinator said, you can change your lights to ones that mimic sunlight, it's called 'full spectrum' lighting. It does make a difference in mood, especially in the winter months when there's less daylight and a lot of dreariness. I know someone that's in the business and will look into where you can pick them up and let you know.

Also, this is just a little trick that works wonders for me when I'm depressed. We keep a library of DVD's that we've seen that made us laugh...whenever I'm feeling down I sit and watch them till I'm rolling in the floor laughing and it helps sooooo much. I also take St. John's Wort and use a cream called 'Restored Balance' which naturally restores hormonal balance to help keep my moods/depression in check.

Congrats on day 4, same day for me and I feel the same, this is dammed hard but I'm only concentrating on getting through today right now so hang in there with me OK?

Sorry I can't help with George lol, but hubby may want to rethink that offer....rumor is George is a fantastic lover .

:l

[universal]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

I love GEORGE!!!!

Hart, I'm feeling it too...........Mary thank you so much for your words.........I have been here since November and although I have had more AF days since - (since November almost 30) I am still struggling........I think for me it may be a slower process, but one I am determined to do. I will not be upset - those AF days I had never had before and I am proud of them..........I will continue to try...

[jane jane]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

Day 9 here, and yes, Day 5 was indeed the worst (so far!) Now, why, I wonder? I think it may be that the body begins to feel so frisky and cleansed about then, and a wee little voice whispers, "You're okay now! Have a cool glass of something as a reward!" DON'T. Give it at least a full week. By yesterday I'd really forgotten to think about it (much) and today has been even easier. I know it's early days, but I have to hope and pray it stays this way.

[treeman]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

day 9...the evil weekend is lurking....plan is in place...told anyone coming over for the games that i wasn't drinking....some said that they wouldn't either so that i didn't feel any pressure....

now planning a delicious menu.....

still af this year...

[Senex]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

hello all, day 13 for me. I think thats supposed to be unlucky. Nah.

treeman - there's no evil in weekends - just enjoy. I really flipped out about New Year's Eve Parties, but I went and didn't drink and it was actually pretty enjoyable. It is all what you make of it. If you have good friends, the drinks don't matter so much.

I feel good to be at 13 days; mood is definitely settling down; if only work would follow suit. It's crazy busy, and I'm used to relaxing with a bourbon on the rocks after a day like this, but its really not so bad to resist. I know where that'll lead. I hope I can keep it up, and if I slip off have the ambition to try again.

take care.

[vinophile]

Thurs. - Jan. 10 - Daily Thread

Happy Thursday Abstainers,
I've enjoyed reading posts over the past several days but haven't posted much. I've been down with a throad/tonsil infection that I can't seem to shake. I have remained AF but mostly through default rather than courage and determination.
You all seem to be doing quite well and I certainly will agree with Mary when she says that we should never been ashamed to come back after a relapse. So many times I have made the decision to (re)quit because I know I can come back here and find the support I need to continue not drinking.
I look foward to our continued success.
Have a good night.

Janet