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FallenAngel
March 7th, 2008, 07:47 PM
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tlrgs
March 7th, 2008, 07:58 PM
hi there..fallenangel.. welcome this is a great place for surport. and if you want chat check out the chat room . and great job on 7 months . good luck and enjoy yourself

Victory
March 7th, 2008, 08:35 PM
WOW Congratulations

Hello FallenAngel, :welcome:
7 months is just fantastic and quit the ciggies too!!! :goodjob:
Wow you must be feeling so proud of yourself.
Hope to see you around the boards. Aunty Vic

FallenAngel
March 7th, 2008, 08:40 PM
Thanks so much for the welcome! Just trying to find my way around the site right now, but I will certainly be joining you guys in chat one of these days... and then you'll never be able to shut me up! LOL

FallenAngel
March 7th, 2008, 09:08 PM
tkeene;286809 wrote: I physically cannot handle it any longer, even 3 glasses of wine make me feel lousy for days, so I am fortunate in that respect. Now I just have to learn to be a sober person after 30+ years of daily drinking. t.
Thanks for the welcome t!
I'm not sure if I'm posting correctly so that you will be notified of my reply (just trying to find my way around here right now! lol)
I'm 49 & started drinking on a regular basis probably when I was around 16..some years heavier than others. I had the "bar" years, and then got tired of that scene, so my drinking mainly took place at home the last 10 years. We started making our own wine about 7 years ago (vodka used to be my choice of poison). The thing with making our own wine was that there was always something in the house to drink... and more likely than not, when I came home from work there was an opened bottle in the fridge... and hey! .... that looked pretty good to wind down with after a long day....but d@mn.... the bottle would be empty before I had my quota....so another bottle would get opened... and this would little scenario would continue day after day. *sigh*
As I wrote in another thread this evening... after I quit drinking, I poured a 5 gallon carboy of wine down the drain just to make a statement! lol My hubby was gone that weekend & wasn't too sure what to make of my new attitude... I have "stopped" drinking before for a month or so, but this is the first time I have "quit". When I would stop drinking for a specific amount of time in the past, it was always to try & break myself of the daily habit of drinking. More than anything, I would love to have the occasional drink, especially on those special times like birthdays & anniversaries. But what I have found time & time again, is that once I go back to drinking, it only takes a few short weeks & I'm back to my regular routine. That's when I realized that it's harder for me to moderate my drinking than to abstain completely. I can't say that being completely sober has been easy, there's a lot of emotional work to be done to be a content ex-drinker, and that's what I'm working on right now. 49 years old & I'm just starting to know the real me.... and so is everyone else (and I think I scare the hell out of them more NOW that I'm sober!!! LOL)

K.

Thankful
March 7th, 2008, 09:14 PM
Fallen Angel, welcome!

You will find that many here have also lost friends when they became sober. I think that is so sad, but it is what it is.

My oldest friend in the world has been kind of busting my chops about quitting because that's pretty much all we did when we got together. I stopped talking to him for a while and he got the hint that I was not going to listen to anything negative. He would throw in the occassional "good for you", "proud of you", but I think deep down he didn't think I would make it or that I wasn't really serious about it. Well, he called me Wed after a bad weekend and said "I think you have the right idea. I think I'm going to join you in being AF". I was so happy because he has had a bad bout w/depression and low self-esteem for years. I think giving up the booze is just what he needs. All I can do is listen and encourage, but never preach. I wish more people had this experience with their friends instead of losing them all together.

You will find a lot of friends here. We are always here for each other.

Congrats on your 7 months and giving up the cigs. Those are some major life changes. You should be very proud of yourself. Great job!

Love, Me
:l

FallenAngel
March 7th, 2008, 09:21 PM
Victory;286811 wrote:
7 months is just fantastic and quit the ciggies too!!! :goodjob:
Wow you must be feeling so proud of yourself.
Aunty Vic
Thanks so much for the warm welcome! :)
Yes, MOST of the time I'm feeling pretty good about what I've accomplished so far...it's those "what would it matter if I had just one" days that I have to watch out for. I lost a 2-3 year smoking quit because I didn't keep my guard up, I learned my lesson (the hard way) and I never want to go through that again. That's what is keeping me on track right now with my sobriety.... I've put in too much time & effort to let it be ruined by a one bad day or faulty thinking. I've found that talking about our quits & helping others can really make us stronger & more committed to staying strong in our resolve.
Nice to meet you!
K.

FallenAngel
March 7th, 2008, 09:40 PM
Thankful;286825 wrote: I was so happy because he has had a bad bout w/depression and low self-esteem for years. I think giving up the booze is just what he needs. All I can do is listen and encourage, but never preach. I wish more people had this experience with their friends instead of losing them all together.
l
Thank you so much for the warm welcome & kind words! :)
I recently came across this quote, and it seems so appropriate for what so many of us experience when we go through these personal changes in our lives... for me, it helps to put things into perspective & accept why people come & go in our lives:


There comes a point in your life when you realize who matters,
who never did, who won't anymore, and who always will.
So don't worry about people from your past,
there's a reason why they didn't make it to your future.
~Author Unknown

What I have come to see in myself over the past several months is that I am enjoying the everyday things more... I laugh more.... I enjoy people more.... I'm even starting to like ME more! lol What I am having problems with right now, is how to celebrate special occasions & have a good time... you see, we used to always use alcohol has the main source of our entertainment on these occasions, now we have to figure out different ways of making these times still feel special but without the alcohol.

july232007
March 7th, 2008, 10:36 PM
Fallen Angel,

Welcome aboard. I have been here and AF since last July. The sentiments you expressed are similar to many who have been AF here for many months. I know you will find welcoming friendship here. I have enjoyed reading your posts.

July

FallenAngel
March 7th, 2008, 10:47 PM
Thanks so much for the welcome!
Was your quit date July 23rd? Mine was the 24th of July, so I'm sure we have been going through a lot of the same transformations these past months. I don't know about you, but my 3rd month really sucked! lol All I wanted was to take a holiday from myself...but NOOO! lmao
I've been doing pretty good in general the past couple of months, but there are times when I romance the idea of a drink & have to quickly change my thought pattern before it gets a hold on me. That's where I have found talking with others is such good therapy.... it really does help when there are others that you can reach out to that know exactly what you're going through. This looks like a great place & I'm really looking forward to meeting & getting to know so many of you! :)

happydog
March 13th, 2008, 09:39 AM
Hi fallenAngel:welcome:

Wow...Just like to say congrat on 7months.
This is a great place with great people for support.
glad you found us, enjoy yourself.

Love

Teardrop.x

FallenAngel
March 13th, 2008, 11:33 AM
Thanks so much for the welcome Teardrop...
as I read through the threads, I can see this is a very special place with lots of wonderful people willing to give support! :)
I never thought I would be one that was able to get alcohol out of my life, but I guess my time came that I knew I needed to do it. So with every ounce of determination that I have been able to conjure up, I have managed to make it this far. Some days & weeks have been relatively easy, others have been the toughest I have ever known. But regardless of how it feels, I always keep one thing in mind: "I will NOT drink". I may WANT one...but that doesn't give me permission to HAVE one.... just gives me permission to whine, bitch & cry about it!! :H

xtexan
March 13th, 2008, 04:04 PM
FallenAngel:

Welcome to MWO.:welcome:

I've now AF sober for 2 years 3 months.

I also quit cigarettes when I quit drinking as the two were linked in my addict brain.

I also quit refined sugar and sweets last summer, and now totally off caffeine for 1 month now as well.

Here is the place for the long term abstainers to hang out, and I guess I'm a regular in this forum section.

If you have any questions or insights on the long term recovery process, I'll be here to share.

Neil

FallenAngel
March 13th, 2008, 09:14 PM
Dark chocolate is off your list too???


xtexan;290303 wrote:
I've now AF sober for 2 years 3 months.
I also quit cigarettes when I quit drinking as the two were linked in my addict brain.
I also quit refined sugar and sweets last summer, and now totally off caffeine for 1 month now as well.

Hi Neil...thanks so much for the welcome, you wouldn't believe how great it is to hear from another dual quitter! :goodjob:
Wow.... over 2 years for both of them....that is fantastic! You must feel like a totally new person... I know that after a year of being nicotine -free, I had changed tremendously. It wasn't until I educated myself on the effects that nicotine has on our brains, that I came to understand why it can have such a hold on us & how we can successfully quit & be content in the fact that we no longer smoke. I took a lot of what I learned from quitting smoking & used it to help me stay sober. In fact, it was the confidence & self-respect that I gained from my smoking quit that made me realize that I had to do something about my drinking. I've never "quit" drinking before, I have only stopped for a month or two in the past to try & moderate my drinking... so this is my first attempt.... and it is going to be the only one I need, because I am determined (no matter how hard it may get at times) to make this a life-long commitment.

Thanks for the offer of support... I may need it from time to time....
although I'm not a whiner, I do occasionally need a shoulder to lean on. (don't we all).

Nice to meet you!
K.

P.S.
No caffeine either?? Sheesh! lol

Guest
March 13th, 2008, 09:45 PM
Fallen Angel
Well done on your 7 months.. sounds like you have some good strategies working for you.

Neil is great advice on this board. Best of luck.
Brigid

FallenAngel
March 13th, 2008, 11:02 PM
about time too;290564 wrote:
Well done on your 7 months.. sounds like you have some good strategies working for you.

Hi Brigid, and thanks for the warm welcome!
So far my strategies have been working, but there is always so much more to learn...I think I will be a "work in progress" for the rest of my life! :H

K.