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    really struggling

    hi its been a while since ive been on here but im really struggling at present with bad withdrawals cant stop crying very nervous etc anyone chat with me please

    #2
    really struggling

    I logged on chat and you were gone, I had this yesteray...I'll chat if you want!
    "Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending"

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      #3
      really struggling

      theshark;788961 wrote: hi its been a while since ive been on here but im really struggling at present with bad withdrawals cant stop crying very nervous etc anyone chat with me please
      Hi Shark. How are you doing today?
      Stirly
      For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
      AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

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        #4
        really struggling

        theshark;788961 wrote: hi its been a while since ive been on here but im really struggling at present with bad withdrawals cant stop crying very nervous etc anyone chat with me please
        Hi to all. Just want to add something here. I am NOT judging anyone, but I noticed earlier today when I checked this thread out again that there were 79 viewings and only one reply. I didn't reply when I saw the thread, just went to chat where I found Shark and Tough. Again I am not criticizing anyone, nor am I patting myself on the back for responding. A lot of people check out MWO from work or are in another time zone.I'm just saying... All of us have bad days at one time or another...
        Stirly:flower:
        For every 60 seconds that you are angry, you lose a minute of happiness.
        AF since 10/10/2015:yay:

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          #5
          really struggling

          Hey shark and tough, hope things are better today. I am on the 1st day of cutting back (cutting in half)and am feeling headachy and tired. Hopefully tomorrow will be better for all of us!:h
          Life itself is the proper binge. Julia Child

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            #6
            really struggling

            I am new but old.

            Amethyst and Shark, and anyone else feeling the grip of the Evil Alcohol Fairy today,
            I am kinda new here but I have been at this for about 7 months now. I am familiar with what you are feeling. :l It is a hard road but much harder with the alcohol in the equation. I am sure we all know it, just accepting it all is hard. Fighting it. It does get easier as we walk this road though. I almost made it 3 months this last time. So much better than the drinking everyday and night my friends. So worth the fight. I am so sorry for your pain and the crying is part of it. Crying is a gift. It cleanses us and is a feeling. Feelings are what use to scare me. I would run to drink to hide from them, now I am learning to embrace them and know that it is much better to feel than not to. Easy to say but hard to learn. Alcohol lies to us in so many ways. It is a killer and a liar. In some I suppose it does not effect them? I still say it effects everyone, just some of us get the larger dose of the hell it can bring. I have found that if I can talk myself out of it by reason it works and also just putting it off as long as humanly possible and it is possible to do it I have seen people who have. Takes practice and commitment and inner strength that each time we beat it we get more and more of. Guilt associated with it causes more failure so try not to feel the guilt just count the good days and use the bad to learn. Each time you will get better and each little battle you win will give you more strength. It is really a kind of war I think? Things after the time I spend sober always seems to make me stronger and stronger. Of course the urges are set off by triggers and when we learn our triggers we can then eventually master them. It really is choice though. I chose to do it last time and gave into it. What a disappointment. Tricky bugger! It was like going on a special date with someone really good looking and thinking how good it would be, then getting them in bed and finding out they are shit there!:blush::wow: Sorry, best way to say that one mates. But it is like that really for me. I forget that it is not the same for me anymore, that I really do not get the same out of it anymore because I really do not want it. Just want relief and it is not gonna come from that anymore because I have changed from getting away from it a bit and learning so much. Does that make any sense? Anyway, it may look good and make you think that is what you want but as we have all seen or at least most of us if we are here anyway, it is not what it is cracked up to be and we all must find other ways of making ourselves feel good. Hot baths, walks, jokes or a good book, just what ever you feel like but not drinking. I know it sounds like I am simplifying it a bit but really I am not. It is very hard to teach ourselves that what we have been doing is not gonna work anymore and now it is time to find a new and healthier way to satisfy ourselves, comfort ourselves and love ourselves. Good luck and I hope this will help some of you. I am still looking for the answers myself but maybe some of what I have learned so far can help.

            Respectfully yours,
            T:l
            OK, I am starting all over. sigpic

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              #7
              really struggling

              Shark, I hope you are feeling beter now - been there myself. Walk, walk, walk, or if you snowed in tackle your home and start cleaning it. If you are like me and to jittery do a couple of tasks at the same time, moving from one to the other. Stirly, it's true, it's time zones, and in quite a couple of cases, myself included, I can't get into the chatroom. (Technologically challenged) Let's fight this fight hand in hand.
              make the least of the worst, and the most of the best - everyday.

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                #8
                really struggling

                jessie;789473 wrote: Shark, I hope you are feeling beter now - been there myself. Walk, walk, walk, or if you snowed in tackle your home and start cleaning it. If you are like me and to jittery do a couple of tasks at the same time, moving from one to the other. Stirly, it's true, it's time zones, and in quite a couple of cases, myself included, I can't get into the chatroom. (Technologically challenged) Let's fight this fight hand in hand.
                Hang in there Jessie,
                We are all fighting with you mate.
                Your new friend, T :l:l:l
                OK, I am starting all over. sigpic

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                  #9
                  really struggling

                  TsHope;789462 wrote: It was like going on a special date with someone really good looking and thinking how good it would be, then getting them in bed and finding out they are shit there!:blush::wow: Sorry, best way to say that one mates. But it is like that really for me.
                  Wow, what a good metaphor! I love it.

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                    #10
                    really struggling

                    TsHope,
                    Great post.
                    Thanks.

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                      #11
                      really struggling

                      I also got to say read this post earlier and like to also say what a great post TsHope! Thanks.x
                      Formerly known as Teardrop:l
                      sober dry since 11th Jan '2010' relapse/slip on 23/7/13 working in progress ! Sober date 25/7/13 ( True learning has often followed an eclipse, a time of darkness, but with each cycle of my recovery, the light grows stronger and my vision is clearer. (AA)
                      my desire to avoid hitting bottom again was more powerful then my desire to drink !

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                        #12
                        really struggling

                        Ts, that is a very good post especially about changing and really not wanting it anymore. We have just conditioned ourselves that alcohol is the answer. Thank you.

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                          #13
                          really struggling

                          Thanks

                          :thanks:Thank you my new friends,
                          I am still finding my way around here and am starting to figure it out (I think?). So many inspiring posts and so many wonderful threads! Possibilities are endless. Kinda like our new lives aye? Today I focused entirely on me!:blush: Felt a bit selfish but you see, I think sometimes we have to be. Up till now all I did was give myself away. That is still good but not all the time. Gotta make time for yourself and please yourself too and do it without the drink for an excuse. You know the drill... I did this and now I deserve a cold drink. No, it should be... I need a break and I need to take care of me. Then do something for just you. Good to do stuff for others but also do it for you and don't choose a drink because the drink is not something good or rewarding for you. For example... I was off today so I colored my hair, talked to my pals and played with my dog, Then, took a hot bath, candles,tea, music and all! Then I got on here and am talking to you all. Heading now into week 4 again for the fourth time in 7 months but hey, I count my sober days and as for the slips, well , I am not happy about it but I am not gonna carry it with me. Learn and let it go. I get longer and better each time and I am shooting for forever here (Abstinence) so how do you count that? I know we all have different goals but that one is my own personal war. Not a good drinker and never was. Drank allot but not good at it. Always ends in crap so no more.
                          Well, just wanted to thank you all for the kind and inspiring words. Wishing you all well and see ya soon.
                          Your new friend,
                          T:l
                          OK, I am starting all over. sigpic

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