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This could so be me

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    This could so be me

    A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital,
    wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and
    nose.

    A young student nurse appears to give
    him a partial sponge bath.

    "Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

    Embarrassed, the young nurse replies,
    "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."

    He struggles to ask again,
    "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"

    Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure
    and heart rate from worrying about his testicles,
    she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.

    She raises his gown, holds his manhood
    in one hand and his testicles in the other.

    She looks very closely and says,
    "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."

    The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask,
    smiles at her, and says very slowly,
    "Thank you very much. That was wonderful.
    Now listen very, very closely: Are - my - test - results - back?"
    Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




    DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

    #2
    This could so be me

    PMSL!!!!!!!!!
    "It's not your job to like me, it's mine!"

    AF 10th May 2010
    NF 12th May 2010

    Comment


      #3
      This could so be me

      Nelz...That was great! Got anymore?? SS

      Comment


        #4
        This could so be me

        slowly sinking;1213981 wrote: Nelz...That was great! Got anymore?? SS
        Ohhhh, I gotta million of em.....(said in best Ralph Mouth voice)

        HOW TO WASH A CAT:
        1. Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup of pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
        2. Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him towards the bathroom.
        3. In one smooth movement put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need to stand on the lid.
        4. At this point the cat will self agitate and make ample suds. Never mind the noises that come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this!
        5. Flush the toilet three or four times. This provides a 'Power-Wash' and 'Rinse'.
        6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Be sure that there are no people between the bathroom and the front door.
        7. Stand well back, behind the toilet as far as you can, and quickly lift the lid.
        8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom, and run outside where he will dry himself off.
        9. Both the toilet and the cat will be sparkling clean.

        Yours Sincerely, The Dog
        Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




        DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

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          #5
          This could so be me

          I see you're a cat lover too!!!

          Comment


            #6
            This could so be me

            A woman goes to her doctor and says "doctor, something strange is happening..I've got quarters coming out of me"! He says "That's odd, go home, take this medication and you should be fine".
            She comes back in a week and says, "Now, I've got dimes, nickles, AND pennies coming out of me"!!
            He thinks a minute and says,
            "I know what it is, You're going through the change"!!!!!

            Comment

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