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    #1

    Your triggers

    Hey gang,
    As an oldie who has been hanging here for 5 years I know that we have to shake up the board a bit to keep things rolling. As nice as it is for members to get to know each other more personally, sometimes the banter back and forth becomes so comfortable that it doesn't seem that folks are really working on their issues and lurkers are thinking, "man, I came here for support and all they talk about is how their tomatoes are growing!" Funny, but kind of true. So...

    Let's talk about what our personal issues are with our problems with AL and what triggers us.

    For me, I don't always like to stop at two drinks once I start. I have been known to open a bottle of wine in my home to only have one and the bottle is empty by the end of the night. Then I find myself depressed, slightly anxious the next day and beating myself up because I can't believe I did that to myself again. So...my solution is to not keep wine in the house but purchase as needed. Example: dinner party Friday so will purchase wine for the party but wine doesn't sit around on display like in some homes.

    I have the same problem at big events, weddings, etc. I have embarrassed myself more than once by getting too "mushy" or "lushy" when I go over 3 drinks. I don't fall into the cake so to speak but even to slur a little and someone else hears it...not good. I don't want to be that person anymore so I come here to get the support to drink responsibly.

    How about you?
    :l
    Eve11
    "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

    ~Jack Welsh~:h

    God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:
    Tags: None
    #2
    Your triggers

    Thanks Evie. Wonderful Thread !

    For me it's the Witching hour as its called which kept getting earlier and earlier until 3pm looked pretty acceptable. It was uncanny how a clock could set my thoughts (or lack of thoughts! ) off so regularly.

    Another biggie for me is TALKING ON THE PHONE!! RED ALERT! DANGER WILL ROBINSON! I don't talk much at night anymore. Just read here and stay with the kids.

    Certain people can trigger me. In fact I am camping Thursday with my 2 biggest triggers whom I love dearly.... I think I will be okay as there will be lots of activety and everyone there knows I am trying to stay AF.

    Certain there's more so will think of them and post!
    :l
    On My Own Way Out Since May 20, 2012
    *If you think poorly of yourself, you can fail with a clear conscience.
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/f11/tool-box-27556.html tool box
    https://www.mywayout.org/community/f19/newbies-nest-30074.html newbie nest

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      #3
      Your triggers

      Eve, I find it hard to pin point my triggers because I have found my self wanting liquor both when I am really upset and even more when I am in a great mood. I have pretty much just decided to try and cut liquor out of my life and stick to a few beers whenever. I really have no problem stopping when I need to with beer like I did with liquor, last night I had 3 cold ones in the fridge and just decided to leave them there and just had a ton of ice water. Had the entire house to myself for 5 hours last night and still was fine.

      I do feel this site is very helpful because it keeps me accountable, I know I am honest with everyone here....................
      And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off ~ Florence and the Machine

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        #4
        Your triggers

        what a great topic! but gosh eve, where do I begin? :H

        The witching hour used to be a big one, but I seem to have shaken that one off. Stress is a big one but I don't automatically go "I'm stressed, I need a drink now!" like I used to, it's more like, today was crap so I think I'll drink tonight and that might be an hour to a few hours later so it's more of a choice I make than a knee jerk reaction. Also when I work on the house is still a huge one for me, it's the reward at the end of a hard and tiring days work. And one I've pinpointed lately, is like hyperactivity. when I don't drink I feel like I have this nervous energy and especially after a few days af, I just can't handle it and I just want to drink so I can feel still again, not constantly thinking and not feeling restless anymore.

        I also don't keep al in sight around the house because just seeing it would be a trigger, I have a cupboard where I store it so I'm not looking at it constantly. I used to be a burbon drinker, and DH usually keeps a bottle in the kitchen but I really don't get tempted by it anymore because I rarely drink it now by choice, in the past it was like a beacon calling to me.

        Comment

          #5
          Your triggers

          Danger Will Robinson........LMAO you are "dating" us right there.

          Cooking out on the grill was my BIGGEST trigger ever. I couldnt even prepare the meat without an adult beverage in my hands. But, now, its some flavored seltzer water, and TBO, I didnt even think about a beer........yay!
          Living on Planet Sober since 05/02/11




          DAREDEVIL COOKIE MONSTER

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            #6
            Your triggers

            Great topic, Eve! I find that my cravings are coming when I'm arguing with my wife, or something upsets me or makes me mad. A bad day at work, or even being around certain people (especially my mother, how sad is that!) can set me craving a few drinks. Today is day 24, and I wonder how good I'll be after reaching my initial 30 day AF goals.

            I know I don't want to return to my over-indulgent ways, and probably need more than 30 days to be "ready" to try moderation. I definitely am not there yet, as I still think that one nice cold Heineken would lead to about 10 more the same night!
            Well the 1st are the hardest days don't you worry anymore.
            When life looks like easy street there is danger at your door.

            Comment

              #7
              Your triggers

              I completely blanked on my biggest trigger - Dieting - I truly believe I have no problem with beer I can have 1 or none or 4 and no issues but for some reason when I diet I feel deprived or something in the evening and really want those few beers but do not want the calories so I resort to one or two shots which NEVER stopped at one or two shots!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
              And it's hard to dance with a devil on your back so shake him off ~ Florence and the Machine

              Comment

                #8
                Your triggers

                Thanks for a great thread, Eve11!

                My "arguments" with myself and AL are 1) lunch on the weekends, and 2) late afternoon either when I've just come home from work, or when I've finished writing or whatever I'm doing at home.

                I've pretty much conquered the lunch thing, except when I'm away on a holiday or out with a certain friend. My BIG problem is that "a" drink with lunch pretty much invariably turns into sipping through the rest of the afternoon, having two more with dinner, and well, we all know the story.

                Number 2 is my moderation struggle. If I'm not drinking that day, no problem. If I am, then it is very VERY difficult to have only 2 or 3 if I start at 4 or 5pm.

                sigh.......

                Comment

                  #9
                  Your triggers

                  My triggers , bipolar aside (haha no such thing!), are things I can't control, like my parents health. Bit of a control freak I guess. Earlier this year we sold our home of 15 years and moved and I didn't want to but the place was just too small - out of my control and a big trigger. As long as its something I can do something about I am ok - control freak perhaps??
                  "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans" - John Lennon

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                    #10
                    Your triggers

                    My post just reminded me of that AA poem - my mum used to say it a lot - mmmm wisdom to know the difference - yep that's a good one I can mostly control my bipolar, I can control my choices, but I can't control the fact that my parents are going to die one day....
                    "Life is what happens to you when you're busy making other plans" - John Lennon

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                      #11
                      Your triggers

                      My triggers are not the same, or as bad as they used to be. Before I came here, my trigger was simply coming home from work. I have gotten to the place now, thankfully, that AL is not the first thing I think about when I leave work. Now I think it is just wanting to have one (or two) moderate AL nights a week. I need to learn that I don't have to drink just because it is the weekend.


                      "I like people too much or not at all."                       Sylvia Plath

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                        #12
                        Your triggers

                        LibraryGirl;1359679 wrote: I need to learn that I don't have to drink just because it is the weekend.
                        Yeah LG, I need to learn that one too. Also, I need to learn that I don't have to consume the whole bottle of wine just because it is open. I can cork it and save it.
                        :l
                        Eve11
                        "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

                        ~Jack Welsh~:h

                        God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

                        Comment

                          #13
                          Your triggers

                          Yes, that is something I struggle with too, Eve. Hard to let a good bottle of wine go unfinished, lol. I know when I buy one, I probably will finish it. Might be best for me to stick to 12 oz bottles of beer, for the most part.


                          "I like people too much or not at all."                           Sylvia Plath

                          Comment

                            #14
                            Your triggers

                            little bottles

                            My husband has begun buying little bottles of wine...one for each of us, for a special occasion, now seems like a real treat! Other than those times, and actual dinner parties, I am still sticking with my "no drinking at home" plan...plus it helps me to keep the booze out of sight. I am still a work in progress when it comes to social drinking...oh well! FF
                            . "It is only with the heart that one can see clearly; that which is essential, is invisible to the eye.". Antoine de Saint-Exupery

                            Comment

                              #15
                              Your triggers

                              Yeah, I wish they sold 1/2 bottles of quality wine. Enough for 2 or 2 1/2 glasses like a 1/2 bottle of wine. That would be perfect for me. I can't figure it...kind of a weird psychological thing but I want to keep going back to the bottle to have just a little bit more and it is my downfall. Have had success where I can cork it and think of everyone here cheering me on to do so but not successul all of the time so I am like you both LG, and FF, better to not have a bottle at home other than if hubby is sharing it with me.
                              :l
                              Eve11
                              "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

                              ~Jack Welsh~:h

                              God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

                              Comment

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