Sarge is baaack!!!

[techie]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Alright you miserable vermin. I need your help. That cotton pickin' Nurse Jones has NOT reported in. I know she was active in delousing the heads of Mr G's groupies, but hell that was last month. Cookie told me he saw her in cellophane flowers of yellow and green. I just visited Cookie. Doc says about another week or so he'll be back in the mess! We're pulling for you Cookie. ANYONE with info on Jones call 1 800 NEE DHER!!!

GET READY FOR TOMORROW YOU SWAMP RATS WE ARE GOING TO KICK IT INTO HIGH GEAR!!! Attached files [img]/converted_files/1541910=5823-attachment.jpg[/img]

[Charlotte's Web]

Sarge is baaack!!!

I'm here, Sarge! Just getting ready to go to the gym.

The problem I have this morning is ... erm ... well... excessive gas. I have a CPAP machine at night and I think I swallowed air last night instead of breathing it. I am 14 kgs heavier than I was yesterday morning and it's all air. Any suggestions?

[techie]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Charlotte's Web;1086910 wrote: I'm here, Sarge! Just getting ready to go to the gym.

The problem I have this morning is ... erm ... well... excessive gas. I have a CPAP machine at night and I think I swallowed air last night instead of breathing it. I am 14 kgs heavier than I was yesterday morning and it's all air. Any suggestions?

CW,

I know there is a better way than the CRAP gear. I need to find it and will send! GOT IT!!!

NoMask.com Official Site | CPAP PRO | No Masks, No Straps, No Headgear - CPAP PRO is a Comfortable CPAP Mask for Sleep Apnea Patients and CPAP Machine users. We Ship Worldwide.

[Mish]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Private Mish reportage, Sarge. Sitting here with foot up on cushion as I caught my little toe on the door frame on Monday and heard it snap like a dry twig. Xrays confirm a break. I won't be running any marathons but upper body and core exercises would be appreciated.
The back garden is finished, Sir. Vegies for the troops are abundant and I'll be crating them up and shipping them off to Cookie directly. Still have some seiving to do out the front, but taking it easy until I can realign my toe with the rest of the foot. It stuck out at a 45 degree angle...interesting, really.
Good to have you back, Sir.

[byebyebridgetjones]

Sarge is baaack!!!

techie;1086094 wrote: Because of severe budget cuts Old Sarge was forced out on an unexpected leave.

Really ?

I heard you were being treated for erectile dysfunction.

I'm in.

[Miss Behaving]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Mish;1086934 wrote:
The back garden is finished, Sir. Vegies for the troops are abundant and I'll be crating them up and shipping them off to Cookie directly. Still have some seiving to do out the front, but taking it easy until I can realign my toe with the rest of the foot. It stuck out at a 45 degree angle...interesting, really.
Good to have you back, Sir.

Ouch!!!!! Hope your toe recovers its parallel positioning as soon as, Mish!!!

I did something to the back of my calf out running on Monday, but I iced it as soon as I was back and it is getting better as the week goes on. Learned a lesson about how necessary warming up is as you get older :H Had a quiet day doing stretching/core/balance stuff today. Right by the beach and we have had a return of the summer weather so it had a holiday feel to it.

Like Mish, we have an adundance of vegies, but the weather isn't quite warm enough, so I ripped out most a couple of weekends ago and planted flowers for winter. We have a courgette plant left with a couple of courgettes and about 30 green tomatoes which I'll probably turn into relish. Supermarket prices on vegies are crazy at the moment as everyone gets rid of their "last of the season" crops, so there is no excuse for not eating healthily apart from my annual obsession with creating the perfect hot non - cross bun!

[techie]

Sarge is baaack!!!

byebyebridgetjones;1086938 wrote: Really ?

I heard you were being treated for erectile dysfunction.

I'm in.

I think the Frog may dispute your claim!

[tawnyfrog]

Sarge is baaack!!!

byebyebridgetjones;1086938 wrote:

I heard you were being treated for erectile dysfunction.

Nah. He's being treated for Psychotic Delusion.

[techie]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Alright you biologically challenged primordial jejune waste products. ARE YOU READY TO ROCK??? I AM READY TO CHANGE YOUR LIVES. OK, I do sometimes succumb to the amphibian's, aka TF's mawkish remarks but hey, I'm the dag blammed leader here. We can always do wtihout enemy propaganda. So tuck in that tummy, focus on the positive and let's have some fun. i'll admit we have a lot of female participnts here in this platoon. I think its GREAT and it gives Sarge a lump in his otherwise lumpless life....so BIG FINISH GIRLS...

Food for thought:

You don't have to wish or hope for things to happen. Because you can make things happen.

You don't have to wonder whether something will work or not. Because you can gather the resources, make the effort and find out for yourself.

There's no need to live in fear of what life might bring. You can make your life unfold in the way you'd like to see it unfold.

There's no reason to worry about lack or limitation. You can act to work your way through whatever obstacles and challenges are present.

Of all the abilities you have, the most powerful ability is the ability to utilize your abilities in a meaningful way. Not only can you make things happen, you can make things happen with purpose and intention and in the service of your highest values.

Don't worry or wonder or beg or steal or wish or regret or envy or wait. Use all that energy to make life happen, in the way you know is best, right now.


Kicking Rear End:

There are 2 areas of my body where as a woman, I love feeling absolute soreness from the next day: my abs and my butt! I love it when I can?t fidget in my chair, walk up stairs or bend down to tie my shoes. The pain of a brutal butt workout is one all girls need to endure if not experience once in their life.
The pain of a great butt workout supersedes the pleasure of being admired for having a bountiful behind. Beautiful Butts are adored everywhere. Jennifer Lopez, Jessica Beal, Halle Berry and Britney Spears are some of the celebrity bottom figures onlookers have grown to admire. Fitness Competitors like Jamie Eason, Tina Rigdon, Amy Fadhli and Annette Milbers also share the same girly gifts of a great butt. If you don?t have a totally flat stomach or chiseled arms, you can still pull off a HOT outfit if your behind is tight, toned and totally in shape.

In order to get in tip top form you must perform the following:[list type=decimal][*]Incorporate a Butt Friendly Diet.[/list type=decimal]This simply means to eat a balanced, whole foods diet and stack up on your HIGH 5 protein shakes. (Personally, I make it a goal to have 1-2 per day) I also ensure I eat 5 small meals a day and minimize my sugar intake.

• Additional Tips for muscle building and fat burning foods:
  
  • Eat a diet high in fiber
    
  • Drink a gallon of water
    
  • Take your vitamins (I like the liquid form: Max Vit-Acell)
    
  • Eat whole and organic foods as much as possible (like nuts, salads, fruits, vegetables and supplement with Max Green Synergy).
    [list type=decimal]
    
  • Engage in Cardio sessions like you?re married to it.
    
    The BEST exercise to build your glute area in the cardio room is all of them! Some people are bias to certain cardio exercises, but I firmly believe that every machine targets your butt; it just depends on how you station your weight and machine height level.
    
  
  Examples of Cardio Butt Training:
  

[list type=decimal]
The Stairmaster. (If you have the stair climber it is EVEN BETTER!) Make sure the weight of your body is pushing through your heel and you?re upper body is neutral and naturally aligned. Focus on driving your heel down and raising your opposing knee up for full stretch and glute muscle strength.
The Bike. (If you have an upright or spinning bike it is EVEN BETTER!) Make sure the seat is leveled correctly and your knees have full extension. For intensity, raise the level up to a level 8 (from a scale of 1-10) and drive each push with your butt and hamstrings.
The Treadmill. (If you have a heavy duty, commercial machine it is EVEN BETTER!) Make sure you?re fastened to the emergency belt and jogging at a good pace before raising the incline level. Slowly raise the incline a level every minute and focus on maintaining a consistent jog/walk for at least 5 minutes. Perform intervals of 5 minutes at a zero incline jogging, with 5 minutes at a challenging incline jog/walk. That will kick your but for sure!
[/list type=decimal]Depending on your endurance levels, I would suggest you perform cardio 4-5 times per week at a 30-60 minute range.
Memorize these 4 Butt Blasting Articles as if you?ll be tested this summer when you reveal your bottom in a ?barely there? bikini!
[/list type=decimal]
When performing butt exercises I like to focus on ?one cheek at a time?. Not only does this allow me to focus almost entirely on the squeeze, tightening and contraction of the movement, but it also forces me to perform higher repetitions using different angles as the other side fatigues. As you perform these exercises, make sure you ALWAYS have neutral alignment in your back, neck shoulders, feet and head. Also, don?t forget these 3 big Advices: THINK about the muscle you are trying to engage, FOCUS on the movement and PERFORM with full intensity.
Think, Focus and Perform. Simple!

• One legged Lunges
  Lunges are my favorite and most effective lower-body exercise. In order to properly execute, I tell my clients to imagine being on a carousel in which you are the horse and your movement is basically up and down. (Not forward and back) As you lower yourself into a lunge position, make sure your knee never passes your toes and your weight should be centered pushing through your heel.[list type=decimal]
  
• Place the bottom of your foot onto a chair/bench/ball and place the other foot firmly on the floor.
  
• Square your hips, shoulders and legs forward and prepare to begin a lunge movement starting in neutral alignment.
  
• Lunge down for two counts and push upward for one. Perform for 10-20 reps. Switch and repeat for 3-4 sets.
  
  • Doggie Kicks
    
  This exercise is a major butt burner if performed with full focus and follow through. (Because believe me, you will want to stop mid-set)
  Place your body in an ?all four position? facing the floor. (Make sure your lower back is not hunched or swayed.)
  Lift one leg up resembling an ?L? shape to the side of your body.
  Without losing height, sway your leg back towards your other foot.
  Perform 15-25 reps. Switch and repeat for 3-4 sets.
  [/list type=decimal]
  Suitcase Dead Lifts
  

Similar to a regular dead lift, a suitcase dead lift is when you apply the dumb bell weight to the side of the body (like a suitcase) versus the front of the body. As you stretch your hamstrings and glutes downward you will feel an extra stretch challenged on the outer part of your hips and glutes.
Standing straight forward, place the dumb bell to the side of your body (creating an imbalance)
[*]Like a dead lift, bend your body forward and down while feeling an extra challenge on the side of the weighted dumb bell.
[*]Perform 15-20 reps. Switch and Repeat for 3-4 sets.

• Plyometric Frog Jumps
  The last killer butt exercise needed to end with a BANG! In my exercise terminology, a ?Bang Exercise? is one that leaves your heart and muscles exhausted to the point where moving 2 inches of weight leave you in excruciating pain.[list type=decimal]
  
• Sitting in a squatted position, turn your knees outward and place your arms in front of your body.
  Jump explosively high while kicking your legs out and landing again in a squatted position.
  Perform 10-15 reps for 3-4 sets.
  [/list type=decimal]
  • One of the most animalistic, physical attractions of the human species is the appearance of a firm, round and shapely butt. If you give special care and attention to a healthy diet, cardio sessions and strength workouts, you will experience the brutal pain but otherwise beauty of a sore butt ? In the end, at least you will look great in your favorite pair of jeans! Happy Training!
    
  
  Sarge :h
  

Attached files [img]/converted_files/1542432=5823-attachment.jpg[/img]

[one2many]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Deadly Sarge. Thank you x

[red67]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Checking in.....lost 8lbs so far. This is day 14 al free for me and feeling great! Eating better, drinking lots of water, taking my supplements and excercising almost daily. I have a long way to go yet but so far so good

[Charlotte's Web]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Good morning at the gym. A mini triathlon - 500 m row, 2 km ride and 1 km run!

[techie]

Sarge is baaack!!!

Listen people I need you all to keep focused this weekend. Cookie has promised to make a vegetable soup instead of possum chowder. Keep your eyes on that goal and you will get there. I think that if Mish can do 50 squat thrusts with a badly mangled toe we all can exert some extra effort. NOW MOVE OUT YOU MAGGOTS!!!

Motivation:

With all its imperfections and challenges, today is still the best day yet. Though you may have known much love and joy and fulfillment in the past, you can experience even more today.

For you can bring with you to this day the best of all you've ever known, and then you can add to its beauty. On top of that, you can leave behind the disappointments and limiting assumptions that have held you back, and free yourself to truly soar.

Sure, there are problems that you will face. Yet you can face them with a lifetime of wisdom and experience, more today than you've ever had before.

You're better prepared than ever to transform those problems into opportunities. And you're more determined than ever to transform the best of those opportunities into real, meaningful value.

All of what you've been through has made you stronger and more capable, in ways that you're not even fully aware of yet. Today you can choose to use that ever-growing strength and ability in the service of your most treasured visions.

Whatever else may be going on, in many important and powerful ways you're the best you've ever been. Grab the opportunity that is today, and make it into something great.

Lifestyle:

Paleo Style Diet


I haven't updated this page for a long time, but this time I have to. Gary Taubes have written a new book, "The Diet Delusion", that provides the last piece of the puzzle of obesity that Atkins and others have needed to construct a complete and cohesive theory. Taubes' book signals a shift i paradigm. Please watch this video: Big Fat Lies speech at Stevens Institute of Technology, 2008 as it supplements the stuff here. Make no mistake, people like Audette, Atkins and the Eades' have been so friggin close. Taubes just provides the last piece of the puzzle and in doing so completely flips over the paradigm.
The Paleolithic Diet a.k.a. Neanderthin is the diet that we humans are genetically adapted to eat. The paleolithic age is the same as the Stone Age - so this is a stone age diet or life style. This has been humanity's preferred diet for something like 2.5 million years, and humans have only genetically changed 0.005% since the introduction of agriculture (the Neolithic). As a rule, agricultural (and technological) products are not healthy to eat, and we should predominantly try to eat only those whole foods that are healthy in their raw state (though almost all humans, including hunter-gatherers cook their food). (Check out the Paleolithic links)
This is not a quick-fix diet but a way of life. You're not supposed to starve when you eat only paleo foods. Eat when you're hungry!

Exercise:

GREAT Exercises for the butt and abs...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=76iV0F9Vnfs[/video]]

Attached files [img]/converted_files/1543499=5823-attachment.jpg[/img]

[techie]

Sarge is baaack!!!

That dang Private Miss Behavin' has some good stuff to say in the undies thread. Cookie is checking out a gluten free hot cross bun recipe for her to try. More to follow. "Hey Cookie what the hell is that smell?"

[Miss Behaving]

Sarge is baaack!!!

I would be very interested in Cookie's gluten free hot cross bun recipe Sarge!! I tried one (from Epicurious) but they were awful!! So for the moment I'm using wheat flour.

But this mornings batch was a "ginger" version just because it was just for us and my mum - ie; ginger added to spices and crystallized ginger added as part of the dried fruit quota.

They are still rising, so I cant tell you yet how they have turned out!