Three months

[RedJib]

I can hardly believe it, three months (90 days) have passed since I last had AL! That's the longest in my entire adult life. All the other people on these boards who tell us to hang in there because life will look and feel very different after an extended period of sobriety, well, they're absolutely right. The world does look different, and I feel so much better than I have for any significant period of time in past two decades.

Many of you emphasize that we need to make a plan for quitting and define a goal. I don't think I really did that, except to say to myself, "I'm not going to drink today, and I hope--I'm fairly sure--I won't drink tomorrow." I believe there might be a time in the future when I could moderate and manage it properly, but I know it's not now, and it's probably not for a long time yet. So I'm okay with being a bit vague about my plan and a goal; this day-at-a-time approach seems to be working, and I don't feel resentful of others who can drink, I don't often have a craving (very few, in fact), and I enjoy my slightly-dull AF days.

I still don't sleep very well for maybe two out of every three nights, but maybe that will change with long term sobriety. I sure hope so; it's my only real disappointment about this AF life. (yes, I've tried hypnotherapy, GABA, melatonin, 5hp, magnesium, valerian, and even a prescribed hypnotic. None have been really effective.) Running and eating well have made a huge difference in my energy overall, but as fellow-insomniacs know, if you don't get sleep for one or more nights, you do end up dragging your butt around all day.

Thanks for your support (reading these threads has made a huge difference in my outlook and my progress). Cheers,
Jib

[Lavande]

Three months

Congrats on your 90 AF days RedJib!
It's an amazing feeling, isn't it?

I personally gave up the hope of moderating after my first 30 days. Some small voice just told me that it wouldn't work, why would it? So I made up my mind then that AF was right for me.

I actually developed my sleep problems at age 42, hormonal stuff, wasn't really doing any drinking then. I actually thought slugging a couple of glasses of wine before bed would help & maybe it did for a while. But after a while, as the drinking progressed my sleep problems became much worse. Here I am now at 2 years AF & I'm still not sleeping the way I would really like but I'm 15 years older - I guess it's age related at this point - not really sure.

i think if we live well, eat healthy & exercise then we're doing the best we can do

Congrats again!

Lav

[Bean]

Three months

Congrats Jib. 3 months is awesome. I reached that milestone only a few weeks ago myself. I feel the same way about wanting to encourage new people to hang in there because life really does get so much better. As I posted earlier in my own thread, I'm the happiest and healthiest I've been in years and it's all down to being AF and the ripple effect that has on everything else.

Keep going!
Bean

[Chillgirl]

Three months

:goodjob: Jib - 3 months is an awesome milestone! Yes life really does get better and better so keep doing what your doing. I'm lucky as my sleep improved significantly when I quit but what I have noticed that on the nights when I don't get a good sleep and have only say 4 hours, I'm still able to function really well the next day because I haven't been drinking.

[hillsidetime]

Three months

Redjib, great work on your 90 days, you should really be proud of yourself. I do hope that your sleeping improves, that must really be frustrating and exhausting. Keep adding those sober days together, and like you say, you can think about the future in good time.
Take care,
Hill

[greeneyes]

Three months

90 days is tremendous!! Congratulations!

[Kimberley]

Three months

Congratulations RedJib, that's awesome!! I will just give you one piece of advice that I give everyone who does a notable AF stint for the first time. If you truly want to be AF, do NOT let this go. Don't let one bad day or one temptation ruin your AF time. It is so much harder to get back on the horse the 2nd, 3rd, 4th time etc. I know - unfortunately I've been there. So hold onto your sobriety no matter what comes your way. Good luck, you have a great attitude and are doing a great job.

K x

[RedJib]

Three months

Thanks for the encouragement, everybody. It's much appreciated.

There is one other thing about the people on this site which has been a huge eye-opener for me. It's not just that I discovered a bunch of others who are struggling with the same issues, but something about what happens to us before we make the decision to quit.

I'd had this ongoing 'voice' (not like a mental illness voice), maybe it was self-talk, but it nattered away at me daily. Anyways, the voice was always telling me that I was bullshitting myself about the AL not being as serious a problem as I knew it was. It would remind me of the physical symptoms that I suspected were caused solely by drinking, it would remind me about how poorly motivated I'd become to do some of the activities I used to enjoy. And it would remind me, right up until I took the first sip, that I was going to feel great for about fifteen minutes, and then I was going to feel like crap for another day. It was like a whole crazy conversation going on with myself about drinking, every day--even the days when I didn't drink. I never knew until I read the threads on mwo that SO MANY others experienced this same thing. Now, after three months of not drinking, that voice is a whole lot quieter! Yea!

[madmans]

Three months

good job on your 3 months Redjib :goodjob: :goodjob:

[damo180]

Three months

RedJib;1098923 wrote: Thanks for the encouragement, everybody. It's much appreciated.

There is one other thing about the people on this site which has been a huge eye-opener for me. It's not just that I discovered a bunch of others who are struggling with the same issues, but something about what happens to us before we make the decision to quit.

I'd had this ongoing 'voice' (not like a mental illness voice), maybe it was self-talk, but it nattered away at me daily. Anyways, the voice was always telling me that I was bullshitting myself about the AL not being as serious a problem as I knew it was. It would remind me of the physical symptoms that I suspected were caused solely by drinking, it would remind me about how poorly motivated I'd become to do some of the activities I used to enjoy. And it would remind me, right up until I took the first sip, that I was going to feel great for about fifteen minutes, and then I was going to feel like crap for another day. It was like a whole crazy conversation going on with myself about drinking, every day--even the days when I didn't drink. I never knew until I read the threads on mwo that SO MANY others experienced this same thing. Now, after three months of not drinking, that voice is a whole lot quieter! Yea!

Love this post Red, its like you were writing what was in my mind, I relate so much to what you say.

Congratulations on your 90 days, its an amazing achievement.
Lets hope we all keep going.

All the Best.
Damo