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    #1

    My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

    Good evening all..

    I've had a long term drinking problem, which I am still trying to solve.

    I'm drinking a lot less than I was..

    5 years ago I was drinking 3 bottles of red wine EVERY night. (horrible time it was!)

    Now I'm hovering at a bottle of red or less, with a once (sometimes twice) a week 2 bottles of wine blow out.

    I've also been reasonably hooked on Diazepam (Valium) which I used for AL detox at first but just ended up taking 3 of with my bottle and a half of wine.

    Now almost finished tapering off the pills and trying to stick to a bottle of wine or less a night.

    Starting Tomorrow night I'm going to attempt a slow taper (fraught with danger, I know)

    8 standard drinks for 2 nights, 6 standard drinks for 2 nights, 4 standard drinks for 2 nights until I get to zero.

    I've ordered some Kudzu (can't hurt, so will see if that helps)

    I, like so many of us suffer from Depression and Anxiety.

    Yep, tried all the drugs, none of them good and some habit forming or at least hard to get off due to withdrawal syndromes..

    Have just completed a 12 week Group Social anxiety course, which was very helpful, am working on my depression (I know what to do about it, just really hard when all you want to do is lie in bed all day!)

    Have enrolled in a Meditation Course, am slowly getting back to the Gym and am planning to get some Classical Guitar lessons (Used to be not bad)

    So, all in all...I wan't my fucking life back!

    I'm sick of feeling sorry for myself and getting drunk alone (Dating is on the list, once I accomplish some of my goals and am feeling more confident again..)

    One thing I've come to realise, is that I have created ALL of my situation myself, so therefore am responsible for fixing it.

    I used to think I was a victim and that it wasn't my fault..

    I was a victim...but I was also the punisher... That finishes as of NOW.

    Thanks to all for listening to my rant

    David :-)
    Tags: None
    #2
    My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

    Wavey;1176613 wrote:




    One thing I've come to realise, is that I have created ALL of my situation myself, so therefore am responsible for fixing it.

    I used to think I was a victim and that it wasn't my fault..
    Great to see you Waves, and great post. I agree with the above excerpt from your post. We all have our external environments and situations to deal with that will affect us, BUT, we decide what we let in, and what goes on between our ear's. Therefore, i know with a plan, and a bit of effort and ball's, we can be where we want to be.

    You mentioned the tapering off as dangerous? I know you do your research, but i've gotta say i hope you are doing this with medical supervision/support.

    I'm off to bed now (alone :upset, but i'm sure we'll catch up later.

    Best wishes friend, and good to see you, AND with a plan. :goodjob:

    'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

    Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

    Comment

      #3
      My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

      Hey, Wavey

      Good to see you back. If you're looking for a place to vent, you've found it :H You can do whatever you like on your own thread. Well, until you get banned and it gets deleted, that is

      All I can recommend is that you plan each day in as much detail as possible, especially when it gets closer to home time. When I was doing my own taper, I had a list of activities before I even went home. That way, I minimised the risk of not being busy enough and not being able to focus on things other than drinking. That, and lots of time on MWO.

      :goodjob: on having a plan. I really hope it works for you.
      I'll do whatever it takes
      AF 21/08/2009

      Comment

        #4
        My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

        Hi David. Sounds like you have a good plan of action. Do you have someone to keep an eye on you during detox in case you need medical attention? Please don't be afraid to go to the hospital if you need it.

        I never had any luck with tapering just because once I start I can't stop. But I know some people ARE able to do it. I hope you are one of those but if for some reason you are NOT able to taper, don't give up!!!! You can always get help with a medical detox.

        Good for you finding more productive ways to cope with depression and anxiety than booze. I dont' know if you've run across Lavande here on the forum, but she has some great suggestions for some natural product alternatives that have helped her with both of those conditions. Just something to look into.

        I will be rooting for you.

        DG
        Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
        Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

        One day at a time.

        Comment

          #5
          My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

          G, I'm no stranger to this, as you know..

          If I suffer any serious withdrawals. I will have a few more drinks per night, my plan is flexible...

          One thing I WILL NOT do is increase my Valium intake to counter the withdrawal symptoms, I'ts less fun coming off Valium than AL..

          Cheers for your reply mate...

          Comment

            #6
            My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

            Wavey,:l

            Good advice you've already been given. Just wanted to say glad to see you back and giving it another go.
            It could be worse, I could be filing.
            AF since 7/7/2009

            Comment

              #7
              My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

              Cheers Guys,

              It actually helps reading your replies and having your support :-)

              It never used to, when I was on here posting dunk all the time...

              I'm not getting drunk anymore.. I have vastly more important things to do!

              God, I hope I can back up these words..

              Comment

                #8
                My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

                All the Best Wavey,

                Withdrawals are painful but the rewards are greater. Try sticking to the plan and the way I foresee it, the real spoiler comes in when you are on the 2 a day routine...thats when you need to be very strong. Good you have ordered Kudzu, If i were you I would also keep L-glut handy for the "2 a day" days. L-glut is healthy as it helps reducing ammonia in the brain, recovers your body faster and zeroes out the cravings. Give it a thought...

                Vynan

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                  #9
                  My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

                  all the best.....be strong
                  I love my family more than alcohol.:h
                  Live in the Solution....not the problem

                  Comment

                    #10
                    My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

                    Hi Wavey and glad you're back with a plan. Zennie's right on about the healing bit--very important all around. All the best.
                    btw -- you are a handsome dude--I bet you clean up nice.
                    Psalms 119:45


                    ?Start by doing what is necessary, then what is possible, and suddenly you are doing the impossible.?

                    St. Francis of Assisi



                    I'm not perfect, never will be, but better than I was and not as good as I'm going to be.

                    :rays:

                    Comment

                      #11
                      My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

                      Hi David and welcome back.

                      Glad to see you have a plan. Stick to it, and stay close to here for support and encouragement. I know you can do it!!

                      K9
                      :heart:I love my daughter more than alcohol:heart:

                      Believe in yourself. You are stronger than you think.

                      Comment

                        #12
                        My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

                        Hi David, good luck man, you can do it, today is my first day of cutting down from 2 bottles of red wine a night, i relate to so much that you wrote at the beginning, stay in touch.

                        Comment

                          #13
                          My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

                          Hi wavey good to see you back, Keep posting and in contact with the boards here,there invalueble in helping us beat this monster.


                          :congratulatory: Clean & Sober since 13/01/2009 :congratulatory:

                          Until one is committed there is always hesitant thoughts.
                          I know enough to know that I don't know enough.

                          This signature has been typed in front of a live studio audience.

                          Comment

                            #14
                            My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

                            Happy Monday! You can do it. In the end I was pouring drinks first thing in the morning and couldn't manage a single sober day. And now it's been over 3 years AF. If I can do it, and all thsse other people here can do it, you can do it too. It is so awesome to be back in charge of life rather than AL running everything.

                            DG
                            Sobriety Date = 5/22/08
                            Nicotine Free Date = 2/27/07

                            One day at a time.

                            Comment

                              #15
                              My Plan (and a bit of ranting)

                              Waves,

                              Don't forget yer https://www.mywayout.org/community/f1...box-27556.html

                              'I am part of all that I have met, yet all experience is an arch wherethro', gleams that untravelled world whose margins fade, forever and forever when I move'

                              Zen soul Warrior. Freedom today-

                              Comment

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