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    #16
    Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

    I don't think that there is such thing as normal drinking. Any drinking is abnormal.
    I quit drinking on March 8, 2020. Taking it One Day At A Time and no more taking my quit for granted.

    Also doing it for me. I got to stay sober for me.

    Just consecrate on today and do what you can to remain sober for today and worry about staying sober tomorrow, tomorrow.

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      #17
      Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

      Interesting thread. I thought I'd pop on with my two cents since I am part of the long term modders club. I came to MWO because I could not drink responsibly at a party if my life depended on it. I did not know how to control this. I came on here and realized that I cannot drink in those situations but I have no problem having one or two glasses of wine on the weekends. I believe that we all have varying degrees of "problems". Some cannot drink at all, some cannot drink at parties, etc. We need to find what those triggers are and use our tools to control them. I have discovered what I need to do and I am happy with the goals I have put in place for myself and I am doing fine. I am not kidding myself. Believe me, I have looked long and hard at myself in the mirror. It truly is an individual decision and we must make the choices that are best for us.
      "What's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding." Elvis Costello

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        #18
        Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

        Well, I think a healthy debate is interesting........

        You either are or are not addicted to alcohol
        Ann, Vale actually argues that almost anyone who drinks alcohol is addicted while they drink it and that most struggle to control it.

        Coffee, sugar, etc........I just don't see how those could be in the same category - if so, then even food in general could be called addictive. I read once that there's something in mother's milk that addicts a baby so it will feed. So, we do have survival mechanisms built in that cause us to crave things that will help us survive. But alcohol is destructive to our cells and toxic to our blood. Just because we can "get by" with drinking a little of it, doesn't mean it's good on any level. And, humans have done a lot of things since the beginning of time that we would say should never be condoned - infantacide, incest.......just to name a few.

        Obviously there will be no banning of alcohol.........people need it because they're addicted. Prohibition didn't bring about organized crime because people just wanted a toast at a wedding once a year.......IT'S A DRUG PEOPLE............ I think someday it will be viewed as cigarettes are now.

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          #19
          Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

          mightymite;1243947 wrote: Interesting thread. I thought I'd pop on with my two cents since I am part of the long term modders club. I came to MWO because I could not drink responsibly at a party if my life depended on it. I did not know how to control this. I came on here and realized that I cannot drink in those situations but I have no problem having one or two glasses of wine on the weekends. I believe that we all have varying degrees of "problems". Some cannot drink at all, some cannot drink at parties, etc. We need to find what those triggers are and use our tools to control them. I have discovered what I need to do and I am happy with the goals I have put in place for myself and I am doing fine. I am not kidding myself. Believe me, I have looked long and hard at myself in the mirror. It truly is an individual decision and we must make the choices that are best for us.
          I'm glad you found what works for you. I wasn't trying to bash modders, and I believe you looked at your problem long and hard. My only question would be why do you need to drink after it has caused you problems in the past? What about drinking is so important to you that you feel it is necessary in your life?

          If your problem is solved, and you can completely moderate in every situation without having to think about it congratulations, and more power to you.

          Comment


            #20
            Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

            Thank you so much for all your input. Society really condones drinking alcohol. I, myself, have fallen victim to the hype that better enjoyment of any situation involves alcohol. I ask myself why I still on MWO and striving to give up alcohol when I claim to be a mild drinker and by many of our moderating friends on this site, I am; even at my worst. But there is something at the core of my being that is reminding me that:
            1. a few glasses of wine aren't worth their calories in enjoyment
            2. unless I stop, I will drive myself crazy with obsessively thinking about it
            3. I used to be the life of the party at 18 and I only started drinking in my mid-twenties
            4. drinking wine does NOT quench my thirst; in fact it does the opposite
            5. I still feel a little groggy the next day when I only have two
            6. when I am indulging in my 'moderate drinking' or not drinking, looking at the faces of my drinking friends reminds me of what I am not aware of in myself when I drink a few extra
            7. I keep an eye on the wine bottle to ensure I get my share; I don't do that with coffee, tea, juice, etc.

            I believe that this thread and so many others are the steps that many of us need to reach the place where we are SURE and COMMITTED to not drinking. We need to remind ourselves that coming on here for the rest of our lives and reporting on our progress is not what we envisioned for ourselves. Eventually, my aim is to be one of the abstainers who help others.

            Once this crutch has been tossed aside, I will have lots of time and energy to actually make a difference in my little world. Hell, I'm 55. Life is moving along. I want to reach the turning point and I hope it's soon. It's all up to me. Instead of just talking the talk, my goal is to walk the walk ... or stop the talk.

            Food for thought.
            Tipplerette

            I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

            "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
            ? Lao-Tzu

            Comment


              #21
              Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

              I think if you have a hinting suspicion based on your past actions that you are one of the 10-13% of people who are prone to alcoholism then alcohol in any amount is certainly NOT for US.

              If you never had a problem, drink only rarely and almost never drink to excess then you are part of the rest of mankind where alcohol isn't most likely going to ruin your life. Those people can't relate to those of us and say things like, "why don't you just cut down" etc.

              So I don't think it is really either/or but rather knowing yourself and which camp did you belong too perhaps.
              **************
              Baclofen Benefits: https://www.mywayout.org/community/f20/baclofen-benefits-45389.html

              :bagdude: "It is our attitude at the beginning of a difficult undertaking which more than anything else, will determine its successful outcome."-Williams James

              Comment


                #22
                Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

                Good post Tip!

                I think another thing that might help some people out is if we were to turn it around alittle.

                Is being sober abnormal? Too many times we like to focus on the negative. This goes back to an earlier post about deprivation. Saying "I can not drink", is a lie and it also makes you believe that you are depriving yourself of something. Instead of focusing on negatives, how about changing your statement to I will stay sober. I know it's just semantics, but the brain listens to semantics. Instead of giving yourself this huge task of not drinking change it to taking a facinating journey to find what the joy of sobriety can be in all situations. When you can change your thinking it is easier to change your actions.

                Comment


                  #23
                  Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

                  Unwasted;1243948 wrote: Well, I think a healthy debate is interesting........



                  Ann, Vale actually argues that almost anyone who drinks alcohol is addicted while they drink it and that most struggle to control it.

                  Coffee, sugar, etc........I just don't see how those could be in the same category - if so, then even food in general could be called addictive. I read once that there's something in mother's milk that addicts a baby so it will feed. So, we do have survival mechanisms built in that cause us to crave things that will help us survive. But alcohol is destructive to our cells and toxic to our blood. Just because we can "get by" with drinking a little of it, doesn't mean it's good on any level. And, humans have done a lot of things since the beginning of time that we would say should never be condoned - infantacide, incest.......just to name a few.

                  Obviously there will be no banning of alcohol.........people need it because they're addicted. Prohibition didn't bring about organized crime because people just wanted a toast at a wedding once a year.......IT'S A DRUG PEOPLE............ I think someday it will be viewed as cigarettes are now.
                  Hi Unwasted, my point about caffeine and refined sugar as two example were to show that they could both be considered poisons/toxins in so much as over use can cause addictive behaviour and health problems. I wasnt trying to compare them to the damage alcohol causes, although some obesity experts might beg to differ, just making the point that lots of things are bad for us if taken in excess, to differing degrees. If someone can have two glasses of wine with dinner and leave it at that, who am I to say that is wrong and they are poisoning themselves anymore than my commenting on someone drinking 8 cups of strong coffee and 6 donuts a day.
                  Unfortunately they way in which AL is advertised and portrayed currently by society will only lead more people to addiction as I see it.
                  Ethanol is a toxic chemical, why would I drink it?

                  Comment


                    #24
                    Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

                    To answer your question Supercrew, I no longer participate in the events where AL caused problems for me and I don't consider it a need nor a necessity in my life. I enjoy a few glasses of wine on the weekends and that's it. Pure and simple. Those few glasses do not cause problems for me. If they did, I would be AF. I have a very healthy life. I eat well, exercise 7 days a week, some of those days I go to the gym twice, and I keep my calories around 1500/day. I am almost down to my goal weight after the yummy food over the holidays. AL does not get in the way of a healthy lifestyle for me But do know, that I am forever vigilant and that is why I come on here to be reminded of what it is like for some people.
                    "What's so funny 'bout peace, love and understanding." Elvis Costello

                    Comment


                      #25
                      Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

                      Thanks for the reply MM! I think it is awesome that you have found a happy medium where alcohol no longer causes you problems. And I think it shows how we are all different. What one might consider a problem for themselves, another person might look at it as a blessing.

                      And example would be my wife, who is very thin and fit. But in her mind she has a problem with food because she will occasionally go over her goal weight by indulging in a piece of chocolate or an additional roll with butter at dinner. If a heavier person ever heard her complain about her overeating issue they would think she is an anorexic nut case because she is so fit. But she is so fit because she holds herself to a very high standard. So I understand why our problems may not all be the same, but if we perceive them as problems then they are just as real as anyone elses.

                      Comment


                        #26
                        Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

                        If someone can have two glasses of wine with dinner and leave it at that, who am I to say that is wrong and they are poisoning themselves anymore than my commenting on someone drinking 8 cups of strong coffee and 6 donuts a day.
                        Point well taken KTAB, but I still say there's no comparing food to drugs even though both can be abused. We could also eat 50 bananas a day and that would be bad for us. To me, alcohol is in the category of cocaine and heroin, not sugar and coffee.

                        But, I appreciate your viewpoint and agree that people can harm themselves in many different ways.

                        Comment


                          #27
                          Normal Drinking: Fact or Fiction?

                          Supercrew;1243984 wrote: Good post Tip!

                          I think another thing that might help some people out is if we were to turn it around alittle.

                          Is being sober abnormal? Too many times we like to focus on the negative. This goes back to an earlier post about deprivation. Saying "I can not drink", is a lie and it also makes you believe that you are depriving yourself of something. Instead of focusing on negatives, how about changing your statement to I will stay sober. I know it's just semantics, but the brain listens to semantics. Instead of giving yourself this huge task of not drinking change it to taking a facinating journey to find what the joy of sobriety can be in all situations. When you can change your thinking it is easier to change your actions.
                          Love it!! I am going to discover the JOY of SOBRIETY !! That appeals to me whereas denial of wine just pisses me off. LOL.

                          I have always been attracted to doing, exploring and indulging in hedonistic behaviour and I think my mind can learn to categorize 'inviting the joy of sobriety' as a hedonistic endeavour. Doing something for the pleasure of experiencing it is something I am known for. Making campfires in the backyard, cooking a huge spread of delicious food for no special occasion, flying around on the back of a Harley, kayaking on the river, embracing sobriety are all joyful experiences... maybe I'll get some material for that novel I am itching to write...

                          Thanks ... again.. there is a huge depth of insight on this site and for that I am grateful.:h
                          Tipplerette

                          I do this for my children, my grandchildren, my health, my peace of mind, and mostly for the opportunity to learn to live with my true, unfiltered, clear-headed, vulnerable self.

                          "If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."
                          ? Lao-Tzu

                          Comment

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