Starting Over...

[briseus]

Starting Over...

I know Mama.
I don't even want to drink today. Although I'm sure that'll change later on. I just want the shitty feelings to go away.
I'll figure out something to do today.

I need to keep reminding myself that sober IS better.

[Destiniey]

Starting Over...

Hey Bri....so glad to have you back...and YES....you were missed!!!!! I have had more day 1s than I care to recall and I have learned that it is best to not beat the crap out of yourself but rather learn from them. It takes time to realize what is going to work for YOU to stay AF. Think about how great you did before this past weekend. Think of all the AF days you had and realize that you can do it again. You came on here and posted and were honest about the AL...that right there shows how strong you are!!!! You can do it! Hugs to you!!!!!

[K9Lover]

Starting Over...

Hi Bri!

I missed you!!! I definitely noticed you were "away" and was thinking about you. Anyway, glad you're back...now, no more wondering off ok???

Do you know HOW many times I started over??? OMG, I have been doing this for at least 7 years, the counting of AF days (being proud when I had 2 per month!). Every Sunday night swearing to myself that I'd go all week AF...then by Monday night I was buying my 12pack...then figuring the week was shot so what the hell... I have at least 7 calendars with little marks on my AF days...believe me, they were few and far between! My long-winded point is this: Very few (if any) of us got this right on our first or fiftieth time. As long as you never give up, you haven't lost the battle.

You will get to the point where being sober is worth SO much more than any stupid old drink. You may be there already...sounds like it Stay busy the first week. Take a bath with epsom salt in it, read a book, polish your nails, put on a facial mask, whatever it takes to stay busy... you'll get through it.

Keep us posted on how you are.....and STAY CLOSE!!!

Love,
K9

[briseus]

Starting Over...

Thanks D and K9.
I definitely need to NOT beat myself up and learn from my mistakes - for sure. I can't live in the past and worry about the future...I need to be in the now and right now I am not drinking.

If it were that easy - to quit on the first try, there would be no alcoholics...you're right K9.

This time (I know I keep saying that) I really need to have some sober time under my belt for my health. I am such a hypochondriac that now when I am beginning to feel the physical after effects of my drinking it scares the crap out of me.

I won't wander off again.

[K9Lover]

Starting Over...

Bri -

Just a thought, when you go to your doctor, can you request Antabuse? It will get you off the "roller-coaster"...you just CAN'T drink. I've found that once the inner battle is gone, acceptance and peace come fairly quickly. I've been on Antabuse all year (plus on and off previously), so I can answer any questions if you want!!

K9

[mama bear]

Starting Over...

is that you in your pic Bri
and ditto K9 (as usual) on the AB

[Wagoneer]

Starting Over...

Hey Bri - we haven't talked but I understand where you are coming from. My screen name "Wagoneer" is because I have been on and off the stupid wagon so many times. I went sober 11 months a few months back and blew it. Not binging or anything, but a few wines here and there - enough to want to smack myself upside the head. I have really struggled STAYING AL-free. It's hard. And it's harder everytime you fall off and go back on. It's hard when the husband doesn't think I have a problem. Or he doesn't care. Not sure which right now!! I am still struggling though. The people here are amazingly wonderful and I thank my lucky stars to call them my friends. Angels they are. We are all one drink away from day one and we are all in this together. Best wishes and positive thoughts going out to you!

Your new friend, Waggy

[briseus]

Starting Over...

K9 - I once considered Antabuse...but now don't...I don't know why and I can't seem to explain it. Maybe it is something I could look into again.

Mama - No, that's not me. It's a model; Karlie Kloss.

Wagoneer - Congratulations on getting to 11 months! How did that feel? Probably amazing. Yes, it is very hard to have to struggle with this...my boyfriend doesn't think I am an alcoholic...that I just abuse it so it is hard to stay sober at times when the weekend rolls around and my addictive voice plays around with me and then he agrees that I can have some wine or whatever too on Saturday evenings.
I guess I just have to focus on RIGHT NOW. Not the past and not the future...keep going with your sobriety.
Your new friend, Bri.


Well...I actually did it. I got my butt out of bed and cleaned and did lots around my apartment...and I went to the gym. Now I feel like jello but I feel great that I went (despite feeling very foggy).
Does anyone else get the foggy feeling in early sobriety? Or the day after a big binge?

[K9Lover]

Starting Over...

Hi Bri!

I would definitely consider the AB...I know it's kind of scary (at first), but believe me, you will get used to it and it literally has saved my life!

As for the foggy feeling...oh yes, I had that every single day after bingeing...and also the first week or so of sobriety. It will take a while for the alcohol to clear out. Be patient with your body and let it heal.

Congrats on getting some stuff done today, that's more that I ever would have done on a hangover day. Just think, each day that passes, it will get better and easier!

K9

[mama bear]

Starting Over...

dang girl...you rock with a hangover....now imagine un hung days!!!
the fog will lift....I promise

[briseus]

Starting Over...

Glad to hear the brain fog will 'dissipate'. It can definitely be annoying - like you're out of touch with reality (correct?).

Well...just made dinner, did the dishes and went for a 45 minute walk with the boyfriend, watered the garden and now off to do some laundry before taking a relaxing bath and bed time.
I am still sober! YAY!

Hope everyone else is doing well.
xo