ONE more time - my journal

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

:hallo: Nora & Bridge! And, Happy New Year to you.

Yep, I'm happy to report "It lives!"
Spent an hour at the barn (at -20C) and feeling almost human again

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

Nasty snow storm out tonight, roads were icky... but I'm glad I went to the Friday night meeting Made it there and back in one piece and feel a sense of peace. I'm liking this!

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

The universe has a strange sense of humour, sometimes.

While I very much like the people in AA, the concentrated wisdom at meetings, and the general openness... my biggest concern was and is the 'God of my understanding'.

I can't even put my finger on WHY this seems to be such a big hurdle for me, aside from my distaste for organized religon. I can acknowledge creation (perhaps not a creator) and very much believe in Energy and that we are essentially all energy, etc.

Tonight, I must wonder, though, if someone, somewhere is trying to tell me something :H

I have heard Rabbi Brian Zachary Mayer several times in interviews on CBC radio... a sharp, intelligent, very funny man.. even if a clergy man. The last time I heard him, I was baking Christmas cookies and remember putting down the dough and laughing out loud. I decided then, that I ought to look him up online. Which is what I did tonight. The tag line of his website is "Religion outside the box empowers adults to find and be with (the) God (of their understanding) :H

And, the podcast I just listened to, incorporated 2 AA statements (accept what we cannot control, and 'let go and let god'). Hmmmm. Maybe even I can get there, if I just think outside the box. We shall see.

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

Very exciting day work wise... nope, no big windfall... actually spent some money :H But, what a discovery! Days... no WEEKS of creating videos fun.. and it'll help business at some point, too

My head is full and I'm starting to see double (for perfectly acceptable reasons)... time to call it a day! Been a while since I've been this excited about anything! Thank you, universe.

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

Well, it's been a heck of a week or two but I'm feeling myself run out of steam That's OK. I got much done and learned a ton... if I need to slow it down a bit, that's alright.

Looking forward to tomorrow's meeting - and even more so, the 'after meeting'. Tomorrow, we're starting to set the Wednesday Women's group on a path to becoming a recognized AA group. I'm grateful to be a part of it and help put it together.

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

GREAT meeting tonight. 2 5-year celebrations. I'm so happy to be a part/witness to that.

[Rusty]

ONE more time - my journal

I'm happy for you, GG! I'm sure you keeping everyone in your AA group laughing their heads off with your wonderfully silly antics.:h I've been traveling, and I am right now on my way back to Chicago from Idaho and then off to Boston. Hope you and Mr. Sun and the kids and Peanutkins are doing well.

[K9Lover]

ONE more time - my journal

Hi Sunnybutt! I am enjoying your journal, you sound great!! Keep up your great work you beautiful lady. I am proud of you :l

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

:l Thank you, Niners! (And congrats on your flourishing romance!)

It's been a good week. I was able to be sober and present and drive out to my son and spend the evening with him, talking him down from his ledge. For that, I am grateful.

I have also told 2 more people about my journey into AA; one of my best friends who's currently in Florida (snow birds), and one of my step sons. My dear friend was super happy for me... sighed and said she wished her daughter would join me. My step son, looked surprised, shrugged and said.. cool! The main reason I told him is because he's temporarily living at his mom's, and she's always looking over her shoulder when we talk on the phone, so not to give up my 'secret'... that's just silly Of course, he knows that both her and her partner are long time AAers.

So, it's all good. I may actually attempt starting on step 4 today. It's time, even though I'm not exactly sure where or how to start.

[j-vo]

ONE more time - my journal

Congratulations on your success, Sunshine! It's so awesome to see you are finding your way out!

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

Whew. Rough day/night.

Pretty much put my truck in the ditch again, while managing to jack up the back on a tree stump. After unsuccessfully trying to get myself free, had to get Mr. Sun to rescue me. See? I can do idiotic things even when sober

Got phone call at 11:30pm from son, ready to 'blow his head off'. The love of his life and mother of his son (who kicked him out last year around the same time, then coaxed him back end of last summer) has been unhappy with him again. And last night, he stumbled upon the fact that she was so unhappy that she slept with one of his friends. He was beyond frantic and I was honestly afraid of what he might do. They are/were renting her mother's house and there are still tons of guns in the house (belonging to the parents). Anyways.. I got on the road (1 hour drive) and got him out of there... brought him back here. Saving grace? I was sober and present and able to jump in. Grateful for that.

[byebyebridgetjones]

ONE more time - my journal

Jaysus Sunny!

Thank God you were sober and able to help.
All those guns though

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

Thanks Bridge... yeah, not a good thought. I don't think my kid should ever be around guns. Well, as things are he will soon no longer have access to them.

I've actually had 2 very, VERY late nights in a row. Late last night, I got a message from an AA friend that her dog had ran away. A 7 month old English Mastiff pup. Doesn't look much like a pup but is, none the less. It was -38 Celsius last night. My friend had been out of town all day and was on her way home. Someone had been checking on the dogs and letting them out for a pee when Reba took off.

So, I ended up arming myself with a spotlight and a leash and drove out there to join the search. We (she, actually) finally found her around 1am... in the middle of a field, wayyyyy the hell out there. I had no snow shoes and by that time my light had given out, so I couldn't get there. I went back to the house, got her partner... we rigged up a 'sled' from a wooden crate and he went out... I stayed in the house where their 6 year old son was sleeping. Oh.. and comforted their other dog.. she didn't like what was going on, either

She's ok (the pup, and my friend, too) - she was just exhausted and stiff from being out in the cold since 6:30pm. Anyhow, it was 2am by the time I got home.. and again... I was sober and able to help in whatever little way I could. I really am very glad and grateful for that.

[sunshine_gg]

ONE more time - my journal

Oh.. almost forgot
And, I had a wonderful women's meeting tonight, which marks 90 days for me.

[FlyAway]

ONE more time - my journal

I just love those moments when we reflect and realize what we are capable of doing without alcohol. Sobriety is a true gift. :h