Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

[abcowboy]

Way to go on getting that first week in Frances! As you know it is a progressive disease, but so is being sober, it gets easier and easier as time goes by!

[Mulburry]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

I keep thinking how being a "functioning" alcoholic has been a very large part of why I keep fooling myself. I've been reading other posts today about the progressive nature of this disease. I always shock myself when I start to get into this mode of starting drinking earlier and earlier in the day, etc. - that's what brought me back here yet again. I'm hopeful I can do better.

Yup, same with me; looking back on it now it boggles my mind how I actually managed to "function" through so much of this nightmare, and how completely deluded I was. I was at a similar point as you were and when I should have bared down and quit I eased into drinking every night, and that turned into a complete nightmare (I'm still heavily paying with my health and mental health). So do yourself a favor and don't go down my road and quit while you're ahead (easier said than done, I know all too well).

[frances]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Day 15 here - getting easier for sure. It is never far from my mind though, I admit. Drinking lots of seltzer and tea and snacking to fill the void.

[Change]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

G'day everyone... Slo, Frances, Mulbury and abcowboy... Sorry if i have left any recent contributors out.

quit trying to drink moderately.

Yes, we've all tried this countless times and if you have the addictive gene from the gene pool, then moderation doesn't exist.

(like I have) trying to fool themselves that this can get under control. Don't be fooled.

I think the very nature of alcohol, a central nervous system depressant makes control impossible. Even if you can't come over the top of it and feel like a hero, you can still live your life in a humble way and choose not to drink. As we go on this journey and begin to notice new things, our interest in evil Al will lessen, as we develop new habits and interests.

What are some things that you are all interested in? Eg, reading, gardening, exercising, cooking, other?

Day 15 here - getting easier for sure. It is never far from my mind though, I admit. Drinking lots of seltzer and tea and snacking to fill the void.

There is a thread somewhere on this forum about sitting with your emotional states and letting it pass through (or over?) you. I'll try to find it over the weekend and update this thread with a link. I think it might have been in the Toolbox and it would have been in the first three pages of the thread.

On day 2 here. Day 1 wasn't that hard, because I felt so seedy from the night before, so I mooched around feeling sorry for myself all day. Day 2 getting the headaches and nausea at work. Didn't get much sleep either, so feeling pretty tired tonight, and planning on an early moochy night in bed with a good book and a movie. Got triggered by a family member tonight, but fought the cravings to run to my safe-haven, and let the anxiety pass, which I think is something I read from somebody else in another thread.

So, what's on for tomorrow people? Any plans?

[Change]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Hi frances,

The forum wouldn't let me edit my previous post... I just wanted to let you know the info I was referring to is on page 1 of the Toolbox and it's the one about "urge surfing" by Work in Progress.

[crocster]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Hello all, I'm back here after 6 years away. Serial quitter for the last 15 years at least. I quit for 3 months some years ago. Then I started having thoughts of "Is this all there is?". I was comfortably sober but some things I thought would naturally flow from removing from my life 10 bottles of wine a week didn't happen. High on the list for me was losing some weight (I need to lose 25KG). In those days I subscribed to the "calories in - calories out" model and I just assumed that subtracting around 6000 calories a week, even if I did nothing else, would result in steady weight loss . I'm now aware of the value of low carb and Intermittant fasting and have had some success with that.

Apart from the sharing of experience and the support, this forum introduced me to baclofen and I read Amiesen's book and was lucky to have a doctor who supported my trying it. I found it very helpful in anxiety reduction which is the main reason I drink but I never titrated up to "extinction". I will be using it again this time when the inevitable urges return. I am a "functioning" alcoholic I guess. My urges come in the afternoon around 4.30 and baclofen does help. My level of drinking hasn't really changed in 25 years. I'm not a binge drinker. Just feel a need to go to my happy place most afternoons. Which means about a bottle and a half of white wine.

I had a sober week last week but took up again on friday and saturday night. Planning on having something to do next weekend which will help with those urges. Movie or dinner out maybe.

Best wishes to all here. Hope we can all let go of the tiger's tail together.

[abcowboy]

Great to have you back [MENTION=14374]crocster[/MENTION]!

[frances]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Thank you, I will look at that!

[frances]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

I hear you about not losing weight when it's expected! I am so disappointed after 27 days that I haven't lost any weight. But feeling much better and clearer and, I was thinking recently, I really feel much more confident and secure, which seems odd. Drinking helps me relax in social situations but then I think I felt ashamed and hungover and was never very confident. I definitely feel more confident when I'm clear headed.

crocster - my daughter has anxiety and I see her drinking more and more (she's only 21). I'm hoping she doesn't get into a situation she regrets. And I feel like a hypocrite trying to talk to her about it after all the years she's seen me open the wine every day.

Hope you're all doing well!

[Mulburry]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

I hear you about not losing weight when it's expected! I am so disappointed after 27 days that I haven't lost any weight.

It's funny, for me it was the opposite. I was trying to eat a little bit healthier after I quit drinking, but not specifically trying to lose weight, and then I realized I'd lost 50 lbs over five months. Though I didn't do anything too drastic, no massive wholesale diet change, basically I just tried to eat a bit more of the "good" foods (ie fruits and veggies) and a bit less of "bad" foods (carbs, sugars etc.). Aside from losing all those booze calories, cutting out binge eating fueled by the combination of booze and cannibis, I think really helped too. My health not improving as fast as I'd hoped was certainly a motivating factor in trying to live healthier in general.

[Change]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Hey everyone, I'm glad i'm not in here alone! I hope you're all doing well and being kind to yourself.

I found it very helpful in anxiety reduction

I had/ve massive problems with anxiety, so have faced it full on without booze. Have had a few really rough days, but still haven't drank and don't really want to. I don't know whether you've had your bloods and a general check-up done lately, but you wouldn't want to put yourself into prime position for diabetes or heart problems.

carbs, sugars etc.

So hard to give up! Well done on the losing a bit of weight so far. The best and easiest way I've found so far is cutting carbs, sugar and trans-fatty foods, which are usually carbs and sugar based anyway.

Changing eating patterns is so hard sometimes though. My brain craves fish & chips, but then I have to stop and realise too much salt, trans fats and i'm on a low cholesterol diet. Attempting it anyway. Nuts and seeds are a good substitute.

I am so disappointed after 27 days that I haven't lost any weight.
....my daughter has anxiety and I see her drinking more and more (she's only 21).
...And I feel like a hypocrite trying to talk to her about it after all the years she's seen me open the wine every day.

If you're female and when you're over a certain age (around 40-45?), or in the menopausal stage, weight loss is something you have to consciously work on, it doesn't just happen like it used to when we were twenty! I reckon by cutting down on sugar and carbs and increasing your exercise, you would lose weight.

Hope you're all doing well!

Yes, getting there! Still don't feel that exuberant excitement about "life" though, but maybe that will change. Actually content just to relax, heal and not put much pressure on myself right now. Hope you're all doing the same.

[crocster]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

crocster - my daughter has anxiety and I see her drinking more and more (she's only 21). I'm hoping she doesn't get into a situation she regrets. And I feel like a hypocrite trying to talk to her about it after all the years she's seen me open the wine every day.

frances - my step daughter is the same. I see her drinking almost daily to deal with anxiety. Recently I have been totally honest with her about my history, my drinking and the reasons for it as I see it anyway. It has been liberating for both of us I think. So much shame for me around drinking. I rarely drink more than a glass of wine in public but when the front door closes it's game on. She has opened up to me about her drinking and I'm happy to say she's seeing a counsellor to help her deal with past trauma.

[crocster]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

I had/ve massive problems with anxiety, so have faced it full on without booze. Have had a few really rough days, but still haven't drank and don't really want to. I don't know whether you've had your bloods and a general check-up done lately, but you wouldn't want to put yourself into prime position for diabetes or heart problems.

Yes change, I've had an annual check with bloods for many years now. I've been surprised and relieved at the good results I've got considering the level of my lifelong anxiety and my coping methods. Even had a Fibroscan for liver fibrosis last year and came back with a zero score? I've been drinking heavily for 46 years? So I've been able to give myself a pass on the obesity, sleep apnoea and fatty liver because all the tests say I'm travelling OK with the harm minimisation I do.

Until I got a Coronary Calcium Score done 12 months ago. A score of zero is ideal, up to 100 lifestyle changes and monitor, 500 is a serious high score - I scored 2100! - it absolutely floored me - I was in shock for a few weeks - then I started to research it several hours a day - discovered Dr William Davis, Ford Brewer and Cywes and started to follow their advice - I've always been low carb/keto but added in their suggested supplements and lifestyle advice - I still can't believe it but have to accept and live with it and make the best of my life - I feel like I've got a hand grenade in my chest - I'm angry with my doctor not suggesting this test many years ago when he knew my issues - I had to discover the test online and request it - the calcification is not reversable so I just have to make the best of a bad situation -

My advice to anyone here over 40 would be to talk to your doctor about getting the test done. The earlier you know how you're travelling to sooner you can do something to halt or slow it. Google "Ivor Cummins calcium score" for a full discussion.

[crocster]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Sorry change and frances - I need to learn the reply interface so my quotes are correctly attributed

[Change]

Re: Anyone in the First Week of Their Unpteenth Quit?

Y
Until I got a Coronary Calcium Score done 12 months ago. A score of zero is ideal, up to 100 lifestyle changes and monitor, 500 is a serious high score - I scored 2100! - it absolutely floored me - I was in shock for a few weeks - then I started to research it several hours a day - discovered Dr William Davis, Ford Brewer and Cywes and started to follow their advice - I've always been low carb/keto but added in their suggested supplements and lifestyle advice - I still can't believe it but have to accept and live with it and make the best of my life - I feel like I've got a hand grenade in my chest - I'm angry with my doctor not suggesting this test many years ago when he knew my issues - I had to discover the test online and request it - the calcification is not reversable so I just have to make the best of a bad situation -

My advice to anyone here over 40 would be to talk to your doctor about getting the test done. The earlier you know how you're travelling to sooner you can do something to halt or slow it. Google "Ivor Cummins calcium score" for a full discussion.

I'm sorry to hear this crocster, but it sounds like you're committed to following a healthy diet and taking precautions.

I went in for a routine blood test and dr suggested an electrocardiogram while I was there. The reading has revealed a couple of abnormalities, and an old "possible anterior infarction", which is kind of scary... Makes sense, as I've had tightness in my chest for years and have felt heart pulpitations while laying down in bed at night. I stupidly put it down to stress, or other muscle pain. Am currently waiting for the more extensive test in 1.5 weeks. Hopefully there is not too much damage done and whatever it is, is a manageable condition. So, in all that, I can totally relate to that feeling and wake-up call, however, I would also suggest to follow all instructions and look after yourself, and try not ruminate too much, as ruminating won't help you.

I know one thing, I'm spending money on things I want or need without hesitation. I also have a huge level of regret for the crappy life I have chosen to live and hope that I can get to live the life I always wanted without anxiety hanging over my head since I was a teenager and allowing it to dictate EVERY life decision I have made.

Anyhow, today is the day and we must seize it, and not fall into that trap of thinking that everything has to be "perfect" before we launch into life, and the future is a hypothetical construct, in that, the only life we know is this very moment, and each moment unfolds into the next. Let's hope we have a whole lot of amazing / awesome moments that keep rolling on.

I hope your niece can learn to deal with her anxiety in other ways, as 21 is way too young to be drinking daily. There is a good post early in the Toolbox thread that describes the practice of sitting through uncomfortable feelings, or letting them pass through or over you. Those pesky pangs of anxiety can not last forever and it is incredible to think that we perceive the autonomic sensations as "reality" and "fact", when most of the time, it is our perceptions that cause us to react a certain way. Like stress, a tiny, tiny bit of anxiety probably serves evolutionary purposes and might otherwise be good for us, but for those who suffer more than normal anxiety, it is like the anxiety-factory in our brains and bodies is over-sensitive or out of kilter.

Bev Aisbett has written a few books on it: Bev Aisbett's Art of Anxiety - HOME