Hi, I'm new here.
I realised back in March this year that I had a serious alcohol problem. In 22 years, the only days off drinking have been 2 separate (non-alcohol related) periods of a week each in hospital.
I read on someone's post here
"My issue is that the minute I start feeling better, I also think it's okay to have a drink which sends me into my tail spin again"
That is so me!
I think I may have fucked-up so badly yesterday that some things in my life may never be the same again. I've missed my appointment with my Psychiatrist this week and have read another thing on here that is so true - it was someone's quote at the bottom of a post - I am probably mis-quoting it here...
"Relapse starts long before the 1st drink is poured"
I don't know if anyone else finds this but I really relate to it. If I've decided to have a drink then the point at which I visit the bar it's far too late to stop myself from having that drink. The process may have begun when I got out of bed and decided I was NOT going to be alcohol free that day because I can control it (not!) and just have the one drink (never!).
I think that one of the biggest hurdles to overcome is that I have to get to the stage where I accept that I can never have another drink.
Also, I understand fully the need for goals and aims but the thought of 30 days free of drink fills me with fear at the moment.
I realised back in March this year that I had a serious alcohol problem. In 22 years, the only days off drinking have been 2 separate (non-alcohol related) periods of a week each in hospital.
I read on someone's post here
"My issue is that the minute I start feeling better, I also think it's okay to have a drink which sends me into my tail spin again"
That is so me!
I think I may have fucked-up so badly yesterday that some things in my life may never be the same again. I've missed my appointment with my Psychiatrist this week and have read another thing on here that is so true - it was someone's quote at the bottom of a post - I am probably mis-quoting it here...
"Relapse starts long before the 1st drink is poured"
I don't know if anyone else finds this but I really relate to it. If I've decided to have a drink then the point at which I visit the bar it's far too late to stop myself from having that drink. The process may have begun when I got out of bed and decided I was NOT going to be alcohol free that day because I can control it (not!) and just have the one drink (never!).
I think that one of the biggest hurdles to overcome is that I have to get to the stage where I accept that I can never have another drink.
Also, I understand fully the need for goals and aims but the thought of 30 days free of drink fills me with fear at the moment.
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