One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Happy Valentines Day Steppers!

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Happy Valentine's day :heartbeat::heartbeat::heartbeat:

[NoSugar]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Hey, @NoraC

I was about to quit my job 18 months or so ago. I finally stepped back and pretended I was talking to someone else with my "problems". Here's what I asked her:

1. Can any of these really irritating responsibilities be handled as well or better by someone else?
2. Are there jobs I'm not doing that I could perhaps do as well or better than the person who is doing them?
3. Are the deadlines that cause me such angst real or self-imposed invented dumb ideas?
4. Is the way D acts directed at me personally or is he generally an uptight a-hole?

I was able to get rid of some of the ridiculously time-consuming tasks that did not require my education/expertise to do. They were moved to a person who was fully able to do them and who did not experience my extreme level of irritation because she was looking at them from an outside perspective. I was too involved and had my ego wrapped up in the things that were ok - just not meeting my high expectations.

They did give a couple new jobs to me, similar to others I have and that are appropriate given my qualifications.

I had totally made up arbitrary deadlines and was truly the only one who cared. A couple people commented that they wondered if I could actually do a good job so quickly !
(I could but how funny that what I saw as a positive work ethic, others questioned!).

D is absolutely a total butt. I try to listen only to what he means now. Not how it "sounds" to me. He even addresses his bosses in the same way so maybe it is just how he talks and doesn't have all the subtext I assign to it.

It seems like the personality issues are even a bigger deal for you but maybe you could try not to hear what you would mean if you said it "that way". It just might not be what the person actually is trying to communicate.

xx, NS

[bird]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Hi all,
I went to visit my friend with cancer today. He is in the hospital now and has refused food and water. He looks awful. Down to the short time now. Really didn't want to go, but glad I did now..he has lost a great deal of weight in a short time..one of the guys from work showed up at the same time as I so that made it a bit easier...Really, on the way all I could think of was beer. Made it home though...day 8

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Quick note and will catch up with everyone tomorrow.

Bird - so sad about your friend. You are a special person to go there and spend time with him. GREAT JOB on Day 8. Really happy for you.

Thank you all for the good advice. I am so insecure in myself now that it is magnifying everything I think/feel. Misconceptions and miscommunication on both sides. But, I have had a couple of conversations with her. And I have been doing some thinking. NoSugar - great ideas there. Sorry that you were having a hard time at work though. Anyway, I appreciate all the support and I am sorry that I keep going back to this. I feel like such a whiner that doesn't do anything to improve! So, enough of this.

As AG says, Onward.

And speaking of AG - where are you???

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Yea,where are you AG? Nora,its ok to talk it out here,we're all listening I still am having a shitty time sleeping but I quit talking about it cuz I'm sure everyone is done hearing about it,been taking unisom but I swear it makes my head feel weird,don't get great sleep on it anyways,already been to the docs for insomnia,I'm just at a loss now,oh well I'm alive,I'm functioning and I'm sober so I'll take it waves to all and wishes for a happy AF Thursday! Bird,great job on not stopping for beers yesterday!

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Oh well,I was sober for a bit,,I totally lost my shit today

[dill]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

[MENTION=17650]paulywogg[/MENTION], :hug: Do what you can to limit the damage. Get to bed early and get back on track tomorrow!

[NoraC]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Oh Pauly. :sad:

[Jude58]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Yea,where are you AG? Nora,its ok to talk it out here,we're all listening I still am having a shitty time sleeping but I quit talking about it cuz I'm sure everyone is done hearing about it,been taking unisom but I swear it makes my head feel weird,don't get great sleep on it anyways,already been to the docs for insomnia,I'm just at a loss now,oh well I'm alive,I'm functioning and I'm sober so I'll take it waves to all and wishes for a happy AF Thursday! Bird,great job on not stopping for beers yesterday!

Pauly, My doctor prescribed a drug called Trazadone while I was going through withdrawals to ease some of the symptoms and to help me sleep without the use of AL. I'm still using it, and sleep through the night most of the time. I wake up feeling refreshed, with no sleeping pill hangover. (some of the OTC stuff really did a number on me) I take 100 mg every night about a half hour before bed...works like a charm for me. My doc told me that it's not addicting, and given my tendency to get "hooked" on things, that is a plus. Wouldn't hurt to ask your doc about it. Oh and BTW, get back on the damn horse would ya! :happy2:

[bird]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Hi all,
Aww Pauly...well, just keep trying. That is all we can do.......Glassie, hope the speaking goes well. Sounds scary!.....Nora, this is a place we can vent. I have been complaining about my job for years:hug:...oh, and I haven't been getting out to play much......well, off to work soon. May go to morning chat on WFS first. I usually only work hald day on Fri. so it doesn't matter how late I am...friend has been moved to a nursing home. Don't think he will make it through the weekend....cats caught a squirrel which they dragged in and I threw back out. 2 days later they brought it back in. Onlu tail and backbone left. Disgusting. I had to pick it up and throw it ...ugg

[Lizann]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Quick check in for me. Taking my boys to the airport. I promise I'll post more later. Pauly:hug:

[abcowboy]

Pauly, if you promise not to give up on yourself, I'll promise not to give up on you! :hug:

I know how easy it is for your Friday's to go south on you in a big way if you start drinking on Thursday, so throw out any remaining booze, and figure out how you're going to handle things next time. Drinking isn't the answer, but you already know that.....

[techie]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Hi Steppers. I want everyone to find a bit of gratitude today. While many days are tough, there is always something or someone to be grateful for.. Some people make your laugh a little louder, your smile a little brighter and your life a little better. Try to be one of those people. Sending love and hugs to you all. xoxo

P.S. Off to my Dr. in Palo Alto. I’ll let you know about my progress report in a few days!!!

[paulywogg]

Re: One Step at a Time. . . . February 2018

Ugh,I know,I know I just haven't slept right for a month and I think the unisom messed with my thinking,just feel overly groggy,grouchy,no excuses! Techie,it's great to see you and yes we all have something in each day to be grateful for,sometimes it just gets overwhelming,man I was on a roll,I absolutely thought I'd never drink again.....dunno what to say