Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

[kali]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Hi everyone, it's been a long time since I've posted, mostly because I feel like a huge fraud. I've been drinking like a fish for the past two months. I'm so ashamed of myself, and feel like a huge failure. My grand daughter just got back from John Hopkins after her third spinal surgery and the tumor is much larger this time. She will begin chemotherapy in the next few weeks. She is only 10 years old. My niece and brother in law are both in ICU after lung cancer surgery this past week also.
I know this is no excuse for drinking, I need to find a positive way to deal with my life. You all are such a great support to each other. I hope I can find some sort of answer soon.. My life sure isn't working this way. Thank you for this thread.

[kali]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

p.s. tinkerbell is Hannah's favorite...I'm hoping for a miracle for her.

[wakupmom]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

So sorry to hear that Kali.
You really do have a lot on your plate.Well done for coming back.Just stay close xx

[Guest]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Am hoping right along with you kali.
No, we shouldn`t drink.........is never an answer, but sometimes we can be weak when faced with great sadness in our lives.

Praying for your grand daughter, your niece, brother in law and yourself.

All my love,

Starlight Impress x

[kali]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Thank you for the kind words.. I appreciate your support and kindness.

I'm going back to the antabuse, it worked for me before, I just need to be more proactive in my own recovery.

Thanks again.

Jan

[nancy]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Hi Kali

I think it is understandable that you are drinking to cope with this. But the trouble is that alcohol is going to make you even sadder. I guess it lifts you up with an endorphin release intially but then depletes serotonin. So in effect you are going to worsen your sadness about this situation and probably be less able to cope.

I wonder if you can make really super small changes. If you drink every day, drink one day less or start an hour earlier. I am a real believer in small steps toward a larger goal.

You need your mental health to deal with this. And don't feel ashamed, it's a coping mechanism many of us use. And this isn't an AF competition.

[retteacher]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Kali: I second the thought that even though this is a very difficult situation, nothing improves when we drink. I love what Nancy said about separating alcohol from the relief equation. I know I drink to relieve stress, but it doesn't work in the long run. Good luck, Mary

PS: I have grandchildren too. I want to be there for them unimpaired.

[Cinders]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Kali,

What Nancy says is so true, Great saying, Nancy!! This is not an AF competition. We are all winners because we are all trying to help ourselves.

I am so sorry about your granddaughter. I know how much I love my grandchildren and know how heavy that fear would weigh around my heart. Devastating.

On top of that grownups with lung cancer. Geez.

No, the alcohol does not make it better, it actually makes it worse, but it doesn't seem like that at the time when the initial "relief" from stress comes on. Unfortunately, the alcohol ends up increasing the stress in the long run.

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers,
Cindi

[kali]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Thank you all, I feel better now, and I know I need to visit and post more often for this wonderful support system.

I hope you all have a good Sunday. Hannah will need a together grandmother, not a non functioning one! She is fighting for her life, and I guess I better fight formine too.

Thanks again,
Jan

[paula]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Praying for you and your little one.
Love Paula.xx

[slightlysuze]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Kali....wishing you strength and courage for this difficult situation.

Keep coming here.....for support and kindness and friendship.....you can keep your head above water here while you find the right coping strategies for you. :l

Suze XX

[paula]

Newbies in Need ODAT - Sunday Oct. 6th

Hi Kali,
I am so sorry for all your problems, no drinking is not an answer, it just numbs the pain.
Maybe that is not such a bad thing at the time.! But we still have to face up to reality. Which is sometimes more unpleasant, than the reality.
I truly wish you well.
Love Paula.x