Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

[Janice]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

hi cowgal, I do have the cds but haven't listened to them in ages.......they really made a difference as well when I did my first AF spell. Trouble is I'm waiting for this delivery......imagine me opening my front door, I'd be so spaced out!!! I just keep putting the kettle on, don't know how many coffees I've had but still better than what I really want. I need to do this. Thanks cowgal......good luck to you too....... Janicexxx

[MyChoice]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

Your stories are inspiring

Hello all.:new: I finally talked myself into give it a try. All your stories are inspiring. I hope I can stick with decision...or maybe at least learn to control my consumption....the problem is I can't stop if I had more then two...doesn't matter wheather its wine or mixed drink....I hate not being able to contol my drinking, and yet I'm scared to promise my self to stop. My world would be so gray and sad without it. When I'm not drunk I'm shy and reserved and even have difficulties to start a conversation...but I'm drunk I am the heart of the party, I'm funny, I laugh, I have fun and think life is great. I'm sad now, a bit conserned and terrified...
I have been having 1-2 drinks every evening for the past two years...Sometimes I'd get waisted so bad I can't remember conversations I had, or how I got home, or why my husband and I had fight....I don't want to drink to be happy...I just want to be happy with out. :upset:

[Bessie]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

Thanks Rudemama for starting the day's post. So many people rely on it!

Hi My Choice and welcome. Don't be scared or terrified or any of those negative things. Just be happy you have found here and that you will have the best possible support and help to get you where you want to be. Stick around, ask, post and just keep coming back and learning from everybody on here. I can bet that you will learn lots about yourself, how and why and when you drink and how and why and when to avoid it. Everyone does things differently to suit them - total abstinence, moderation, ODAT, using supplements, cds, willpower, whatever whatever - there seem to be lots of ways and loads of love to keep you going. You WILL be happy without alcohol. Almost certainly a lot happier than you thought you could possibly be....!

Bessie xx

[paula]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

Hi My Choice, welcome,most people on these boards can identify with you, myself included.
I have to be af, as if I have one drink it sets the compulsive thoughts off in my head. In my
case one is definitely too many and ten's not enough. I try not to look to tomorrow, because, it never comes, I take it one step at a time, if I feel like drinking I say to myself
I'll wait five minutes, then an hour, and it really does work.
So wishing you well, you can do it if you want it enough.
Love Paula.

[MyChoice]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

Thank you Bessie and Paula for warm welcome. It is truly a great feeling to be understood by someone. Someone you don’t even know. It feels good to say this and not be afraid to be judged. I can’t share my concerns with my friends, now come to this of this – am I really that shallow that I don’t even have friends I can trust?...are they my friends or my drinking gals? Who do I have in this world to trust? I’m 30 and so far I have not built trusworthy friendships around me, you know the kind of friends you read about? Friends that would do everything and anything for you? I have done this for others, but never received it back. How pathetic!! On the surface everything looks just fine – a great job (yes, I love my job!!), an expensive car, a hot handsome hardworking husband, a few of “friends”…If I have all of this, why do I drink? Can you answer? Can someone please answer? Why does it have to be me? And why am I so bored when I come home from work that the only thing I can think about is a glass of wine which will get me buzzing and then I’m not bored anymore. …aghhh.

[Bessie]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

MyChoice - maybe all that you HAVE is not all that you WANT. Having all the things you aspire to (and that others aspire to) is not always that which fulfils you.

Bless you, at 30 maybe you haven't yet had the time to build those precious friendships, especially if you have been working hard on your career, relationship and aspirations. Sometimes those friendships need some hard times to go through before you can establish whether they are 'the ones you read about' and even then they may never be unless you are very lucky. But they are the friendships you have now and can build on. You sound like you are very able to be that sort of good friend - maybe your friends have to just catch up with you .... or you have yet to find the really good ones. Sorry if that sounds at all patronising (I think it does - sorry!) but I so identify with where you are coming from with that one. For years I considered that my friends weren't always going to be solid and there for me and now, having been through a whole bunch of stuff (me and them), I know exactly who my good and solid friends are and they are not the ones you would necessarily choose or expect. They are some oddballs, some straight ones, some old ones, some new ones but when you have them, you know they are there. My hubby is my best one and even he doesn't know the full extent of my problem with alcohol. Sometimes a place like this is just what you need to deal with a specific problem without burdening your friends and building that problem into your relationship. If they don't have your problem how can they help? Even if they do, they might not want to share it. Here we all have the same shit to deal with!! In varying degrees!

At this stage, does it matter too much that you can't talk to them like you can post on here to a bunch of strangers? Here you can just 'talk' about what you want without any worries about us. Anyway, I don't think I have put that the best way but it will have to do for now.

Don't beat yourself up about any of it. Rule no 1 I think you will find!

The boredom and the buzz?.......well, you have it in you to find an alternative. Help will come from here and you have to do a lot of the legwork. Open your mind up to any and all possibilities and don't be afraid. Besides, now you've found this site, it will pretty much take care of your spare time ( or is that just me......??:H )

I've gone on way too long (cos I can type quickly and talk a lot too!!)

Luck and love

Bessie xx
Bessie xx

[Bessie]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

Bessie, Bessie - so good they named her twice!! :H (if only!)

[MyChoice]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

Bessie, you are funny! thank you for kind words they are full of wisdom and sure something to ponder about.

I decided to go rest of the week without drinking. I'm not going to promise myself not to drink on the weekend - that is too much to ask of me right now, but I feel good about decision for the rest of the week - 4 more days....I think Friday will be the most difficult one as all coworkers get toghether in a local bar to say goodbye to the week behind and to welcome the weekend ahead...we'll see.

[Deena]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

That's why this thread is "one day at a time". I set small attainable goals for myself each day, and no one here frowns on me or tells me my goals are silly. Progress is progress, baby steps will eventually grow as I learn to walk without AL as a crutch or an excuse. I don't have 30 days AF, but I am doing great compared to where I was. I have to count that for something, and keep working to improve upon what I have and what I'm doing.

You can do this, you found a great place online for words of wisdom, experience and support. Stick around!

[Choicemood]

Newbies in Need - ODAT - TUESDAY

I'm relatively new and i would be lost with ODAT. Every morning i wake up and if i didnt drink that night i feel very proud of my acheivement. If i have had a drink a just think tonight i will not have any. ODAT

Baby Steps

Choice X