new - needing encouragement

[Seen the light!]

new - needing encouragement

Hi Sausage!

Hang on in there!! _I'm having a bad day too - I feel like everything is on top of me today - my husband is away this week so I'm putting it down to tiredness - he's back tomorrow thank god! I'm just telling myself that I will feel different in the morning - you should do the same if you can!

My drinking situation was that I have not really been a daily drinker although in the last couple of years it's been probably 5 out of 7 days. My biggest time was the weekend - Friday Saturday and Sunday I just drank stupidly then felt really depressed about mysrlf then did it all again the week after! I have tried to control myself over the last few months and have sometimes managed to drink in moderation but it just creeps up on you again. Until now I have not managed to get through a weekend without having a drink so I am hoping I can pull this off.

With regards my hysterectomy - I had it done December of 2006 we had just moved house as well - when I think back to that time it was horrendous! I think I went through the whole of 2007 in a sort of daze (mostly a drunken one!) You are so right about it taking time to heal emotionally - I don't know what the reasons for yours were but I had cervical cancer which was caught very early luckily, so I didn't need any further treatment.

Keep going you'll feel great in the morning for getting through it - I'll check back in later to see how you're doing xx

[SAUSAGE]

new - needing encouragement

Well I've successfully made it through the evening (day 4) but it was not pleasant. Despite going for a cycle ride early on I really really struggled tonight. Drank some non alcoholic sparkling grape juice but didn't really enjoy it - wine would have been much better !! Despite making it through the evening feel quite depressed and low in myself. Off to bed soon, at work on friday. The weekend has its own challenges - tomorrow night will be tough I know (after all it's not unreasonable to have a drink on a fri night) and Sat night am going to a party at one of our neighbours where I know everyone will be drinking.
Good night all, and thanks for the support earlier on.

[Bessie]

new - needing encouragement

Welcome Sausage.:l As the self proclaimed Sausage Queen (it's a long story....!) I felt I just had to welcome you. Hope you do well here. You've certainly come to the right place.

Bessie xxx

[gyco]

new - needing encouragement

hi sausage,quite the name, ahahaha,any one can moderate,you just dont drink as much,same as anyone can stop,but do they want to stay stopped,failure as some say here,including my self is when you dont recognise you have a problem,you do,like me,ive written quite a few threads since june ,som good,none really bad,some others have done the same,thats why we come here because we understand and listen,even sometimes give some suggestions,and sometimes it helps what we say,keep comin here we ill keep tryin to help,gyco

[wonderworld]

new - needing encouragement

Hey Sausage!

Just wanted to see how you were getting on today.
Check in and let us know, okay?
I know yesterday was a tough one - thinking of you!

ww xox

[SAUSAGE]

new - needing encouragement

Hi everyone
Been at work all day and so first chance to log on (don't want to do it at work on my computer between patients!!!)
Tonight's going to be tough - its FRi night and it's not unreasonable to drink on a fri night is it!?
Supports on the 30 day AF thread have suggested I list positive and negative consequences of drinking / not drinking etc to help. Already done this before but i'll keep re-reading list. Have to go and bath my kids now but will check in again later

[livingfree]

new - needing encouragement

Hi Sausage - First - congratulations on making it through this very difficult week. I can't tell you how proud I am of you!!

Second ~ Welcome to your first Friday in your NEW LIFE! I'd like to challenge you today!

(Your saying WHAT?? LIKE THE LAST FEW DAYS HAVEN'T BEEN CHALLENGING E-N-O-U-G-H??!!)

At first we dread weekends ... Fridays esp. BUT I can assure you that Weekends can be the NEW greatest days of your week! Here are some things you have to look forward to on your "new" weekends:

Friday night relaxation with a CLEAR mind, peace in knowing you are at the end of another AF week. CHALLENGE #1 SAY OUT LOUD: "I MADE IT! THIS IS GOING TO BE THE GREATEST DAY OF THE WEEK" Celebrate with your favorite dessert. at your "old" drinking time. Follow with a movie rental. Beauty and the Beast is great and the kids will snuggle up to their Clear minded Mom. They can sense the changes happening. PS: Don't worry about calories for now - we all ate to much sugar in the beginning of our AF days - and this will subside in time!!

Saturday Morning is the greatest reward. Waking up and KNOWING you made it through and you feel better already. The past few days will become the foundation which you can rebuild your AF life. CHALLENGE #2: DO NOT DRINK ON FRIDAY NIGHT ... SO THAT YOU MAY WAKE UP WITH THE SATURDAY REWARD!!

CHALLENGE #3 - Forget everything you "thought" you knew about stopping drinking. Be open and willing to see the failures of the past as lessons learned, but not the past repeating it's self. If we focus on why the AF days you had in the past "ended up right where you left off" .... then you will feel defeated and hopeless that you will just keep hitting "repeat". This is ALL NEW. You are going to learn HOW to deal with the stresses that kept you numbing the evenings away. You are going to discover the possibilities of who you can BE now. You are going to be open and ready to begin a life that you never thought possible! So Challenge # 3 .... Write your "breaking up" letter to AL (alcohol). Put it someplace safe and everytime he tries to weasel his way back into your life -- re-read it. Your relationships with those you really love will grow in amazing ways once you stop this love affair with Alcohol.

So - off to the GREATEST first weekend of your life! Embrace it - Love it and know something "new" is happening to you!!

[SAUSAGE]

new - needing encouragement

living free

Thanks for this inspirational post - really liked it - is making me feel a bit stronger

I love the idea of my "new life"

Still AF tonight and feeling a bit more positive

:thanks:

[boozehag]

new - needing encouragement

Hi Sausage
Friday is just another day the same as all the rest. Dont let AL trick you into thinking it is reward night or anything like that. The true reward is waking up on a Saturday morning not wondering what you drank what you said what you did and with no UDI's (unidentified drunken injuries)! You should reward yourself with something tomorrow (always worked for me) like breakfast out or whatever takes your fancy.
It is already Saturday morning here in NZ and I am up with the larks (not sure if we have any) so I will be sending positivie thoughts your way. Once you do one Friday the others will be a doddle. you can do it.
BH

[wonderworld]

new - needing encouragement

well said boozehag! very well said!

Sausage - what boozehag said ! See what it feels like to wake up Saturday morning with an AF Friday night behind you! It's really something!!! .

You're almost through!!!! Keep it up!!! :goodjob:

ww xox

[SAUSAGE]

new - needing encouragement

I'm through it !! It's only 9.15pm here but I've had my dinner (a curry) and cup of tea and have no desire to drink anything now!! Actually found it much easier than last night in the end (last night was really tough and depressing for some reason). Am so pleased with myself - really feel like i'm into a new life . Tomorrow will be interesting though - am going to a party at one of my neighbours and everyone will be drinking so I'm sure i'll need your help again tomorrow
Thanks everyone !!

[SAUSAGE]

new - needing encouragement

Evening all
Just come back from the party - remained AF but did not enjoy myself - range of non-alcoholic drinks pretty rubbish - had a flat diet coke and later a lemonade. All those on alcohol seemed to be having a great time. I feel good in that I was strong enough to remain AF but miserable that I didn't enjoy myself - at the moment can't relate to all those people that say "life is so much better without alcohol"
Please tell me it will get better 1?!

[LVT25]

new - needing encouragement

Sausage I am so proud that you went to that party and remained AF. You are a strong person. I admit I was concerned when you said you were going to a party so soon. But you did great, girl! It does get easier. :h

[SAUSAGE]

new - needing encouragement

It's the witching hour of day 7 now and i'm here sipping some non alcoholic sparkling grape juice. I definitely think i'm feeling better health wise already ( and lost a couple of pounds in weight too) but I do feel fed up. I guess after a while you can't imagine how rubbish you felt when you drank and this is a very dangerous situation. I'm sitting here thinking - well i've done a whole week (almost) i've even survived the party! Surely I deserve one glass of white wine. I know I mustn't but it doesn't seem fair. And this is where I went wrong on day 109 last time - I thought well If I can do all this time AF then I must be able to moderate - and I know that's wrong. How do people keep going AF when the "horrors" or drinking are further away and you stop remembering how bad / crazy it was?

[A Work in Progress]

new - needing encouragement

How do people keep going AF when the "horrors" or drinking are further away and you stop remembering how bad / crazy it was?

Two things: first, DON'T "stop remembering." Your capacity to search your memory is under YOUR control. Your addicted mind will want to keep bringing up fantasy-land crap about how lovely it would be to have a drink. When you notice that happening, you have a CHOICE. You can engage in the fantasy, get on board that train of thought right on into drinking again... or you can shift your attention to something else. What's the most embarrassing, shameful thing you have done drinking? What's your worst hangover? How did drinking impair you, diminish the quality of your life? You don't have a "memory" problem... you have a CHOICE about where to place your attention.

Second, you can also place your attention on what you HAVE gotten out of not drinking, and what others get out of not drinking, and what you hope to get out of getting the alcohol out of your life.

And OK this is three, not two, things: DO SOMETHING ELSE other than drinking. Take a walk, read a book... you know the deal, you have to have your OWN set of alternative behaviors IN PLACE and ready for these times when you can anticipate you will have cravings/urges/wishes... whatever.

This isn't easy. It isn't something that just "happens." It's a really big project, and it takes some work and planning....

best wishes,

wip