Newbies Nest

[Guitarista]

First you need to stop drinking and you need professional help so what you need to do is go to a 3 day detox and then outpatient therapy" Has anyone experienced this? what is it like? My reaction surprised me…..it was one of relief. so, today, I am going to call the place he recommended and set a date to go….but would be interested in opinions here….

Hello Embrace. Welcome!

Detox facilities here in Australia are typically 6-8 days inpatient, although some hospitals/docs will support someone to do a home detox. In an inpatient detox you would usually be given medication to assist with withdrawals. Re the outpatient therapy, do you know how long that will go for? e.g. is it intensive, or once a week etc? It all sounds positive, so hope you go for it. The problem we see here in Oz often, is that after the detox process, there isn't enough support in place for someone newly sober. There is always AA of course which is useful to many, but i'm talking professional support, post detox. Many of us need some sort of ongoing program to keep us focused when we come out of detox. So either way, the outpatient therapy you mentioned post detox sounds a good thing to try out. I say go, go, go for it. Alcoholism/problem drinking, whatever we call it is powerful, cunning and baffling, so throw everything at it. You will learn something useful from detox and outpatient therapy, even if they seem uncomfortable at first.

This place is another hub of info, inspiration and support. Keep us posted won't you. All the best. G

Congrat's Eloise on 200, and Elvis on 30 days booze free. Yeehaw!!

[Lavande]

Good morning Nesters & happy Friday to all!

Looking forward to a visit from my busy granddaughter today. Nothing like keeping up with a 3 1/2 year old!!!
I have many reasons to be grateful for this AF life & just as many reasons to protect my quit with everything I've got

I hope everyone has their plan set & ready for the weekend!
Picture yourselves happy & sober & do what you have to do

Have a great AF Friday everyone!

Lav

[Elvis]

Thanks Lavande, Pavati, and Guitarista! :guy:

Have a great day everyone!

[Byrdlady]

Good Morning, Nesters!
This morning took off without me! I am still on yesterday's work!

Brace up your Plans for the weekend....every one will be trying to spread holiday cheer on ya, but don't fall for it! Holiday Cheer is spending time with loved ones who matter, NOT what's in your glass! It's only Friday, NOT a ticket to BoozeVille! :haha:

Friday the 5th doesn't mean you get to drink one! eheheheh......stay strong everyone!! Byrdie

[ShoshannaDreyfus]

Brace up your Plans for the weekend....every one will be trying to spread holiday cheer on ya, but don't fall for it! Holiday Cheer is spending time with loved ones who matter, NOT what's in your glass! It's only Friday, NOT a ticket to BoozeVille!

Hi Byrdlady, I'm new here. I couldn't agree more with you. I am determined to be sober this Christmas, my family deserves this and so do I. No more Christmas mornings for me hung over. I want to be 100% there for my kids.

[Matt M.]

Sho
I see you found your way over.
I posted this in the thread you started.
Good luck and welcome!

Welcome Sho! You have come to the right place. Your story is not unique in a freakish way. It fits right in with the rest of us. It sounds like moderating is not an option for you, which in my opinion never seems to work. I myself ran out of ways to " moderate"*
A few suggestions that you will likely hear again
Get involved in the Newbies Nest. Go back as far as you can and read and read. Don't be afraid to post. We don't bite( not hard anyway)*
Look at the Newbies Tool box
Make some kind of plan of Action because it's all about Action.*

There are some strong women in these rooms that can be a great deal of help to you. Many of them are mentors to me.*
look forward to seeing you around as it says in my signature line we can't do this by Ourselves. So lock in and enjoy the ride. Sober living is so good!

[ShoshannaDreyfus]

Thank you Matt! :happy2:

[ShoshannaDreyfus]

Thank you Matt! I've tried to quit so many time. I just cant do it by myself. I'm in the state right now of being a little disappointed in myself that I can't drink normally. This has such a cruel mental twist to it. How long does it take for the train of thought to turn?

[Matt M.]

Speaking of strong mentoring women. You hit the jackpot on this page. Lav and Byrd :wings::angelpals:

[KENSHO]

Rambling thought for the day (feel free to ignore - I just feel the need to unload some thoughts):

At some point I arrived at the realization that drinking does me NO good. Not even a little bit of good. The cons FAR outweigh the pros. I get that - loud and clear. SO it is baffling to me that I am craving it so much. My rational self knows that I would regret any alcohol consumed. It would start with a first drink, and however many more - and then the cons would begin: horrible sleep, sluggish morning, unclear head, confused sense of goals... and then the big ones: health problems, fighting with spouse, yelling at kids, not being there for family and friends, not being as good of a person as I have the potential to be, not really LIVING life.

I GET it. So WHY so I want it?

For me, it's no longer about fighting with myself as to whether I can have any, or about caring what others think of me, or dealing with social situations.... it's about the damn cravings. Somewhere deep in my brain, alcohol has been tagged as a solution to stress. And my lifestyle, like most people, includes a lot of stress. Working late nights, as well as juggling responsibilities of being business owner and mom are my triggers. I don't currently have to deal with some of the tragedies that many of you do, so I can't imagine how much more difficult that would be! I don't see any end in sight for the stress. And I want the cravings to STOP! I can minimize the crazy schedule as much as possible, but this field includes ebbs and flows that are hard to control. I think the only thing I can do at this point is to continue not to drink (the brain WILL begin to forget over time, right??) and to practice more relaxation techniques. I can also exercise more. I think after the holidays, I will try to go back to the diet that worked so well for me with less sugar and crap. I have no rational need to drink now. And it took some work to get there. If I could just get the cravings to lessen!

SO anyhoo... I hope that you all have a great end to the week, and that you have also come to the realization that alcohol does nothing GOOD for us - it only satisfies a false need in the primal part of our brains. I guess, all said and done, if the worst I have to deal with is cravings - but I get to avoid hangovers and get to enjoy ALL the benefits of not drinking, it's still a very positive decision I have made for myself.

[Matt M.]

Thank you Matt! I've tried to quit so many time. I just cant do it by myself. I'm in the state right now of being a little disappointed in myself that I can't drink normally. This has such a cruel mental twist to it. How long does it take for the train of thought to turn?

I tell this is a tough disease. Many of my attempts to quit were often accompanied with the thought of why me, why can't I drink " normal"
What is normal drinking? If I have to work double time to moderate my drinking, how is that beneficial. What are benefits of drinking. With a 20 year drinking career behind' I can think of none.
I guess it's a mindset change that had helped. Although I do have my cravings I no longer look at it as why can't I be normal ( not going to happen to me) or look at all the fun I'm missing out on? To me that last statement was the death of me many times.
What fun? The fun of waking up every fucking day with relentless guilt and remorse having to look at my three precious little boys and try and remember what I said to them the night before. The lies, hiding evidence..ALL OF THIS FOR A proven goddam poison. .
Can't give you a definitive day when the thoughts turn around but I can tell you each and everyday I don't give in to the beast is another great day.

[ShoshannaDreyfus]

Hi Kensho! Nice to meet you. I feel the same way. I KNOW alcohol is no good for me, I KNOW I can't drink. I just can't get the mental part of it under control. My brain is wired to turn to alcohol. I'm trying to limit the stress and find healthier ways to deal with that, my go to has always been alcohol. Tough day at work? I need a drink. Hard day with the kids? A drink will be nice. I can't figure out how to get by the mental hold this has on me. How long does it take for a new way of thinking to happen?

[narilly]

Sho, try and change your 'go to'. Maybe a walk, hot bath or a nice cup of tea to deal with stress. Its time to actually 'feel' what is going on in your life instead of numbing it away.
At the beginning when I was trying to quit, I changed my routine and did different things than I normally did. ie. went to a different restaurant that did not serve AL or went for a coffee instead of a beer. I was grateful for everyday I woke up with no hangover. My hangovers were SO bad and the guilt the day after brutal! I am so Thankful not to have that anymore.

Don't drink today Sho. you can do it. AL is poison. Think of where one glass leads...to 1 bottle and then to a blackout and a hangover. Your family seeing you drunk out of your mind, puking, falling down, crapping your pants, telling them they suck, whatever... Drinking AL is gross for those of us who can't stop at one.

Sober Friday here for me and grateful for that. I might go to Costco after work (another non drinking strategy). Ava, if I see my Aussie liquorice I will give it a squeeze and think of you.
It is supposed to warm up here and go ABOVE 0 this weekend! Good news for us.

Some great posts, Matt and Kensho. So nice to read them this morning.

[K9Lover]

Hi Nesties!

Just checking in to let you all know I am OK, sorry I've been AWOL for a while. I've had some major life changes and have been a bit down....but things are looking up! I will be around more often from now on.

Welcome to all the Newbies...you're in the right place.

xoxoxox

K9

[NoSugar]

There are several links in this thread (https://www.mywayout.org/community/sh...-Media-Toolbox) that explain what is going on in your brains. To me, knowledge is power. I hope something in here can make your situations easier to accept so you can quit fighting a battle that an addict cannot win. All the best, NS