Newbies Nest

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

S.H.I.T. So Happy It’s Thursday! Ha!
Kensho, if my Chihuahua is any indication of my parenting skills, its a good thing I didnt have children! Spoiled rotten. It’s hard to say NO! My heart goes out to you nesters with teens and tweens!
Slo, is tomorrow 7 days? We are warming up for your prize! We are so proud of you! Dont worry about the couple pounds, they will come off. Keep it going and you’ll never have to go thru this again!
Long day, drove 247 miles. Needless to say Im buried in work. Oy. Hope everyone has a peaceful evening. Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

It's so incredibly humid here, foggy, damp, yuck. I feel like I could be growing mushrooms or something, ha ha!!

Steady, I hope you feel better soon. Cover up that nose, Lol.

Slo, you are doing great, good for you!

Ava, it takes a while but at some point you truly will understand that you did the best thing for your pup, just like I did last summer :hug:
I'm relieved to hear the aunt s also no longer suffering, that's tough to watch.
Enjoy your nice warm house now 7 know that we are all thinking of you.

Pav & Kensho, summers were tough with the kids, I remember. Trying to fill up their days so they don't just sit & vegetate for 2 1/2 months wasn't easy.
Kensho, I am not ashamed to admit that I offered incentives (bribes) to my kids & they worked very well. The bribe depended on the age of the kid & what was majorly important to them at the time. Money & freedom in exchange for house chores, grass cutting, dog yard cleaning, taking trash out, etc. Both of my kids spent time working in their grandfather's drug store too. You'll figure it out. I never handed them allowances or free money - they had to earn it, always!

Brydie, I hope you come up for air soon

Everyone, have a safe & comfy night in the nest!

Lav

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Ola from Rio! Just back tonight from 4 days in the Amazon. Cool and interesting trip. There were a few parallels to Australia's rainforest and tropical zone in Queensland in the north, especially with the vegetation and jungle and a few critters. i.e. plenty of gators in Amazon, and we've got crocs here. The medicinal trees and plants we saw were a real treat. I think we are a similar latitude. Big waves to all. Take it easy. Off to chile tomorrow. Mmm, i wonder what the outcome will be with my female friend there. Should know a lot more tomorrow night. She's picking me up at the airport and then we're going to dinner. :eek-new:

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Byrdie, yes I have made it a week! Good point to remember that if I keep this going then I wonÂ’t ever have to go through this again. IÂ’m happy for you that itÂ’s almost the weekend.

I went to a lovely choir concert tonight at the high school. By that age they really sing well. ItÂ’s one of those end-of-year things that makes May a busy month for the teachers, but I really appreciated it.

Keesho,, IÂ’m going through the same thing with my daughter that you are with your son, and dreading summer a bit because of it. That and controlling screen time. It helps to know IÂ’m not alone.

Saturday is the first big hurdle as IÂ’m going to a drinking parry; my nephewÂ’s high school graduation party. Triggers galore. I will miss not having beers there. ItÂ’s kind of weird that high school graduations are drinking parties when the guests of honor canÂ’t even drink legally, but they are.

Good luck tomorrow, Guitarista!

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Quick check-in tonight. Hugs to all the parents and fur-kid parents in the nest. None of this is easy, and it's also part of what makes life rich. Here's hoping everyone has happy and healthy weekends. Can't wait to see pics G-ster. Have a great weekend with your lady friend.

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Ola! and top of the friday morning from the amazing but 'contradictorially' troubled and beautiful city that is Rio de janeiro.

Thanks Slo and Wags. I'm primed to go with the flow. Cool, relaxed and a proud fairly upstanding alcohol free kick ass heavy metal zen warrior. :thumbsup:

Slo, all the best with your weekend. One of the many fab things about this joint and thread, is that so many others are going through, have been through and can relate to all of the things you mentioned above. So you're not alone here. I know there are no limits to our potential or to where we want to be.

Wags, i've been slack with the pics. I'll upload some soon. Right now i gotta blow this popsicle stand in Rio and git organised.

Jumpin jalapeno's, i've just passed the 9 month mark. Right on. In other news, i have an interview with my boss for a job i've been filling in doing when i'm back home. She's asked me to apply. This would not, i say wouldn't have happened if i hadn't ditched the booze. My demeanor and vibe would've been dulled in the workplace, along with some puffiness, redness and a little irritation/grumpiness. This stuff shows to all around us. Being AF you are you, and barriers, prison walls, are demolished as your real, beautiful self shines.

Take it easy out there. Wishing all a safe sober and magical weekend.

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, All:

LC - are you around? What's going on?

G - WHOOT! 9 months was a key milestone for me. I felt a lot better - that "why me?" feeling started going away for good. Congratulations on your offer of promotion, and above all, good luck in steamy Santiago. Hope you samba the night away...(and don't purchase any side trips to Boozeville).

Lav! Cold and humid here. May your mushrooms grow tasty and your hair less frizzy...

Kensho - have fun. As I've said here before, I love seeing live music sober, and I really NEVER thought that would be possible.

A friend on FB just passed her 33rd year sober. Here's what she wrote:
33 years clean and sober today. Also 33 years of feeling. 33 years of remembering. 33 years of struggling to relax. 33 years of being present even when I want to hide. But also 33 years of working hard to be a better person, sister, friend. I wouldn’t change a minute!

I really appreciated the "being present even when I want to hide..." I also appreciated how content she is after 33 years without the booze. Only 27 more to go for me!

Well, happy Friday. The cool thing about a three-day weekend is the four day work week that follows.

Take care of yourselves and don't drink.

Pav

[NolaLola]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello all! New to this forum and hoping to learn how to moderate my drinking before things become out of hand.

- NolaLola

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hello all! New to this forum and hoping to learn how to moderate my drinking before things become out of hand.

- NolaLola

Welcome, NolaLola

You're lucky to be realizing you need to quit before your life has gone completely off the rails. Unfortunately, the moderation section of this forum isn't very active anymore. However, a good first step for someone who plans to drink moderately in the future is to abstain for 30 days and see how you feel at that point. People who really can drink moderately won't find the 30 days to be a huge problem. After that amount of time alcohol-free, you'll be in a better position to clearly assess your situation.

The toolbox is full of ideas to make not drinking easier and you're welcome to ask any questions here. Many of us have been through 30 days or more and might be able to help.

Take care and all the best to you, NS

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

G, happy 9 months Fella! I’m at 6, right behind you! Congrats on your job application too!

Pav, thanks for sharing your friend’s 33yr. post! Key phrase… “Wouldn’t change a thing”. How many people who drink excessively and in addiction can say that after ANY time, let alone 33 years?

Hi Nola Lola! Welcome!

I’m gathering things to go visit our friends and attend a large concert. I’m SO excited! No kids, and I’ve finally established myself as a non-drinker. Last year at this time, I was saying “I can have just one or two.” And I did. And then I had 1-2 per night. Again. It’s so freeing to not have that question hanging over my head; it’s not even in consideration. It’s not happening. Frees up my head space to just have fun and enjoy the music! Sometimes the bands we see aren’t my favorite, but I love the ones we will see tonight. Positive and fun. And I’m not so tired that I can’t live it up and have a little fun! (the NA way, of course).

Thank you all SO much for continuing to support me and the growth that takes place during this process. You are all so wise and I can’t believe how much people can intuit what others need to hear on a written-only forum. It’s amazing, and I credit you and this place for me being in a place to really WANT to go to this concert completely alcohol-free!! It used to also bother me that some of those we were with would make comments like “what, no drink for you?” It’s funny because it doesn’t even phase me any more. I used to be SO afraid of that situation - not only because I had to answer to it and the temptation, but because it caused question in my mind. It is easier than ever now to just say - “are you kidding? No thanks… you know that about me.” And move on.

Ava, it’s 90 degrees here, so I can’t imagine needing heat - but I’m sure glad you have yours!

Have a great night everyone!

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

Slo great work on 7 days and keep up the great work.

Welcome Nola, you will find a wealth of information on al here and around the boards. How much are you drinking if you dont mind me asking?

Pav, i love what your fb friend said and only an ex drinker can have those special thoughts and feelings regarding booze. It touched home that we have had all 4 1/2 years of those feelings and they have been the best times. Lots of ups and downs but no more getting wasted, no more blackouts, no more GSR's and i remember most things in middle age.

G congrats on 9 months and your promotion also. Like you, i would never ever have gotten a promotion if i had been drinking and resentful and bitter and emotional and god everything else that goes with it. You will do wonderfully well at your new job and you so deserve it.

Kensho enjoy your concert booze free, take your tools and you wont have any problems but always go prepared.

Today i am going shopping with my boys, they need tools for work, i will need coffee. they are not as much fun to go out with as my girls but i may get an op shop or two in and they can wait in the car.

take care xx

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

I did make it 7 days, but not 8. I hate being sober. But thanks for your help in making it through a week.

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Wow, lots of milestoners in the nest today!
Slo, as promised, here is your PRIZE! :butt: Yes, its that 2-Cheeked salute that only WE can deliver! Its your FULL MOON. No butts about it, those first 7 are the hardest, and now they are BEHIND you! We are so proud of you! Keep up the great work!

Mr G, 9 months! This is a whole new baby! Your outlook on life is so refreshing. Hope you and your chiquita git it! Congrats on a job well done!
:upsidedown:
Kensho, wowzers, 6 months?! Im so happy for you! :rara: im with you, I dont ever want o go back to the pit of addiction. Been there, done that. Enjoy your weekend!
Welcome Nola, we are so glad you found us!
Hope everyone has an easy night. Byrdie

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

CONGRATS on your 9 AF months fella, great work :welldone:
Enjoy the rest of your trip & behave yourself, ha ha!

Slo, do you want to tell us what happened? If you drank today you can stop & get right back on your plan. Stay with us, please.

Kensho, you hit 6 months AF, love it, good for you! Life IS better without AL

Hello & welcome Nola, glad you found us. When I first joined I also wanted to learn to control my drinking. As I approached my 30 days alcohol free I asked myself if I was really ready for just one drink, the answer was a definite NO. So I just stayed AF & here I am 9 years+ later. I have never regretted that decision.

Ava, Byrdie, NS, Pav & everyone -
Have a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters!

Wowza, as G-man would say.. reading back 10 days, more or less in one go (actually over 2 days), was an experience. I love this nest.. After the girls got back from their vacation, I had full on kids and work and then an out of town work trip.. it was a hard-core, but amazing experience. I came out of the closet to my closest colleague last November, so I knew drinking wouldn't be an option for me even if I wanted to drink.. and not only did I not want to, no one really drank anyway.. a little bit, but they're the kind of people who into their 2nd glass of wine say, "Oh, this is starting to go to my head", and then stop, leaving the glass half full!? Back in the day, that was exactly the point I was aiming for and happy with and then I'd carry on trying to sip/gulping until I was sick or passed out.
Anyway, that's why I haven't checked in for awhile. You were in my thoughts, as usual.. my protective shield.

Ava, I am so sorry to hear of the loss of Rupey..what a difficult decision you had to make. A big hug from me, days late I know, so for that, even bigger.. I hope you and your family are beginning to feel better. How's the other little furry friend (name has escaped me atm) doing after a couple of days? And how's your SO doing after the loss of his Aunt? You sure have had a lot to deal with..:hug:

Welcome to NolaLola!! Great advice from NS to take 30 days AF.. That will give you a chance to really examine your relationship with alcohol, to see the difference in how you feel without it in your system.. there's a wealth of information and support here in the Nest. Looking forward to getting to know you better!

Slo, you did a great job with 7 days! It was difficult but you did it, coming here each day to talk it out, realizing that you can do it! Go back a couple of days to page 7436 and re-read what TJAF wrote.. you can do this and you will make it..you've got to jump right back into your AF life, to look at what happened, why you decided to drink, and make some changes in your plan of action.. or make a plan of action if you didn't have one before.. as others have said, finding the mindset of gratitude is key.. you said that you hate being sober, but it didn't sound like you were happy with your choice to drink again. You sounded proud of yourself as you chose to set a good example for your daughter.. and you felt good after overcoming the initial urges to drink. Have you made a physical list of the reasons you want to be sober? That helped me so much and it's something I go back to a lot.. This is ultimately a choice we make for ourselves because we want to have a better life.. we're literally sick and tired of the lies we've been living.. You know we are all here to support you in any way we can, so please let us know how we can..don't give up!!:love:

Rose, I hope you're still around, too.. let us know how you're doing..

Wags, I agree, that was a beautiful and inspiring post.. I'm glad it's going into the Toolbox so that I'll be able to easily find it again!

Speaking of, Byrdie, where is that post about making Plan? I know it's in the Toolbox as well, but I don't know where.. Maybe it's possible to repost it again.. at the end of the TB so it's easier to find..? I know that when I first started here, I didn't really understand the concept of a plan.. and that helped so much. I'm also so glad you chose your Hubbie over alcohol! It's so sadly true that many people don't..

Kensho, you are sounding amazingly strong in your quit! And in finding ways to balance your life. I am very happy for you.. enjoy the concert and time out with your friends.. here's to friends who support us in our decisions!

G-man, I'm on the edge of my seat.. waiting to hear how the next couple of days go with your lovely lady.. Great advice from the Ladies in the Nest here (when you want advice from women, this is most deifinitely the place to come!) and I know you will have a great time while taking care of yourself. I'm so glad you've been able to post and share so much of your adventure!

Lav, you lucky chick, with the shiny new red car! I hear you with regards to the weather.. we've had such hot days and last night had an amazing thunder/rain storm.. but now it's muggy, albeit with a bit of a cool breeze.. I have to keep reminding myself that I love Summer!

NS, I'm glad you're feeling better after a month of allergy/cold hell.. Glad you're getting your energy back!

Big hello to Pav, Nar, Pauly.. who am I missing? Everyone flying by or stopping in, wishing you a nice weekend.. Let's make it one where we take care of ourselves, enjoy the extra time we've freed up from not having to worry about hangovers and the GSR brothers! Let's do something nice for ourselves and for our loved ones.. xx