Newbies Nest

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

I agree that it is hard to stop worrying, @Pavati. For me, it helps simply to notice what is going on and to be aware that I'm creating the negative feelings I'm experiencing by what I'm thinking. It somehow let's me take myself less seriously and not really worry about how I'm feeling because I know it will pass when my thinking changes (which it always does).

When it feels like I'm being attacked from someone or something outside of me, it helps to remember that that isn't really the case. Sometimes I stop and ask myself if another person would be feeling differently than I am in a particular situation, and the answer is always 'yes' - proof that my experience is coming from my thoughts about whatever is going on. For example, @lifechange might have a friend who would be so thrilled that her son actually took and passed his first exam, it may not matter to her at all that he wasn't interested in the second one. I'm always amazed at how different my and my husband's accounts are of things we did together. Usually I just think he's nuts and has a terrible memory but really, his experience was actually different. Sometimes because we noticed and paid attention to different aspects of the event and sometimes because our thoughts about it just weren't the same.

It's like the old story of having 5 blindfolded men who've never seen one each touch a different part of an elephant, and describe what an elephant is. The guy at the trunk tells a much different story than those touching the foot, ear, side, or tail of the animal.

I'm not saying I don't worry -- but I don't worry about worrying. xx

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Friday evening greetings Nesters,

I feel a certain dampness coming on, supposed to start raining tomorrow night & all day Sunday. Guess I’ll hang out in my kitchen & be creative

Wags, there’s always temp agencies where you can find willing help. My daughter worked for an agency for several years & had a number of interesting jobs. I’m just happy you are doing so well!

LC, hope your day was good & your Mom’s knee is OK.

Byrdie, are the installers regular employees of. Your company? You would think they would be interested in making the product work correctly, geez.

Pav, I really had to adopt Tolle’s ‘The Power of Now’!!! That book helped me thru a very hard time when my husband decided to suddenly go live elsewhere & wouldn’t give me an explanation. That happened about 15 months into my quit & I sure wasn’t going to drink over his bizarre behavior. It was all about him anyway & out of my control.

NS, my granny was a huge worrier, thought it was kinda funny until I started my own worrying . At this point I make sure to keep myself in the present, saves a ton of energy!

Hello to the whole crew & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Unhung Saturday Morning, Nesters!

I'm up at the crack of dawn, baking cookies for an event my daughter has today.. Lav, I'll be interested to hear what sort of creations you concoct today in the kitchen!
We have a quiet day planned, with a walk to the outdoor market and maybe some lunch..
I've been still feeling a bit uneasy, but am conscioiusly dealing with it.
I'm very grateful to be at 30 days AF!!! It hasn't been difficult in the sense of "getting through" the days, as I've sometimes had in the past... with the exception of the first few days, which sucked. I haven't had any huge cravings.. it's been more about finding/making new habits to deal with life.. the ups and downs. And for me, the stress, wanting to escape.. I'm finding new ways to escape if I need to, and more important, figuring out how to plan things so that I don't get to the point of wanting to escape.. planning the times of rest/relaxation into my daily life instead of running myself to the ground. I can run around like a chicken sometimes.. but not too often. Avoiding people who bring stress into my life when possible and trying to think ahead about how to handle those with whom I must have contact.. same goes for situations, whether to avoid or if I must, How can I prepare myself? Hey, that sounds a lot like having a plan!!:happy2:
Having a mind that isn't consumed with self doubt, the gsr brothers, active addiction.. I have space to focus on quiet time, exercise, nutrition, listening to my kids and friends, making good decisions, doing well at my job..
I have work to do! Letting go of what has already been done.. The past couple of days, I've had a lot of guilt about all the times I wasn't there for the girls these past almost 3 years. I wasn't capable of doing my job as a mom.. I won't even go there right now.. I have to block it out because it makes me so sad. The past 30 days I've been there.. though it's just been the past week that I've been able to really listen and not be irritated. NOW I am here and being the mom I WANT to be.. and they definitely feel it and react to it.

Well, I wish all of you a really nice day.. Byrdie (cracked me up about the teens!!), NS, Pav, Wags, Nar, Pauly, Kensho, Gman, Ava, all of you flying by or checking in.. Let's make it good one! Let's continue on this path of sobriety! Drinking alcohol is gross!!!!

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters,ah the worrying! Last year I felt like I was worried about everything,my biggest one was that the house was gonna catch on fire in the middle of the night,I had insomnia anyways so would get up and check the burners,make sure things were unplugged,etc I finally came to the realization that some things can't be unplugged anyways like the fridge,tv,sons computer set up,so I just learned to relax a bit about it,of course that's scary and could actually happen but my worry was just getting in the way of my life and thoughts so I stopped haha,was watching 90 day fiance and this guys girlfriend was worried about everything and he told her"you worry about too much stuff it's silly" so I've adopted that mantra LC, congratulations on 30 days! Wags I'm happy your business is doing good Byrdie, maybe it was just a bad unit right outta the box? Hopefully it gets sorted easily,waves to the gang and have a happy day!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

LC, on behalf of the whole Newbie’s Nest, please accept this hearty congratulations! Here’s your hat! :guy: We are so proud of you! Keep up the great work!
Well, it turns out that the tech installed a cheaper device and it wasn’t covering the area. He replaced it with the one I had on the order. I’m not sure what we, as a company, will do about that. This was not an employee of ours but a contractor. In my next life, I will NOT be in sales.
Hope everyone has an easy Sattidy! Byrdie

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good Morning--

CONGRATULATIONS, LC! Keep it going - you're doing great. That old regret - sort of the opposite of anxiety in that you're worried about things that already happened so you can't change them anyway. I don't know your daughters but from your description it sounds like they're doing just fine. Focus on your now with them - you'll all be much happier.

Byrdie - WHAT?? Can the place that got robbed sue you and then you sue the contractor? Seems like that's a pretty grand foul up.

Aah, Lav. The rain. Sounds lovely. We're in the middle of hot, dry autumn with a big fire going, electricity shut offs, etc. It is very sad to see entire towns just burned away - the destruction is massive. I long for that first rain out here...

Happy SOBER Saturday.

Pav

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola friends!

Congrat's on 30 days LC! Wowza! Keep it going mi amiga.

Drats Byrdy. If it's not one thing it's another! You are amazing keeping an even keel in stormy seas. Hope you're getting some relaxation in this weekend.

NS and Pav. Yes, worry! What a PITA. I like your words NS. I can still worry, but i reckon i remove some of the intensity and its power by being aware that i'm worrying, and upon examination of my thoughts on the matter/s, soon understand that i usually cannot control the outcome, much less predict what will happen in the future like a fortune teller! This seems to help my worrying dissipate signef....i say significantly.

Have a great weekend evabody.

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Pav, I personally can’t be sued. Our contracts also speak to the limitation of liabilities. It’s still a bad situation. Not sure where it will go.

I made the mint chocolate chip cake. Grab a plate and I’ll cut you a slice! B36178CA-BC14-43BD-AAEA-FC89123FF44D.jpg

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Wow Byrdie, nice cake!!!!!!
Sounds like that contractor will not be getting any more jobs with your company, geez.

LC, CONGRATS to you on your 30 AF days :welldone: Keep doing that, no more looking back!
Dinner was a simple thing tonight. I put a cut up locally grown chicken in the middle of a baking dish, added almost a pound of green beans on one side & a bunch of halved small potatoes on the other. Topped it with a little olive oil & a ton of herbs de Provence, baked it for 50 minutes - EASY, haha! Of course there’s tons of leftovers to play with since it was only us eating.

Pav, we had a few drops of rain then it stopped. The big part of the storm will be moving in tonight. I hope you get some rain soon, those fires are scary.

Hi there G, Pauly & everyone.

Not much else going on here so I’ll just wish everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[narilly]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi everyone, just checking in. I am going to. Halloween party tonight and am just getting ready. I don’t drink and for that I am grateful.

I used to love getting drunk at Halloween because I could wear a costume and kinda hide how much I was drinking, ugh.
So glad those days are over.

Have a great night and don’t drink today.

[lifechange]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good morning, Nesters,

Pav, I'm so sorry to hear that it's still so dry and hot in your part of the world. It seems to be the way it is there every year now, right? I hopw you'll get some rain relief soon.
We're heading for cold weather next week.. under 50°F for a high, which is our old normal. It's no wonder we all talk about the weather so much with all the crazy changes we've seen these past 10 years..
Nar, I hope you had a nice party.. Halloween is one of my least favourite holidays.. except for the candy! What/who did you dress up as?
Lav, that dinner sounds delicious! I've never done that, adding fresh green veggies from the get go.. will try!
Byrdie, that cake is gorgeous! How did you get the frosting to look just like mint chip ice cream? I'll tell you, that's one thing I really miss here.. mint chip and peanut butter and chocolate ice cream. I guess it's a blessing in disguise!

I went and read through the 3P's thread again and picked up some good reading material/podcasts..
We're heading to an exhibit today of Van Gogh's still life paintings, which I'm really looking forward to.. Even though I don't really paint, it inspires me to see the works of others.

My mom is leaving Tuesday, so we're just enjoying our last days together. I am also looking forward to getting back to "normal" life and routine.. I'm still working on what that routine will look like. Taking it day to day, but with a plan.
Big hugs to you all!! Let's make it a good one..:love:

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

LC - congrats on 30 days!!!!! Now 31 I guess You're doing fantastic, even if those haven't been easy days. They often aren't at the beginning, or at other later times, but they generally do get easier and you've got loads of tools plus a whole nest to help you keep on truckin' forward.

Pav - I've been thinking about you and all of my other CA friends and family. I'm originally from CA as well and it's where half of my heart is still. These big fires are scary, sad, and in some ways could be/could have been prevented or at least the risk reduced. I hope everyone stays safe and that the fires are contained quickly.

Byrdie - oh byrdie, I wish I really did have an "empire" that I could whisk you away and hire you for. That sales job sounds difficult on the best of days, so I can only imagine what the bad days are like. I'm glad you aren't personally in line for liability on this recent situation, but it does sound very bad for the company and for the contractor. Sigh... Hang in there friend. On a totally different note, that's a beautiful cake!!! I can almost taste it through the screen

Nar - hope the party was fun. Did you dress up?


Ok, I'm off now into a marathon day of tutoring. There's a big test day tomorrow and then another 4 weeks from tomorrow, and I've got several students prepping for each day. Most of the tomorrow ones are ready to go aside from some last-minute nerve calming we'll be doing today, but things just got real for the Nov test takers as they realized they're inside the one-month-to-go mark. Somehow that starts a different clock ticking for most folks.

Have wonderful Sunday days and eves everyone. Sending hellos, waves, high fives and hugs to all (pick which ones you want!).

[paulywogg]

Re: Newbies Nest

Morning nesters,not much going on here just wanted to say hi and hope everyone has a Fab day!-dont drink it's gross! Byrdie the cake is awesome!

[Pavati]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi, all:

No power - a little juice left in my computer, though, so I thought I'd check in. Massive evacuations, and a very high wind. It is a scary situation - I feel so sorry for those people who were just evacuated and/or lost homes recently. While we can blame climate change for the hot, dry conditions, we can also blame our private electric utility. They have not been doing proper maintenance or upgrades and it is paying off. We are safe and not evacuating and for that I am grateful, but I'm angry at the situation, too.

Byrdie - that cake is amazing! So beautiful.
LC - Chocolate peanut butter ice cream is my favorite! Sorry you have to do without.

Happy SOBER Sunday - I think I'll sign off now and save my battery.

Pav

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

I appreciate the kind words about my cake!
LC, I took vanilla buttercream frosting and added mint extract and Andes mint chips and a little bit of green food coloring to get the ‘look’.
Pav, my heart goes out to everyone over your way, it’s just tragic! Stay safe, friend!
Enjoying my Sunday, I have a hot date with some weeds later on. Life is good!
Byrdie