Newbies Nest

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Slo - Congratulations on your 3 years!!! Woohoo on such a big accomplishment! On my end, yes - I met my wife in between my two long AF times. I basically didn't drink from around 1998 or 1999 to early 2011, so really more like 12 years although I'm not certain on the start date so I always call it 10+. Then I drank until tax day in 2014 (mid-April), quit for several months (first time in the Nest here), but that quit fell apart in late 2014. I met my wife in Jan 2015 and I started my Last and Final Quit on July 24, 2016. Tomorrow makes this 5 years and I'm never going back to booze again.

Ava - so glad to hear that your surgery went well and that the GA was much smoother this time. It must be exciting to know the worst part is over with and now you just have pearly whites to look forward to!

Oh NS, your pup does sound pretty typical but also exasperating with such strange dietary choices! I'm glad the washcloth episode turned out ok and I hope for both your sanity and her health that your doggo learns not to eat such things.


Happy weekends to everyone, and as NS already said, NO tix to boozeville for anyone!

[Byrdlady]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hey, Nesters!
I'm loving my new eye! Getting the left eye done next Wednesday. That should give me my near vision. I hope it goes as well as the first one. Lav, sandbags and laying flat sounds awful! Glad things have advanced.
My hubs and I also sleep in separate bedrooms. He is a restless sleeper and snorer. I hated for him to go, but there comes a time when sleep is more important.
Slo, congrats on those 3 big years! So proud of you! :three: keep up the great work!
My new brother is coming to visit tomorrow. Looking forward to that. I’ve been cleaning today, since I can see (well, mostly). Yikes, things can get dingy when you aren’t paying attention. Spent a good amount of time with a rag in hand and a bottle of 409.
Wags, 5 years tomorrow. Big doings for you, too! :spin: so happy for this incredible achievement! Woot!
Happy Friday, all. It’s only Friday, not a ticket to BoozeVille! Hugs to all, Byrdie

[STEADFAST]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thankyou so much, everyone, for your nice words of support. My Mum passed away on July 20th. It was 11 horrible days of driving out to the hospital to see her slowly dying. (Mr (Un)Steady is simply not capable of being supportive, or even driving!!!) And of course with Covid restrictions it was appropriate for me to go alone anyway. Mum is out of pain now, her heart had been breaking for six long years without Dad. Our family (i.e. my siblings) have imploded a bit in recent days. I guess that's pretty normal for the typical dysfunctional family! Am keeping a low, peaceful profile. I am so very thankful to be sober and strong and clear-headed at this time.

There are many posts on here that resonate with me, particularly those about partner issues, and being ''a woman of a certain age''. Many of us in this Nest seem to have common themes in our lives, and it's comforting to read how others cope and give each other advice.

I'll be back here after I've got through the next week, including Mum's funeral service.

Peace & strength to all, Steady
:heartbeat:

[NoSugar]

Re: Newbies Nest

Your mom is at peace, Steady, and I hope that you find some, too :hug:.

Congratulations on 5 years, Wags! I admire you for accomplishing this a third time -- I honestly I am not sure I have it in me to do it again so like you're doing this time, I'm trying to stay connected with all of you. The times I am away for awhile due to life being lifey, my painful past easily fades from my memory. I realize that that is beneficial evolutionarily or no one would birth more than 1 child but for something like addiction, a clearer memory would be helpful! Anyway, I hope you enjoy your celebratory meal today.

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Two BIG sober parties within a few days! This is huge! I'm around strong, capable people who value themselves more than booze. We build on each other's strength.

Steady, what a tough time you are going through. Hopefully you are feeling the tiniest bit of relief. I'm sorry for your loss. Under the radar sounds good.

I slept in this morning until 8:15 - what a treat. Quiet weekend for us, mostly at home. Going to one of our coffee shops this morning for breakfast - a family ritual we have been doing every Saturday morning for over 15 years. It's our focused family time, and a quiet morning without cooking. Meals are not always together anymore with my son working - so we do what we can. He actually blocked Saturday mornings off so we can have our "coffee hour". Even though I don't drink coffee. I really miss it and sip the smell any time I can.

Anyway - hope everyone has a relaxing weekend day.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Good evening Nesters,

Warm & super sunny here today. Tomorrow we return to gross heatwave temps, ugh. I hate to wish time away but I am ready for the cool, crisp fall air.

Wags, a big CONGRATS to your on your 5 years AF :welldone:
We know this is your Last and Final Quit & we are all very proud of you!!

Byrdie, I hope your visit is fun & relaxing with your brother. Good luck on your upcoming procedure & I am grateful things have advanced too

Steady, very sorry for your loss, we are here for you if you need us :hug:

NS, I think the secret is to enjoy life as it is now with the knowledge that we would have to be idiots to invite AL back into our lives. I think we are smarter that that!!

Kensho, that’s great that you can gather everyone on a Saturday morning. When our kids were growing up we both worked shift work so getting the whole crowd together was a huge task. We had tgo look for openings haha!

Hello to all & wishing everyone a safe night in the nest!

Lav

[Slo]

Re: Newbies Nest

Congratulations, Wags, on making it to that important 5-year milestone! What a great place to be.

Steady, Sorry that Mr. Unsteady was unable to provide much support to you during your mother’s death. And imploding siblings too…but yes, typical dysfunctional family behavior during a stressful time. Wishing you strength to get through the funeral, and strength for funeral planning with the sibs.

Kensho, what a lovely tradition you have, going out for “coffee” as a family every Saturday! Nice that you got a chance to sleep in, too. Hope you’re feeling a little more caught up with work as you make up for vacation time.

Byrdie, I love it that you have the new brother in your life!
And you know that cataract surgery was a success when you can now see grime that was previously invisible! I do hope that you get a perfect outcome after the other eye is done next week.

I talked to HB about his sleeping upstairs. He likes his “space”; that when he wakes up in the middle of the night he can just turn on his podcast loudly and listen to it. He used to just turn on the TV loudly in the middle of the night when we shared a room. I had to have it out with him about that, since it would wake me up!
Well, whatever -I’m enjoying being able to stretch & move freely too, without worrying about waking someone else up. And in the morning I can just get up when I wake up, instead of trying to lie still so he can hopefully sleep longer. (If I get up then the dog gets up, and that would wake him up.) So, so be it I guess. And I’ll look for the positives.

Back to the Olympics!

[Guitarista]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hola friends!

Hi Steady. Sorry for the loss of your mum. Condolences to you and family. take care of yourself. Hope you me and Ava can catch up again down the track. It's always a real delight.

Wagstar! 5 years af. Slostar! 3 years af. Congratulations ladies! I echo friend Kensho's comment that we are indeed surrounded by strong and champion Olympic, gold medal grade people 'round this joint.

I must tune into the olympics. I hear surfing has entered as a sport for the first time. Some discussion that the waves are a little ordinary on the chosen beach. I'm tipping the competitor with a daily attitude gratitude will win. A test of skills either way.

Big waves to evabody.

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

Afternoon nesters

Steady, i am so very sorry to hear of your mums passing. Stay strong girl, you are an incredible person with a lot of strength in you. We will have to catch up when things settle down.

Slo, happy 3rd sober birthday. Funny how we can forget so many things but the day we became sober is forever etched in our minds. Its so lovely you are present and sober for your grandbabies.

Wags and happy 5th sober birthday to you too. Its amazing to me that you got back in and stopped drinking again, i dont think i could ever do that if i started. id have to make up for lost time lol. I hope you enjoyed your meal out and time with the fam.

Feeling rather ordinary after having 3 implants and 2 crowns put in on Friday. i have spent the weekend in bed and that is so not like me. i keep thinking of all the things i should be doing and then go nope, just lay in bed. Ice packs are helping which is good and carl has been the best nurse and carer in the world, has not left my side. i owe him a few big walks. 3 months till my missing teeth will be put in, sigh, a long process but i will be smiling by xmas and i am going to get my teeth whitened as a present to myself. Next the boob job and tummy tuck and .......................... (i think not).

How old is your son now Kensho, i keep thinking of him as a young 10 year old. funny how time flies.

take care xx

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

WAGMORE has 5 GOLDEN YEARS!!! No looking back now!! Sail on into your sober future, knowing that you are not wasting your life away!! Happy for you!

Slo, enjoy the uninterrupted sleep! Sounds like your husband has some life issues of his own. Don't let him make you feel that you are causing all issues - I've found that those who blame or make others feel bad often have the same issues they are accusing others of. To echo LAV: Just focus on taking care of you. You're doing great - onward to 4 years!!!

Ava, good for you enjoying your bed! I love the image of your Carl being your bedside warrior. What a cutie. When I joined MWO in 2014, my son was was 7! Now 15, complete with eye rolling, learning to drive and spending time by himself in his room. How time flies - thank God I didn't waste more time drinking with these kiddos.

Byrdie, are you opening a chocolate shop on the beach soon?

[BelleGirl]

Re: Newbies Nest

Hi Nesters,
First of all, congrats to Slo and Wags on their milestones! What great role models we have to look up to here.

Steady, sorry about losing your Mom. It was horrible when I lost my mom in 2014. So many times I wish I could ring her up and tell her things about the kids. Dad passed in 2016, and I know his heart was breaking missing Mom. We always thought he would go first due to his many, many years of smoking. His last two years without her were awful for him I am sure.

Speaking of my parents...I decided to give myself a weekend retreat at their home, which my brothers and I have decided to keep rather than sell. It is in a lovely area with lakefront access in the backyard, and a short walk to the Patuxent river (it's in Maryland). Also a 20 minute ride to beaches on the Chesapeake, where I plan to go in a little while. My brother and his "wife" and baby have been living here but they took off to England for 3 months. He left plants that needed watering...my excuse (not really). I just needed to get away and have some time to myself. Daughter usually comes with me but honestly I was not to upset when she decided to stay home. I packed and got out before she changed her mind. lol.

I did go out to dinner last night with some childhood/highschool friends that live in the area who I haven't seen in a few years. I normally don't drink when I go out (I did all my damage at home alone). When the waitress came around to take drink orders, one of them said "so, are you still not drinking" like it was a sin or something. I ordered my usual gin & tonic minus the gin with a twist of lime (because if I don't say it that way, they give me club soda which I hate). After that initial comment, it was not an issue. I do have the excuse (and a very valid one) that I am on medications for my fibromyalgia and drinking is not advised. We had a great time, laughed and closed the place, surprised they did not kick us out. Interestingly, the one that mentioned my 'not drinking' is the one who always gets the drunkest. Fortunately she rode with a designated driver who only had one drink. Methinks she has a problem.

Sorry for the long one. I have slept really well here, took a long walk yesterday and then took a long nap. I really needed this reset time. Fortunately hubs did not see an issue with it. He did go to Nantucket over July 4 holiday alone, so there.

Have a wonderful Sunday, nesters. I know I will have to put a plan together for when I hit home later today. Everything will hit me at once and that has historically been a trigger. I need to be armed for it.

[Lavande]

Re: Newbies Nest

Sunday evening greetings Nesters,

Just had a good thunderstorm here, let’s see if that clears the air a bit.
Not much going on with me this weekend which is just fine. I cut back my huge crop of daisies outside, the blooms were nice while they lasted.

Ava, drink lots of water & tea. It helps clear any lingering effects of anesthesia. Glad Carl is on duty & attentive to your needs

Belle, a weekend on your own sounds lovely, enjoy

Slo, I realized years ago that just because some things change & are different doesn’t mean that they’re bad, just different. Took me a while to catch on but honestly it was the only way we could continue under the same roof. I strengthened my boundaries to make sure nothing/no one could throw me off track again. That’s how we have to take care of ourselves :hug:

G, can we expect to see you surfing in the Olympics at some point? Haha, that would be cool!

Hello to Kensho & everyone checking in tonight.
Have a safe night in the nest everyone!

Lav

[wagmor]

Re: Newbies Nest

Thanks to all on the congrats! 5 years felt like a dream goal at the beginning, and now, after a whole lotta "one-day-at-a-time's" here we are. I feel really solid about my quit this time around. I did it with much more intention and focus, and I also got through some terribly challenging life events without al during the past 5 years. If none of those things were a reason for me to drink, then there truly is NO reason.

Steady - I'm sorry to hear about your mom. Sending you love and support :hug:

Belle - sounds like a lovely escape. Great that you've figured out how to order your drink so it arrives the way your want it!

Ava - a weekend recouping in bed seems well-deserved. Glad you have Carl as your comforter-in-chief.

G - I'm so excited to see some of the new Olympics sports. It's a little odd to see sports that started at least somewhat as counter-culture movements in the mainstream now, but I'll definitely be checking each of them out to see what has been pulled together.


Hellos and waves everyone. Happy last week of July to you all!

[KENSHO]

Re: Newbies Nest

Last week in July... Wow, that came fast! I spent the yesterday trying to set up my new computer, doing laundry, planning the week's meals and getting groceries, and driving my kids to friends' and work, and trying to finalize a paint color for the exterior of our house. Honestly, paint is not my strength. In fact, I struggle with it. Trying to find other houses that have a good color and asking them what it is! Headed to the paint store first thing this morning to get another sample. Out the door at 7am, which is a Yikes for me.

Belle, I order a soda and lime at restaurants too. What is different the way you order it? Does it come in a smaller glass, or is the soda different? Awesome that you had a fun night closing the place, sans booze for you.

Wags, which are your favorite Olympic events to watch? We had skateboarding on last night where a 13 year old girl won gold....

Lav, good to know that your daisies are about done too. I thought I killed mine, but it might just be the end of their bloom season. For such a concise writer, I have such vivid images of your (not dirt) drive, lush property, gardens and chicken coop. How are the girls?

I have a whole day in the city today, running random errands. Tagging a counter slab, confirming a custom light glass color, pulling a trim for a bed canopy, picking up this, dropping off that - and finding wooden hangers, of all things. Not hard, but I'll be moving. It's that damn paint color and my computer that is not setting up properly that is stressing me out a bit. Trying to remember that it is a small detail, not a catastrophe.

Have a great day Nest!

[available]

Re: Newbies Nest

morning nesters

Kensho, i cannot believe your son is 15, i dont wish teenage years on anyone but i did find my boys grunted more and the girls kept telling me i knew nothing and i didnt love them. one of my babies turns 30 this October and my baby baby will be 28 in August.

Belle what a lovely time away for you. Funny how the drinkers like to try and make you feel bad for not drinking, if only they knew how great life was without chasing that next fix.

Lav, been drinking lots and eating a lot of mousse. last night i slept with an ice pack and that helped but damn my face was cold. off to GP today to get a few more days off, i really need to look after me.

Wags, i couldnt agree more that there is nothing that life could throw at me that could make me drink unless something happened to my children but i know even then they would be disappointed if i drank because of them.

i decided that since my dental work was not as much as they quoted that i am going to take the fam away for a weekend, a nice weekend away with them and their other bits. after the last couple of years i think we need some regrouping time together. they are all super excited and my daughter suggested we go away for her 30th bday weekend. suits me, its going to be a nightmare trying to organise 4 kids and other halves. we had a vote and my mother is not invited. Sad as it may seem, she is such an unhappy person that i would end up waiting on her and listening to the woes of the world. My nieces son is back in hospital with lung issues still so i will take mum to see her great grand son when he gets out of hospital in a couple of months. i figure an 11 hour drive with my mother will push the boundaries enough, ha ha.

going to open my work computer and do my email, then close my computer and rest.

take care xx