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[BecomingMeAtLast]

I'm new to this forum

Hi aprilmoon!

Love your name and avatar. I'm so glad you found us and thanks for your story. I can understand. You said 2 days AF? Congrats on that! No small feat for some of us here. :l

I look forward to getting to know you better,
Becoming

[aprilmoon]

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I let my husband read my story. He gave me a kiss and said "You can do this!" He is a wonderful husband.

[DeeBee]

I'm new to this forum

Hi Aprilmoon,

Your hubby sounds like the bomb -- good on him for supporting you through this.
Thanks for sharing your story with us.

[Evie.Lou]

I'm new to this forum

Welcome April, I am glad you found us. Now you will never be alone in beating Alcohol out of your life. you can do it, we're here to help.

[lilmea]

I'm new to this forum

Aprilmoon,

Talked with you on chat and welcome again. Ruby said it all-come here, read alot, post often.

Hope to see you again soon.

[rubywillow]

I'm new to this forum

Hi, again, A.M. I look forward to talking to you more, and maybe meeting somewhere up in N. Ga.! All our stories are different, but have the same villain! Glad you're here. I'm in and out a lot now, but PM me anytime!
Ruby

[upnorthgirl]

I'm new to this forum

April Moon

What a wonderfully honest person you are! It is this level of self-awareness and instinct and truthfulness that will help you succeed. So many of us have lied to others and ourselves for so long, that we can see the wonder of your honesty.

You are blessed with having a great husband who will stand by you--I am that lucky also. I related to your line that if hubby drank that much you would leave him--same here!

I APPLAUD you for coming here and baring your soul to us. It is not easy to trust, not easy to share without fear, and not easy to admit we need help. that you have done so--so early and completely--leads me to believe you will be successful in leading a happy AF life in the very near future.

Be sure to visit us in the Newbies Nest in Just Starting Out--great group!

[aprilmoon]

I'm new to this forum

This was my first thread that I made when I came to this website. I feel the need to update what has happened since I started this thread.

I am still AF. It's been 28 days since the last time I drank. I just made an appointment for my physical. Last year my liver enzimes (sp) were up, so I am hopeful that they will be down even after abusing my body from April 2008 to Jan 2009. My appointment is set for Feb 26th at 8:45. I'm going to discuss some of the meds here with my doctor. She is a great listener and will be totally honest with me.

During my AF time I have found that I am a morning person. I have been able to get up most of the mornings before my husband does. Well, I'll admit I do love my naps in the afternoon. I'm retired ..... I can nap when I want to. LOL

I have been able to make plans with friends and family and keep my plans. When I was drinking I could plan lots of things, but I usually didn't follow thru because I was too hungover to do anything with anyone.

I mentioned this to Lilmia and on a couple of my post today, but yesterday was a hard one for me. If ya'll remember any of my threads, I had one about should I or should I not throw out the half bottle of rum I still had. Most if not everyone said throw it out. I did pour it out down the drain. If I still had that rum in my house I am pretty sure I would have drank last night. Nothing happened tragic to make me want to drink. I just wanted to drink. Knowing that if I did drink it wouldn't be a few, it would have been to drink until way past drunk. Not having rum in my house and knowing that I was not going to get any made me "ill as a hornet" yesterday. My husband even asked me what was wrong. I told him I just didn't feel good. I did think hard on what my mood was all about and I came up with one thing. I just wanted my rum. I have not had a day being AF until yesterday.

Lilmia told me that she had issues about this time in her journey to be AF. By the way she is my bestest buddy on this site. She has 10 days more AF than me and is truly an inspiration to me. She and I have alot in common.

Lilmia suggested that I keep a daily log of how I'm doing so I found this old thread and decided to put it here. Folks, you don't have to read it and you don't have to post in it unless you want to. It's just so that I can journal how I'm feeling. So here I go.

Day 28 AF
I woke up glad that I didn't go get rum yesterday. I got up before my husband and the first thing I did was get on this website. I read some of the new threads and then went to the one that list stupid things we do when drinking. I laughed and laughed and remember my first day here reading the same thread and thinking those people know me.....LOL I'm not going to drink today because I have better things to do. I want to get things done around my house. Although when I was chugging rum and Diet Coke I seemed to get alot of things done. Of course there was the day after when I would be trying to find things and wondering if I had thrown it out the night before in my drunken stuppor. So I will today challenge myself to get all the cleaning and organizing done sober. I've had about 5 cups of coffee. I think I am gonna switch to my sweet tea, get off this computer and get something done today.
:thumbs:

[BecomingMeAtLast]

I'm new to this forum

I'm so glad you poured out that bottle of rum, April! Thanks for sharing.

Be

[lilmea]

I'm new to this forum

You're figuring out what you need to do to stay sober. and you're doing it. You have helped me to stay sober. and I thank you.

[aprilmoon]

I'm new to this forum

Okay Day 29 AF

I got up feeling yucky, but not from drinking. I think I'm getting sick. I got on here and chatted some and then took a nap. I'm feeling good now. I'm fixing (a southern word) to go take a shower and get ready for church. We have supper there and a Bible study. I love my pastor. He is funny and seems to know what I need to hear when I need to hear it. He has no idea what I am like in real life...meaning outside of church, but it seems like he does.

During my nap my husband painted half of our kitchen. It's been in a stage of remodel since the first of the year. I just want it done.....We are down to painting the rest of the room, putting down the floor and new counters. It's gonna be pretty....one day!

I am making sweet tea to drink after church. It's my favorite drink now....pour it over lots of ice and yummy...it's gotta be sweet.

So I do have plans for tomorrow. I have my yearly physical tomorrow morning. I'm going to be discussing some herbs and the meds here with her. I also have to get my yearly blood work done for my cholestrol and blood pressure med refills. Say a prayer that my liver numbers are not up again. Last year I didn't drink the day before going and I hope that is why they were up. If they are up at least I know I'm on the way to hopefully repairing it since I haven't drank in a while.

After my doctor's appointment I am going to my Mama's house. My Dad passed away a year ago tomorrow. She is doing good without him, better than I am. He was a Christain as we are and we know he is loving it in heaven and wouldn't want to be back in his old body anymore. He was a wonderful father and we miss him. Mama wants me to help her clean off the pine straw that's on his grave. So that will be what I'm doing with her. I don't drink around my Mama, so don't call out the hounds on me because I'm not on here. We will be busy. I love staying with my Mama. She has become a very funny person to be around. She will be 78 in April, I think. We usually snack and snack and watch TV and snack some more. Fun Fun Fun......I just know how it was a year ago.

A year ago I spent the night with my Mom and Daddy. He had a heart doctor appointment the next day. She wanted me to drive them to the appointment and because the appointment was so early she wanted me to stay the night. Daddy wasn't eating very much and we tried and tried to get him to eat. He wouldn't. They went to bed and I heard this horrible noise. My Daddy fell. He bumped his head on the night stand and there was a little bleeding on his forehead. I had to pick my Daddy up and get him into bed. He had lost down to below 100 pounds, but he was heavy for me. We got him into bed and were paniced if we should take him to the ER or not. I called my sister and she said call his in home nurse. She asked us alot of questions and then we decided not to take him to the hospital.

He woke up at about 3AM hungry. Mama made him oatmeal and while she was feeding him I was getting him to drink Orange Juice. We all went back to bed.

Mama got us all up early to get ready to go to the doctor. He was insisting that he wasn't going to the doctor. It was storming. I got his wheelchair in the trunk of their car as my Mama was dressing him. The power went out. We had no lights. Mama had to dress him in the dark. He kept taking his shoes off saying he was not going to the doctor. She got him dressed and was walking him down the hallway. He kept saying he needed his wheelchair. I told him I had already put it in the car. I gave him his walker. He was walking down the hallway and into the kitchen with Mama and me helping him. We got past the kitchen and into the dining room. I was in front of him. He said "I'm so tired!" He slumped down and Mama grabbed a chair for him to sit in. He slumped over me and died. Well, I didn't know that he died. I kept yelling his name. Mama said is he dead. I said I think he's had a stroke. Mama held him up as I called 911. The weird part is that I know CPR and I didn't start it. Daddy didn't want to be brought back if it was his time, but that wasn't in my mind. I got back to holding him in the chair and my mama called my sister and her neighbor. The parametics got there and laid him in the floor and were going to begin CPR. I yelled he has a DNR...Do Not Resitate (sp) order. They said find it or we have to start CPR. Mama ran in the computer room and found it and gave it to them. They said this is for a lady (my Mama's orders) we need his. Mama ran and found his and they didn't do the CPR.

Because of the storm, Daddy lay on the floor of their dinning room for over an hour. They did put one of his blankets on him and Mama insisted they give him a pillow. It took an hour for my sister and husband to get there. It usually takes about 35 minutes. The storm had knocked out a lot of traffic lights and the police were busy with wrecks so it took a while for them to come.

The funeral home men came to get him when my husband and sister and niece drove up. I made sure he was on the gurney and not on the floor before they got there.

As soon as they left with my Daddy....we cried a little and then Mama said she was hungry. We waited for Red Lobster to open and we all went for fish and shrimp with red eyes and ugly noses. We made the arrangements that after noon for his funeral.

I was so impressed at all the people who loved my Daddy and came to the visitations and the funeral. Daddy wanted to be buried with his overalls on and a hammer in his hand. He wanted 3 carpenter pencils in his pocket. I thought it was sentamental for us 3 daughters or for the trinity....no he had said it's because somebody is always borowing my pencils so I want 3. LOL

After he retired from his work he built churches as a volenteer. He has been all over the US and Nicaragra building churches. He told us that after everyone tells all the lies about him he wanted Mama to give his hammer to one of the guys he worked with building the church. Mama did that...oh there were no lies told about my Dad. The guy she gave it to was so shocked and loved it.

Well, we are a year after that fateful day. No I'm not gonna drink....I'm just going to go to church and then to my Mama's house tomorrow.

[aprilmoon]

I'm new to this forum

Day 32 AF
I have been busy and I haven't posted to this thread in a while. Since I started blogging on my thread I have read some post that have disturbed me. I hope I never get so many days AF that I will not go to the"Just starting out" forum to help others. I remember day 1 on this site and day 1 AF (same day). I totally felt love by the people who posted well wishes and words of inspiration. If I drink again it will not be called a slip as I have found that word is not tollerated by some long term AF people. Yeah, I guess it will not be a slip because I think about drinking alot, so I guess I can't say I slipped and drank. I know I can't be a moderating drinker. I know me...one drink leads to a bunch and then a bunch of days. I just can't mod. I do appreciate those who can. I wish I could, but I abuse AL too much to even think of modding. For those who don't mod, don't be haters of those who can. I kid and say I hate them. I don't think I have said that on this site. I have said that I "hate" my husband because he can drink one drink a month or months.....I don't hate my husband....I just wish I could be that way. In my pee brain, AL is for getting drunk. It's not for social drinking and it's not to sip on... AL is to get knee walking drunk on. So you see why I can't mod.

Because I know I can't mod, my plan is abstinance (sp). Will I ever drink again? Well, I'm not so stupid to think I will never drink again, but I sure hope I don't. Also if I do drink, I will say so on this site and hope that "my friends" here will not be mean to me and give me "tough love". I hope they will be kind and give me the words of wisdom that I need to get back up and continue not drinking.

Don't worry, I haven't had a drink and I don't plan on drinking. I will admit last week I was planning a drinking weekend. My husband is going to be away 2 weekend this month. I was thinking he will never know and I can get away with it. Well, it's March and the feeling of wanting to drink as gone away. I think it was that "almost to 30 days" syndrom (for lack of a better word) that I have heard other people going thur.

Okay enough of that......What have I done since I blogged last. Oh yeah for the person who said this isn't a place to blog....too bad...this is my thread and until a moderator says I can't blog here, I will.

I went to spend the day and night with my Mama. It was the 1year anniversary of the death of my Daddy. She went to her bible study and we (my sister and niece) went to clean off the pine straw from Daddy's grave. Mama is doing really good. She misses Daddy, but she knows he is in heaven and she will meet him there one day. We went to a sea food resturant. I had fish and Mama had shrimp. This is the same lunch we had the day Daddy died. So we are going to make it a traditition.

We have had bad storms and are waiting on snow today. It's a weird weather we have been having. Normally I would have made sure I was stocked up on Rum for the storms. I have none in the house and I'm not planning on getting any. Woo Hoo.

It's Sunday and I'm up way too early. I'm going to go to church and enjoy the day.

April (3/1/9)

[lilmea]

I'm new to this forum

Aprilmoon,

I know this is a sad time of the year for you. You sound very close to your parents.

32 days is great! I think it's great that you recognized you were planning a slip and then you set your mind that you weren't going to drink and then you didn't. Good for you.

[aprilmoon]

I'm new to this forum

lilmea;559827 wrote: Aprilmoon,

I know this is a sad time of the year for you. You sound very close to your parents.

32 days is great! I think it's great that you recognized you were planning a slip and then you set your mind that you weren't going to drink and then you didn't. Good for you.

I had help....from you!:l:thanks:

[savon19]

I'm new to this forum

Unless there are two "Aprilmoons'... you have been here since Jan. '09 and have posted 312 times!

No comprendo...?!

I didn't think you could use the same username as someone else, but if that's what happened, it's also odd that you use the same avatar...