The Infamous Tomorrow

[Next, please]

So...

This was one of my last posts, although I admit to habitually stalking this site. Newbies beware! I see your posts. Feel your pain.

From the time between this current post and my last post , I have struggled with addiction. It's all becoming too familiar with me. How hard it is to pull myself from a binge and get through Day1. Also, how wonderful I feel after I haven't drank in a week or more.

I've been struggling with the letting go. I don't know if there is anything left to be said or read. I know what I need to do. There is no doubt in my mind that I am better, and thus able to create a better life for myself, without ANY AL.

My head knows this. My heart knows this. But there seems to be a major disconnect between these things and action. WTF?

[Byrdlady]

When you get sick enough of it, you will let it go. I hung on til it was almost too late....what was I clinging to? Fear held me in place. The fear of being AF is much worse than the reality of it. I wish I had done it 10 years sooner. Stick around, we can help. Byrdie

[j-vo]

Look at my join date, Next. And I'd been lurking before that. I'm on 55 or so days, and I've struggled with the same thing. But I am tired of the struggle. It is what it is. A life that we just can't drink. That's the only thing we can't do. And we can't have hangovers, we can't have the GSR's, we can't have all of that. Damn! Not a bad deal when you think about it. Hang in there and hang in the nest. Lotsa twigs open.

[Next, please]

Ah Byrdie, you have already helped. I've read your story and hundreds of your touching posts. I have actually thought of you several times when I was stashing/ hiding/ secretly consuming AL. And, I wasn't feeling pleasure, happiness, or anything positive (you are missing NOTHING). I felt shame and sadness. I thought specifically of you, a pretty much perfect stranger whom had pulled herself up, from what you had shared...similar circumstances.

It is a handful of people, of which you are at the top of the list, that gives me the strength to keep fighting.

[Next, please]

J-VO,

If I could remember my very first username, I might have you beat in the "Join Date".

Not something to be proud of in Newbie's Nest...however, I look forward to seeing you there. Save me a twig!

[little beagle]

I see so many people thinking a magic date will help them quit. That date never comes. Today is always the best day to stop drinking.
Thanks for the poem.