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Goals??? Where to start...Help?

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    #16
    Goals??? Where to start...Help?

    The first goals I made when I decided to cut back on drinking were...

    #1) Never drive drunk again (well, specifically, never above the legal limit - I looked at BAC charts to figure out what I would allow myself).

    #2) Never drink enough to be hungover.

    I was trying to think of goals and those were the two things that were the MOST offensive of my behavior. The drunk driving was actually what made me realize that I had indeed developed a serious problem. I never got a DUI or got in an accident, but I knew that was just a matter of time if I didn't get my drinking under control.

    Well, under my own means and willpower, I failed. I drove drunk again after making this promise to myself. So, I decided to see my doctor ASAP and started working the MWO program (using Naltrexone instead of Topamax as the med to help me, though). I'm still not sure what my long-term goal is, but I'm able to mod quite well on the Naltrexone. It helps me to approach moderating as really mostly abstaining w/maybe one day/week where I go out socially and not drink more than three drinks. You can check my id under the DrinkTracker link to see what this looks like. I simply don't drink at home. I only have social drinks out and then I sip very slowly. The Naltrexone and supps/vitamins help me a lot w/cravings and limiting my alcohol when I do drink. Basically, on Naltrexone, I don't get buzzed from drinking, just relaxed and then tired. Physically, it makes it so that I really can't drink more than three drinks because it would make me too tired.

    I really love being able to moderate in this way. It means I can still enjoy wine when I'm out w/friends or for a special dinner, but just not as much. I'm not sure if I will be able to moderate like this when I'm off of the Naltrexone, though. I might eventually have to be completely AF and I'm willing to accept that over going back to being out of control, if necessary.

    I understand what people mean when they say mods is hard because you are always plotting and planning for the times you will drink. With the Naltrexone, I don't feel this way. I honestly have a take-it-or-leave-it attitude w/the alcohol now. I once tried to mod in a similar way (AF six days w/one day per week allowed for drinking moderately), but without the help of medication and it was SO HARD and such a DISASTER. I was obsessing so much about the one day I would drink and then I would go totally overboard.

    Anyway, I am rambling. Good luck to you!!!

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