New here and starting Topa and with a question

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi All,
I'm thinking, DRAT, DRAT, DRAT, why did I have to go off to Spain without a supply of Topa when I knew that I needed to stay on it forever and now it is not working so far the second time around. Well, I went without it because I didn't have enough to last for as long as I was there, I need to be much better prepared for the unexpected, that's if it does work again for me.

But seriously, thanks Sun for reminding me to be positive and have patience, but GEE it worked in only 3 days before at only 25mg. Now I'm like you 2Run, up to 25AM and 25PM, none of that wonderful tingling or anything, how awful, and OMG I'm hungry all the time and why don't I have any WILL POWER???? I will never figure that one out.

There seem to be a few new faces here and I am so glad that you are here on this wonderful thread. I'm happy that more people are trying TOPA even though it is so fickle and perhaps we are learning from sharing our experiences with it.

And Sun, yes, even tho you always say that you don't think the Topa is really doing anything, I bet it is silently doing its' job, so please up the dosage, smart move.

Love and Take Care,
Play

[2Run]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Bah, Play, I'm right with you. Did you have some weight loss last time too? I did some research on the internet (I know, always a great idea and there were varying opinions about whether or not it works for appetite second time around, leaning more heavily towards it not working. Now, who knows, this could have been all people like us in the early weeks, posting before giving it more time and a higher dose. Quite a few things I read said it should work second time around for binge/obsessive behavior related to food and AL (so, different than appetite control, more binge eating and drinking issues). I also read that it should work again for migraines. So, where that leaves us I don't know. With a SHOULD and a COULD and a MIGHT. I think I'm going to go up to 100 and stay there for maybe 2 weeks and then re-asses. Just hanging out on this medicine that's doing me no good, at the risk of losing my hair again just isn't worth it but I also want to give it a fair go. 150 is my absolute max but I'm not sure about even going that high...
I'm trying to be really good about tracking my calories on MyFitnessPal and including every single calorie of alcohol to really gross myself out. I've never been good about doing that as far as including the AL and man is it disgusting! What on earth!?! I've totally ignored the fact that one of my lovely giant glasses of white wine is 350 calories. No more, no more, no more. And no wonder I have to work out so much! Goodness.
Anyway, sorry for the self hating rant. Sun, did you decide to go up? Play, when do you go to 75mg? One other thing I noticed Play, both you and I did the 50mg as 25mg AM and 25mg PM but I noticed that the titration schedule shows the 50mg as all taken in the PM. I doubt it but I wonder if that messed us up at all?

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi everyone - I have no idea if any of you read other threads or not but I caved and had a drink a few days ago. I had gone way down on the Topa - not that that is any excuse but am back up again. That is all I am saying. just had one and felt so stupid about it. Have no idea why I even did it. Anyway back on the horse eh? Play - hope the Topa starts to kick in soon for you. i found it worked differently every time I took it, and I so hope it starts working for you again soon.

Needingchange - the book that does it for me is The easy Way to Control your Drinking by Allen Carr. The Vale Book that everyone is raving about is sort of a knock off of it - Vale worked with Carr. Neither of them have any magic words - they both just work on changing ones mindset - I obviously need to re-read mine! LOL

2Run - sorry you are in the same boat as Play - must be so frustrating for the both of you. I remember wanting so badly for IT to happen for me in the early days too. But half of me was pleased when it didn't too..... anyway, see how it goes - as you said, maybe go up to the 100 and then re-assess. See how you feel - maybe try the L-Glut? I know- I am like a broken record with that stuff aren't I?

Anyway everyone, I am off to England tomorrow. Hopefully I will be able to post when I am over there. Everyone I am staying with has computers but obviously won't be able to use them much. Would like to just check in though..... Hope you all keep well and that things start looking up for you.

Love and hugs, Sun X

[blondie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Not again - another long post and I got logged out. Off to re-type in Word (if I can remember it all).
BRB!!

[blondie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Diary of A Topa Whinger ? Part Deux

Sunshinedaisies ? hope you have a great trip to England ? lovely time to be visiting! Are you taking your Topa supplies? And yes, very glad I didn?t cave last week (day 30 for me on Sat ? St Patrick?s Day, to be sure!)

Playland ? Good that you are getting back into the Topa but concerning that the effects aren?t quite the same this time round. And how quickly it is getting back into old habits/routines!

Speaking of which ? I am at the stage where I am ready to give up on Topa, despite the low dosage. I have really had enough of the continuous, draining fatigue, the headaches and even the blurry vision is adding to my frustrations. But then, I know how quickly the cravings come back (1.5 days!) and I don?t want to risk drinking again. At present, the thought couldn?t be further from my mind; seeing people drinking just makes me feel they are missing out (not to mention having to suffer the boring/inane ?conversation?!) But this isn?t the quality of life I was expecting after giving up alcohol (and, I might add, losing about 14lbs without even trying!). Sure, every day I fill out my ?sober? calendar feels great and is great motivation, but then that?s it. I have about 12 days? supply left and then I?ll speak with my doctor; I guess it?s a simple choice of Topa or not! Perhaps I should start upping the LGlut and see if that will tide me over?!

Well, despite another seemingly negative post, if you dig deep enough, there are a few positives in there. Honestly!

I am now off into the day to? not do anything too strenuous?:H

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

OMG, I Must ReRead The Last Day Of All These Posts, I Just Can't Make Sense of Them, We are All Going In the Same Circles, When will we ever Find Our Way Our of the Maze???? I so seriously wonder if we ever will, sorry to sound so discouraged, tomorrow is another day and I promise to be more optimistic!!!
Will reply to everyones' posts tomorrow when I have had time to reread and reflect on all of your thoughts and comments. Please don't give up the Topa, even if you are tempted, it won't work out, believe me, stay on it, that's all I can say for now, except that I hope it works for me again and if it does I will stay on it forever because it is worth it.

love and hugs until tomorrow,
play

[2Run]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Have a great trip Sun! Hope you are able to check in.
Blondie - Forgive if I've already asked this (topa fog!) but is this your first time on topa?
Play - SO TRUE! Round and round and round we go. Sometimes I feel like it IS working, just quieter than before, and I'm just not listening, and then I think it's not working at all. Mostly I just feel SO DARN TIRED. Seriously. I don't remember feeling this exhausted before. Boo.
Hugs all,
2Run

[playland]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hello Everyone,
I hope everyone is doing ok and I am hoping that one of us finds success and the way out of the maze very soon. Next Monday I will increase dosage to 50AM & 50PM, no relief in sight yet, very discouraged.

Much love, hugs & talk soon,
play

[WaitingToExhale]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hello my old friends (and newer people here as well)!

I can’t even remember the last time I posted here. And I am back to drinking as bad if not worse than before. UGH.

WHY the Topa did nothing for me (but make me goofy) and then worked a miracle for a while – until I took a vacation to Greece and it started all over again. I stopped Topa long ago but have been seriously considering it again.

It IS so progressive and I now get cravings really bad in the mornings as well before I even finish my first cup of coffee. I’m screwing at my work, and being the boss I have managed to put a staff in place that many days I really just don’t NEED to go in. So instead I promise myself I will do paperwork and end up at the store sometimes as early as 8 AM buying 2 bottles of wine! It’s nuts! I am losing day after day and all the promises I make to myself about things I will get done, just never seem to happen. My Christmas decorations are still in a pile in my back room waiting to get packed and get into storage. Yesterday I think I slept on the sofa for at least ? of the day and then went to bed at 8 PM.

Then like many of us, I get up this morning pissed off at myself (again!) and yet I am already feeling the cravings again. Thank goodness there is nothing in the house!

I feel depressed and nothing seems fun or interesting anymore. It’s like life s just passing me by. I hated the SEs of Topa (thinning hair and tired) but I MUST do something.

If I try this again – it will be for the 4th time. Awful. The last time was a year ago January and I only stayed on it for about 10 days. I did TSM for over a year without really seeing results so gave that up as well.

Sun – You are right – each time it is different. The time it “worked” for me was after about 3 weeks and I had gone up to 50/50. I went from about 60 glasses of wine a week (yikes!) to 2 glasses the week before Greece.

Houtx! Hey stranger! So you are thinking about Topa again as well?

I still have all my charts of progress (or lack of) and for me, I know just tracking helps me control better. Right now, it’s just a sure thing that I will drink 2 bottles (at least) per day.

Well, just wanted to say hello to everyone and I guess I best get back on this bandwagon. Wishing everyone the best!

WTE

[WaitingToExhale]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

So I a back on the bandwagon and began Topa again last evening ... 50mg.

The last time I had some success, I started weighing in at 139#. I drop weight like crazy on Topa for some reason and got all the way down to something like #115 which is WAY too light at 5’9”.

For those of you that are trying to lose weight – don’t hate me. But for those that are having the same issue – how are you dealing with it? I am starting now at 122# so I can’t afford to lose any pounds this time around.

I also took a L-Glut cap in the morning and ended up feeling really queasy. They say to take between meals and it was on an empty stomach. Thoughts? I ordered the powder as I have since read that is much more effective that the caps (which is all I have now).

Well – wish me luck that the magic happens before I totally give up …

WTE

[2Run]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi WTE-
Good luck!!!! I'm also about 5'9" and can't imagine weighing 115!! Yikes! 135 is my happy weight but anything lower than 125 would look a little scary. Why do you lose on topa do you think? Do you not eat much? For me, it seemed like I would have days when I didn't eat a ton but also if I had days where I ate a lot, it didn't make a difference on the weight loss. I lost about 25-30# on my longest stretch of topa which was about 8 months. Did you lose weight every time? Did it curb your AL cravings every time? If so, that's great news for you! Why did you decide to start at 50 and not 25? Maybe that's what made you queasy this morning? I take l-Glut (when I remember) on an empty stomach and do fine.
Keep us posted and hang in there!!
I'm up to 50/50 now and might finally be feeling something...
Hugs,
2Run

[hope10]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I have been on topamax for about three years. I got all the way up to 300mg. It never really did anything for me with cravings except it did make me lose weight. I am kind of like waitingtoexhale. I was around 135 before I started topa and got down to about 117 and I am 5'8. Before that I was always happy at about 125. I was really depressed and stressed at 135 but I am always obsessed with my weight.

So now, I am trying to quit drinking again. I just finished being AF for 10 days, but then slipped. Now I am on day 3. I have only been on 100mg of topa for about 6 months and noticed that I put on about 5lbs. Actually, as I started lowering the dose of topa, the weight came back on. Now I am at about 130 and I am hating everyday b/c I feel fat. It is sickening but I have started taking 150mg of topa for the past 2 days hoping to lose weight.

The side effects of topa are awful!!! The reason I wanted to get off were b/c of my hair thinning!!! Just after two days of being on this drug, I am exhausted, sleeping everyday at around 3 for a nap and my eyes are blurry. I am terrified of the eye issues that topamax can cause. The FDA warning is serious stuff! I need to just get off of this stupid drug and deal with my weight issues head on!

[meggie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Well, waiting to exhale, you have been here as long as me. I have had such up and down, I quit for the year 2007-2008. thought I could be one of those who could go back and not have problems. yeah, right, started again, even worse. Instead of wine, gin is my baby. I am going through a bottle a week. I don't crave in morning, I have started the l-glut powder, one night it worked well, the next I drank too much. I am on Campral and I don't think it works, the topamax was great for weight loss but once you go off it comes right back on. the side effects with memory are awful. Luck to all.

[WaitingToExhale]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hey 2Run!: Yeah, I was looking pretty scary at that first weight lost! And ? I can?t say Topa was really seeming to work all that much so I gave up. I then tried TSM for almost a year ? nothing. I am now CONVINCED that unless you are a binge drinker (which I am not) that TSM is not a program that works. I was in that 20% . *sigh* So gave that up too.

It was back in Sept 2010 that I decided to try Topa again. I have NO CLUE why it was different or what happened other than I was SO SICK from drinking and disgusted with myself. I suspect much was a mindset. I had gone back up to normal weight, etc. I was on it mostly 50 and then moved to 25/50 the 3rd week and all off a sudden I had control! I was passing liquors without stopping ? and had my first AF days in YEARS!

Sadly (and I think it?s in this post somewhere) I went to Greece for 2 weeks with a large singles group. I took my Topa with me ? but forgot it (or just didn?t care in the party mood) and blew it). I had lost a few pounds in those first few weeks, but nothing dramatic. Gave up again ..

Restarted again when I got home at about 130# and lasted a few more weeks. I get down right FLAKEY and even forget to take it!

So no, not major weight loss except the 1st time when I was it longer but it did not seem to control anything.

I think I am skinny now because I have just been stressed and am using wine as my caloric intake instead of good food ? not a past habit. So TODAY I went grocery shopping for real food! HA! I had not been on my scale for months so had no idea what I weighed, but wanted a ?start point? for the Topa and actually was a bit surprised?.

Oh, And I re-started at 50 because when I had ?success? that is what I had done. I had bought 100 mg tabs and to get them to 25 mg is almost impossible to get accurate even with a pill cutter. Tonight I just took another 50 mg. I learned to take in the PM for the tired side affect instead of the AMs - at least for me. Learning curves!

Hope 10: I can?t imagine 300 mg a day! I am goofy at 75! I had a bit of hair thinning a tired, but took it mostly in the evening. Hope you take care and are abke tro control at a lower level!

Hugs to all!

WTE
xo

[WaitingToExhale]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

And Meggie - Hang in there! Screw the weight loss, hair thinning etc ... do we want to be alive??? LOL Thats kinda where I am at!