New here and starting Topa and with a question

[Alky]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Stuck, it took me 7 years (I didn't make any progress for 2 of those), but there is no better feeling than being Phinally Done. I went from a major research university to a small liberal arts college where the emphasis really is on teaching. At a faculty appreciation dinner the President said, "We don't expect you to win a Nobel, but we do expect it of our students." Also, it's nice to work in a setting where your needs are anticipated and met before you even have to ask.

[StuckinLA]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Thanks, Alky. I'm in year 6 now (EDIT: and yeah there was at least a year or two that I made no progress either, just teaching and drinking), and so it'll be 7 when I'm done (I'm not being "pushed out," but there is now a contractual obligation to finish next year - so one way or another, grad school ends May 2015). I am keeping my options very open after - I would have no problem being in a small liberal arts college - I'm planning to apply for postdocs, tenure-track postions, and maybe even an MFA program or two. Location is high on my list of priorities, and things have gotten more complicated now that there's a Significant Other involved. We shall see. Again, thanks for your encouraging words.

[treetops]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Completely off topic but I am cruising the site today In my country New Zealand PhDs now usually can only take 3-4 years and that's even with lots of fieldwork. It's to do with funding.
So it's very intense.

[meggie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Well, we have a large group of educated drinkers. It must be the perfectionist attitude we have. Well, proud of all you guys. I would have started drinking if I was locked in a room and had to write.
Wondering if this drinking problem is bigger then me. Do I need to go to rehab. I need to stop this or it will kill me.

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi there - quick fly by as I am on my way out to my garden to start moving a ton of top soil!

Meggie - rehab will help you - up to a point. You still have to live when you get out of rehab - how badly do you want to stop? Have you tried Antabuse? I can't remember if you have or haven't. If not - why not try it - it takes drinking OUT of the equation - you just cannot drink! I know it helped me in the past - as the starter for me. Consider it eh?

Houtx - you always come and post and say that you will be back and post more - then your next post says the same thing - we need you to come back and post more - LOL. How are things going? Are you taking any Antabuse ?

Stuck - you sound sort of down as usual. Laughed at your analogy re the director!!

Gum - I so hope that it is the Topa kicking in for you and yes, get back to the AB on Monday! Baby steps - any AF time is good and helps your body and your brain I think !!

Well people - it is over a month since I had a cig and over two weeks since I had a drink! I am feeling amazing and this morning my BP was 109/71 !! It really has made such a difference !! I am feeling very good too .....

Off to start digging,

hugs, Sun XX

[StuckinLA]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

meggie;1647948 wrote:
Wondering if this drinking problem is bigger then me. Do I need to go to rehab. I need to stop this or it will kill me.

I don't think anything in your life is bigger than you. Rehab might help - I don't have any experience with rehab, so can't say anything one way or another about it. Most of the time when we think about giving up because the fight is too hard, we think that means drinking. But sometimes when I quit for a while, I trick myself into thinking *that* is giving up. The fight with booze was just too difficult every day, so I stopped fighting and stopped drinking. Works once in a while.

[StuckinLA]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hey what's up, everybody??

How was the weekend? Hope we all made it. Another week starting already, but at least we have new Mad Men episodes to look forward to, no? I haven't done a whole lot, just vaguely working on some writing and the diss chapter, which I sent to my advisor this afternoon. We'll see how that goes. Now this week still I guess supposed to be working on finishing the chapter, and whatever else. Two weeks before Europe. Clock's ticking.

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Stuck .... yes I had a great weekend thanks - worked in the garden on Saturday then baked for a few hours so was wiped by bedtime !! But the whole weekend was really good - still cannot believe I am AF and cig free !!

Where in Europe are you going? What fun - I cannot decide whether or not to go this year .... no rush to decide I suppose but I so hate the journey!

This thread really has gone quiet over the past few months .... maybe it has had it's day? Just a thought .....

Hugs to all,

sun XXX

[meggie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I know, it has been quiet. Where is play? It picks up every once in a while. I do see by searching the site, many post on other sites.
Sun, so proud of you. Smoking is hard, I did it 25 years ago. During that time it was ok to smoke. Now there is so much judgement regarding smoking and drinking.
Quitting is hard, I know if I stop drinking I will feel better and lose the weight. I know I always talk about it but do nothing. Such a weakling.

[StuckinLA]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

sunshinedaisies;1649285 wrote:

Where in Europe are you going? What fun - I cannot decide whether or not to go this year .... no rush to decide I suppose but I so hate the journey!

This thread really has gone quiet over the past few months .... maybe it has had it's day? Just a thought .....

Yeah, maybe. I've been mostly over MWO for a while now, just pop in to see if anything's going on in this thread and maybe check a couple others. More like a nervous tick these days, the same as I click on Facebook. But hey, my nervous ticks have needs, too! Y'all need to post more! :H

Kidding of course. Anyway, I'm going with friends to Croatia and Italy for a couple weeks, then Paris with the girl.

[meggie]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

I should check out the other sites to check on what is new for alcohol.

[gumtree]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi Everyone,

Hope you're all doing Ok,
Meggie, how's that pup of yours, still driving your husband a bit crazy? The young years sure do take patience! And sometimes the middle years too....my youngest rescue is STILL an incredible challenge to me. Love her dearly, but man she has some crazy marbles spinning around some days. and this long winter has made for some extra spring fever in my pups!! So these past two weeks the pups haven't had as much of my time as they'd like, and my youngest is rebelling. Lots of evenings she'll bark at me demanding more play time, run around the house barking and scratching at stuff to get my attention, asking out when she doesn't need out just to get me way from the computer. A couple of nights ago this is going on while I'm working late and my husband has already gone to bed. Well it turns out she actually was asking out to go pee. My husband told me she'd already been out before he went to bed, so I was ignoring her assuming she was just acting out. Turns out she hadn't had a pee outside, she'd faked it to get a treat. Smart pup. So what does she finally do? She not only pees on the bed, but pees on my husband while he's sleeping in the bed. OMG the covers and sheets were soaked! So 11pm we're washing sheets and duvet while exhausted, and it's not her fault because she was asking out, but I thought she was just being a pain and asking for attention. C'est la vie!

Sun, am really impressed with you, go SUN! and your BP is amazing! Goes to show what even a bit of alcohol and smokes can do. Are you craving much, or finding your groove and not struggling?

Stuck, your trip sounds wonderful. Croatia is on my list of must visits. And with the winter you've had, you deserve a break from writing and teaching. Plus, Paris with the girl in spring? not too shabby

I managed to get through my exam on the weekend - looks like a success, but nothing official yet. Monday once it was all done I felt like I'd been hit by a truck - had been going on adrenaline all week, and finally crashed. But had a full and packed work week to get through, starting bright and early with my counselor Monday morning before work asking how my drinking was going. Well, since I hadn't had a single AF day that past week, she wasn't too impressed. But still, I pointed out that I wasn't finishing a whole bottle of wine like I used to in the past, and it was an insanely stressful week. Give me a break!!!

Still have to write up and submit a huge assignment and post it of by Tuesday as my final piece of this certification - so that's pretty much any and all of my free time this Easter weekend. And two family dinners take up the rest, one of which I'm hosting. Not as stressed as last week, but not relaxed either!

Drinking wise? Still not back on AB, still drinking daily. have giving myself until Tuesday. Making excuses? Sure am!

Topa wise, I have been holding back at 125 for weeks (went up to 150, felt too tired, went back down to 125 since I needed to study a lot this month). So tonight I'm going back up to 150.

My daily drinking amounts this past week: sometimes I went back up to the full bottle, and felt like crap the next day, but other days stopped at a half bottle. Just didn't feel like having more - preferred water or my almond mild. Definitely think that's the topa kicking in a bit.

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

Hi there - swift reply as I have to leave for work - Gum, so good to see you again. Sounds like you are really busy - and I agree - that is no excuse for not not drinking but so understand !! Hopefully things are starting to settle down and you can concentrate more on it ??

No - I am having no cravings at all - with the work that my therapist and I did, plus some stuff that I am reading, I have a total indifference to AL. I am finding it amazing and scary all at the same time. Keep thinking it will go away and the old feelings will come back - I have not felt like this for years and years. But I truly just have no desire for AL at all. And the cigs too - although I did use the e-cig to stop, I might have three puffs total in one day on the e-cig - I forget about it !! yesterday my first puff was at 3.30 p.m.

Must dash - will try and post more later,

Hugs, Sun XX

[DizzyBee]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

StuckinLA;1645171 wrote: ...and on July 4th she should be here. Kind of like the opposite of Independence Day, right? .

I also had to laugh... Got married last year on 4th of July, never really thought about it that way!

I had a awful 'welcome back to the UK' flu but am now better.

Bed time but will post more tomorrow!

:l:l:l

[sunshinedaisies]

New here and starting Topa and with a question

DizzyBee;1651721 wrote:

Bed time but will post more tomorrow!

:l:l:l

Looking forward to seeing you again Diz - I miss you !! Sorry about your flu - yuck!

off to work ....