Can't Take It

[Cinders]

Can't Take It

Janka,

You are doing so amazingly well, despite him. Yea!!

He is playing horrible head games with you and all I can suggest is that at this point, you step back and look at it from the outside so he can't "engage" you in the games.

I am glad you got your daughter back safe and sound, I would have been a complete mess with worry.

Take care and be strong, and I am finally going to stick my neck out and say, you will be so much better off without him. (I usually don't give advice on relationships)

He is only adding crap to your life. I suggest an enema.

Love,
Cindi

[janka]

Can't Take It

Hi db and thanks ... yes, I probably would; however, it is very difficult to rebuild the financial and emotional mess that will ensue. The thing is ... i have totally wasted 25+ years with him, and that truly kills me. If only he could own up a bit .... he can't. I am extrememly angry and at this point will b e as mean to him as he has been to me. Sorry to be such a bother ... it's a beautiful day here in CT, cool and sunny. Hope all is well

[Niblet]

Can't Take It

Janka, please never again mention that you are being a "bother" and I speak for the rest all MWO members...
Enjoy the sunshine sweetie !!!
Just a thought, " We can always hope that he is pushing you through the ultimate test to see if you will remain AF " I don't know.... Maybe things can still have time to become better?... You are an amazing, good person. Know that we are all sending you positive vibes to help you through this difficult time in your life... Hugs,

[janka]

Can't Take It

hi niblet and thanks. Here's my biggest problem/issue with the whole thing. i know and have known that, even though he has been sober a a very long time, he is/has been sicker than I more recently on a daily basis. he is/has been absolutely dismal, miserable, negative since college 1979-83. my kids friends crack jokes about him, call him "socially challenged," as he creates a pall over everything and anything. that makes/made me feel bad for a very long time, but i'd always try to cheer him up, make him laugh, ease his load -- he doesn't/cannot see that. very troublesome. seems like ke has no depth whatsoever. really would like to understand that kind of personality, j

[Suzanna]

Can't Take It

Oh Janka, I really do relate to you at this time. My marriage is a mess and the financial thing has probably been the thing that keeps me here. He is what I call a "fringe" person. I know people look at us and wonder why I am here, but it is comfortable and not a bother because truth is we leave each other alone. More than you want to know, I am sorry. It's never easy especially with children involved! Head games suck, I have checked out mentally so it is not an issue here, he is not smart enough to play anyway. :h Suz

P.S. you are going strong and that is so great, I am really thinking you are my new hero!

[janka]

Can't Take It

you know suzanna, you said the smartest thing to me ... many, i say many, wonder why i am with him, but i am all so quiet around the kids

[MyHeartIsDrenchedInWine]

Can't Take It

Janka & Suzanna, I can relate to you both. Hang in there!