I moved to Florida with a year of sobriety. My brother needed a roomate to share his apartment while he was going to school. It should be noted that his intentions were good. He thought it would be good for me to be down here. It turned out to be anything but. Most of my monthly income goes to rent plus bills leaving me broke by the middle of the month. My mother is giving me money to get through the month which is making me sick. I relapsed in July after only being here a month and am still using.The financial stress did me in.Last week I told him I wanted to leave and go back to NJ where I have freinds family and AA meetings (that I like) but he wants me to stay until May. It seems like I am being held hostage here. I am in my mid 40's and a guy 13 years younger than me is controlling me. I stayed sober making alot of my own decisions. The question I have and need advice on is am I hurting my brother by saying I want to leave before May? I feel bad about this whole thing. Like i let him down but he really did nothing to help me once I got down here. Like understand what I am going through. I am on disability for severe anxiety also. So this lack of comunication and understanding is making my anxiety worse. I just want to make the right decision before I leave here. I can use all the advice I can get right now.
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Jackson,
Wow, I am sorry for your situation. While I am fairly new here, I would like to give you my opinion. I think you need to do what is best for YOU. Sounds to me like going back to NJ is the best thing for you right now. Let your brother know it is the healthy decision for you and my guess is he will understand. Don't feel that you are hurting your brother or letting him down. You need to ask yourself "Am I letting myself down by staying?" Have you been able to find an AA group in Florida that you can go to for some face to face advice? I wish you the best of luck. PM anytime. Hugs -
Need advice
I, too, think you need to do what is best for you. Without your health, you won't be much good to anyone, including yourself...Comment
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I could not have said it better . . .
Both ChoppersMom and Accounts are absolutely correct. Go back to NJ and be happy.
All the best and I hope you will stay in touch with the Great people here at MWO.Comment
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HAND ON IN THERE
My advice to you, is to get back to your AA meetings FAST and let them know what what is happening in your life at the monent. Also keep in close touch with this site, as this is your meeting between meetings. Do not worry about upsetting your Brother, as he will be more upset if you went back drinking and became ill again or died through the drink. You have worked hard to get the sobriety that you have, no one can take that away from you but you could give it away. Play the tape forward, you know what would happen if you took the first drink again. Ask yourself, is anything worth giving up your sobriety for. I do not think your Brother would thank you, he would most likley turn you out, then what would you have achived. NOTHING hang on in there it is worth it.Comment
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It might be a good idea to have a "heart to heart" with your brother, letting him know that you're unhappy and getting more anxious.
Perhaps you could hang in there until he got another roommate?Sometimes you have to take the leap and build your wings on the way down... Anais NinComment
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