Again

[mollyka]

Again

Sweetheart, everyone before me has said everything, all I can do is add my thoughts for you here. Getting back up after 'relapsing' to me was much much harder than the initial giving up, it's like Sheri says, you've 'woken the beast'! but it just takes more of that determination YOU KNOW YOU HAVE, white knuckle it for a couple of days and like Neart says break it up into tiny little elements of time. I hope you are asleep now and wake up in the morning read here and just DECIDE, today is the day. If it's any consolation, I know exactly how you feel been there, done that etc. and the only positive I could take out of the situation was that I was able to get back on the wagon quickly, so make that something you can be really proud of. Come on girl - we need you here! Oh and make sure you have plenty of sober time (my doc reckons 36 -48 hrs) before you take that Antabuse.
Molly:l

[twosox40]

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Just wanted to let you know your in my prayers, you can do it, you know you can! Just don't leave this place!!

Twosox

[OverIt2007]

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Oh Gosh, Im not sure when this was posted. Today? Yesterday? You doing OK girly????

Dont ever think that you should go away until this under control?? Thats crazy talk. That kind of thinking is the exact opposite of what this place is for! Isnt this place supposed to be of HELP???

Thinking about you Sweetie. Hope to see you posting soon to see more where things are with you.

[mama bear]

Again

Mama and Over It will come drag you by your hair to stay with us if you disappear!!!!!
This is what we are here for baby...support, tough love, encouragerment

[newstart32]

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Just wanted to let you know that I am one of the many people pulling for you. I am obviously very new at this, but I would think you should use this as a place for support. Don't pull away because you've made a mistake. Use the community to lift you back up to where you were before!

[hart]

Again

K9, I have slipped many a time, but one thing I know, if I don't keep trying I will NEVER STOP. I also know I have a firm community of people who understand what I am going thru and are on my side. With that information, I keep going. We both have to keep plugging away. Now either keep coming and trying or give me your address and I will personally deliver a "Pep talk" (Now where did I put those boxing gloves?)

[Finding myself]

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K9, Keep posting weather your ready to start day one again or not. Just being here is help. You are one of the few that I actually cheak up on. You have helped me tremendously you will never know. I am on day one again and starting over! You can to! Whaterver you decide for today we will all be here. Wishing you luck and strengnth to start day one again when your ready!

[K9Lover]

Again

Not going anywhere!

I am here and not going anywhere...because I really don't know what I would do without you guys! Unfortunately I have awoken the beast and it's going to be a struggle to put it back to sleep...a struggle, yes, impossible, NO. I am picking up my Antabuse today, I hate to be so "dependent" it, but whatever it takes to get me over this hump. Thank you so much everyone...sending much love to you all!!!! :h

[mere]

Again

Way to go K9 - I'm new to all this but you are inspiring and help me so much in my struggle. Glad you are feeling better.

[K9Lover]

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Ugh. As I was getting dressed this morning I saw all my bruises from my last relapse when I fell in the shower. I can't believe that I am not even healed from my last stupid mistake and I did it again last night! I'm just glad I didn't make a complete fool of myself by texting or emailing or calling...but I still feel so bad about myself right now. I am at work and hate this feeling. I want to go home at lunch time and take a nap. Plus I have something going on with my eye, it's super red and I'm not sure if it's infected or pink eye or what...I want to just crawl under a rock right now. My emotions are just all over the place today.

[Cinders]

Again

K9,

...but I still feel so bad about myself right now

There is only one way to be sure you don't feel bad about yourself.

You know what it is.

I remember once hubby shoved me in the shower and said to me, "omg, I understand why you drink. You are so ugly."

I was sober enough to remember that.

You are not where I am. You are a K9 lover and you love your children more than alcohol.

Get in that shower/tub and sober up.

You can do this. I know. I have been there, done that.

Just choose.

Life or death. Who would be negatively inpacted if you choose death?

It is that simple/that dificult.

You can do this.

Cindi

[not tonight]

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K9Lover;959887 wrote: . Plus I have something going on with my eye, it's super red and I'm not sure if it's infected or pink eye or what...I want to just crawl under a rock right now. My emotions are just all over the place today.

I had the same thing happen to my eye a couple of months ago. Large red blotch in the white of the eye? It was nothing serious (just looked awful) It took just over two weeks to clear up. If it is more that just red (feels infected, weeping) then you should probably get it looked at.

Have you tried taking Evening Primrose Oil? I have found it really helps smooth out my mood swings or depression. So much so that I swear, if I ran out in the middle of the night my husband would risk throwing a brick through the window of our local health food store to get more. Take care of yourself today. Healthy food and loads of water!

[K9Lover]

Again

Hi Not Tonight! Thanks for your response. I actually just got back from the doctor because my boss freaked out and thought I had pink eye so she kinda forced me to go Turns out it's a small scratch that the doctor can't even really see (the Doc is just assuming so since nothing else looks wrong), and they told me to come back Friday if it's not better. It actually feels worse now that it's been poked and prodded, but it will go away.

I'm actually feeling physically and mentally better right now, after last night's episode. I just know I'm sick to death of this see-saw of drinking/no drinking, feeling bad...etc. I'll be stopping by the pharmacy tonight to pick up my Antabuse, and my new antibiotic for my eye. Thank goodness I have insurance right now, even though the rates are DOUBLING in January :upset:

[mollyka]

Again

Good to see you taking back control K9. What's the insurance for?
I know you know all this - but sometimes we need to be told! Be double vigilant and determined tonight, you know the booze in your system can weaken your resolve - that's all it is, trying to cheat you. Battle your way one way or the other thro the next couple of days and honest - it'll be as if it never happened. Thinking of you
Molly

[Finding myself]

Again

Way to go K9! Very proud of you! :goodjob: Get some rest and chill out in front of your boob tube and and enjoy yourself some you time! Have a great evening! :l