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    Over it

    I cannot stand hubbies drinking anymore.. He's ballistically drunk tonight, and I've spent the last 5 hours with him not understanding me, groping me, stumbling
    Around, blasting music really loud and being a total pain in the arse.
    He also really thinks that I should deal with this?
    It makes me really really tense.. I asked him tonight what is it in him that can't stand who he is sober?
    I told him I love the sober him, loathe the drunk him, he can't have both.
    15 years of me trying to get him to give up have done nothing, not once in those years hasn't he had a nightly drink.. No wonder I developed a drinking problem.
    He lost his career over this and wonders why??????

    He can move out and get his own place, start dealing with this for a change. I am effing done with it. Once is just too much now.

    #2
    Over it

    Day I had the same problem with my ex. Always pulled up after work with 2 long neck beers and then proceeded to smoke weed and drink and i had 4 young children. I still remember the day where i thought to myself "if i cant beat him join him". So i did, not to his extent but gradually al took over my life. He was a happy drunk then gradually become angry and he abused me a few times which in the morning he always said "i pushed him to it". I dont think walking away was pushing him but we know what a drunks logic is like.

    At the end of the day the children were old enough to cope and I had had enough so i left. He then said he would change but I could take no more. At least i was a functioning alcoholic. He is still drinking and smoking weed 7 years later and is with my ex best friend. She does not cope with his behaviour either but as i think she made her bed so she can lay with it.

    I got to a stage where it was hard enough looking after me without looking after him. Our sobriety is the main issue. I cant tell you what to do as no one could tell me. When I did eventually leave I was the worst in the world, not him. If they only knew.

    Good luck Day and I hope it all works out for you.
    AF free 1st December 2013 - 1st December 2022 - 9 years of freedom

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      #3
      Over it

      Sounds to me like you've had enough and have made a decision. Do what you need to do.
      I used the Sinclair Method to beat my alcoholic drinking.

      Drank within safe limits for almost 2 years

      AF date 22/07/13

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        #4
        Over it

        He needs to get himself together and you or no one else can do it for him. You've had enough, and it's time to move on. There comes a time where they either get help or get out. It's affecting you and family, so it's time. Can you get some counseling? See someone? For yourself.
        Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

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          #5
          Over it

          I completely support and understand your choice to leave.
          If the roles were reversed, would he put up with it?? My husband wouldn't....
          I love my family more than alcohol.:h
          Live in the Solution....not the problem

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