15 months ....but...

[retteacher]

15 months ....but...

Heavenly:

I haven't got nearly as much AF time as you have, but the only thing I wanted to add is that I know I would never have only 1 or 2. That just isn't possible for me. I absolutely must honor my AF committment, because any AL in my system would likely lead to a binge.

Also, I do think that (as Beck said) it takes a lot for a long-time abstainer to express his/her struggles. However, that's why MWO is here. We have to be up-front w/how we're feeling or this program won't work.

Good luck.

Mary

[Yosemite Sam]

15 months ....but...

Yo, All:

I have noticed the same effect, when i quit smoking in 98...
Intermittantly, the attraction for [ fill in the blank ] will come back
to visit you.

My expirence is that it gets easier to deny it, every time that you do.
So notice the attraction and say no again, it will pass in a short time.
I am also reminded of the "madness" of using [ blank ] and the level of
pain using and quiting caused me, and since I don't want to throw
this away and start over, I choose No to these testing thoughts from the past.

With regards to the slip-ups, My view on these is that they can be an
indication, that one may not have everything in place, yet. I view
them as educational opportunities to reach my goals, a chance to honstly
look at where i am and add to my "tool box". I do not view tham as a mistake.
The only mistake is alowing a slip-up to keep you down. Acknowledge it,
take a good look at your standing with your self, check the condition of
your tools in your self help tool box, Stand up and move forward.

The past is the irreversable thread to where one is,
the future is changable not yet here,
All one has is his self, His connection to his higher self,
and the here and now.

I am 2 days away from my 5 months AF.
10 years from tobacco use.
34 years from recreational drugs use [ with a slip up 3 years ago ]
and gratefully recovering from a childhood of sexual abuse.

With love, health and healing to all, Sam

[Guest]

15 months ....but...

Heavenly,
I suppose at any stage we are at risk of deluding ourselves that we either werent too bad, or we have changed.. our ability to delude ourselves is monumental (well, mine is).

What I have found is that I have found a streak of honesty that i hang onto like grim death.. its a spot of honesty in which I know that the risk of just one drink is a risk not worth taking.

I'm not saying that what is for me is for everyone, but I am saying that when we are honest with ourselves, we know what to do.

Good luck.