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Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

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    #61
    Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

    Hi all,
    Vera-B, I wanted to respond to you first. I rarely respond to your posts because I think you post later in the evening, and I post late afternoon or early evening. By the time I post, yours is buried under many others. I feel we are kindred spirits in several ways: around the same age, both involved in church, and I think we are both on the more moderate end of the continuum of moderators. Does that make sense, without sounding judgemental? Hope so. I wrote down the book you recommended, but I can't believe the size already of my winter reading pile. Plus I'm thinking about doing both quilting and knitting this winter. Knitting projects don't take too long if you use big needles, but I don't expect I would also finish a quilt. I think it will be crazy-quilt style.

    AskForHelp, you commented on the tension between abstainers and moderators here. I agree with you, but I think it is bigger than those two "sides". This is My Way Out, and the structure lends itself to many choices. Almost by definition we value the choices we make for ourselves most highly, and the choices of others may seem to have less value. That kind of thinking leads to the "I'm right and you are wrong" assumption, and the battle begins. The answer is respect for the choices of others, but people often aren't very good at that. I have felt that kind of judgement against me in occasional posts, because MY way out does not include meds or supplements.

    Zed, I relish every word you write, but often don't know where I would even begin to comment. Thanks for sharing here your thoughts, feeling, and culture.

    Vlad, I believe from past posts you are at least happy that you are drinking way less than in the past. So congrats on another AF day, and remember to always look forward. If you have a goal we can help you achieve, let us know.

    I have a much more specific gratitude for today, and that is the practice of nasal irrigation. I can already hear someone saying, "Ewww!" But I used to get sinus infections every winter and this practice, using a neti pot, absolutely prevents them. I believe it also shortens the duration of my colds, and prevents my immune system from becoming run down, so I don't pick up so many colds. I work with kids, and the germs are abundant. I will post more details under holistic health. I believe this practice comes to us as a Yoga tradition. Zed and Peri, is that true? You guys are the experts in that area.

    Take care all, and be well.
    My life is better without alcohol, since 9/1/12. My sobriety tool is the list at permalink 236 on the toolbox thread under monthly abstinance.

    Comment


      #62
      Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

      Evening Guys,
      Well! I can happily say that today was a fantastic day! Well, maybe that's stretchin' it just a little. But it was really good. I felt calm and confident. Last night before I went to bed, I decided what I needed to do differently today, react differently to some students, and I took GABA and True Calm. I probably overdosed on the supps. (just kidding - I read the directions because I'm OCD, remember!) but I needed to stay calm, and I'm quite the A type personality. It's very difficult for me to relax and take things as they come.

      Zed, Deebs - thanks for your encouraging words and support. Ya know, that meant so much to me and I can only hope I can be as helpful to you and everyone here.

      Zed, I'm quite fascinated by your posts and always think, WOW! What a brilliant freakin' man! Then I thought of this question for you, the international man: How many languages do you speak? What do you speak most often - oh, that's probably a stupid question, but I'm asking anyhow. I'd love to see India and other parts of the world too. I think I'd first like to see the states. Never went west, except to Arizona one time - a beautiful state. And I think of you too, Deebs, all the way down in South Africa - I was looking at the world map again today. At the time, I noticed that you had just gotten up because your rise and shine time is 5 a.m. (me too). And I think Zed was well into his day. What's the weather like there?

      Peri - I thought about the same thing this morning. After having a horrendous day as we both did yesterday, I did not wake up with a hangover! I was jamming to my tunes at 6:15 a.m. and feeling great and proud that I didn't deal with it using drink.

      And BTW, Vlad, my drink of choice (I should say poison) was vodka. Loved to drink dirty martini's. My mouth still waters when I see someone drinking one. But that's one thing on my list of rules. No hard liquor. I loved holding martini glasses. Maybe I can just pour beer in one!

      Vera - Was the woman who wrote "Stroke of Insight" on Oprah? I saw a little of that episode. Very inspiring.

      And Deebs - yes, Odoul's is a great drink to have in your refrigerator. Do they have any AF beer where you are?

      Eve, we are twins, because technology and I just don't get along too well. Sorry sister!

      Everyone else - Lila, Starting, jeez! everyone, have a great night and day tomorrow.
      Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

      Comment


        #63
        Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

        Happy Wednesday squaddies,

        Yes, Sun, I'm on late. I usually have a long day, and make sure I have all my "must do's" done before I sit down with my laptop and come here. Thanks for responding - I do think we're kindred souls. Just don't always have as much time to spend here as I'd like.

        Miss Deebs, I'll set a place at the Thanksgiving table for you. I'm always pushing for more vegetables at the meal (my favorite), so will make the pitch again this year.

        And J-vo, yes, Dr. Bolte-Taylor was on Oprah. That's when I first saw the book and I've been fascinated ever since. The brain is an amazing thing. As a moderate drinker, anything that discusses the brain and/or brain chemistry I find fascinating. It's a very good read.

        To the young'en Zed, Miss Lila, Vlad, Starts, Mr. Boss, Peri, Gyco, and all the Mod Squad, goodnight. Must get my beauty sleep!!!

        Vera-b

        Comment


          #64
          Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

          Well done Vladster -- keep plugging away and notching up those AF days/nights

          Zed, I nearly wet myself laughing when I read "Cold as frozen dog's meat here in Beijing" LOL certainly gives me the picture. I can't comprehend weather that cold. Winter here the temp drops to maybe 15 C on a really cold day and we all snuggle up with heaters and fires going like a bunch of wusses!!
          I must find that website on numerology ( I did save it in my favorites) and post it here for you to have a look at -- I would love some opinions.

          I think that's an interesting idea you posed about us changing our drink. I have always only drunk wine (unless I am already blotto and the wine has run out which case I'll drink anything)... the one thing I was thinking was what about making our own drinks/juices. I made a jug of lemonade a little while ago and it was lovely -- really hit the spot when I was craving something different to drink.
          There are some great recipes out there and I'd like to try some of them during the festive season.... kinda like the mojito without the mojito lol!

          Lila, I'm sorry to hear your daughter is sick -- nothing serious I hope. Check in when you can, I'm thinking of you.)

          J-Vo, I was going to say no thanks required but after some thought I realised that yes, we (I) do need to say thank you more often. I know what a wonderful feeling it is when someone thanks me for something small I have done for them (like you have) but for some reason I am not a gracious person when it comes to giving or recieving compliments in "real" life.
          That is just another of the reasons why this site has been so good to and for me -- to learn how to say thank you -- thank you to all of you for being YOU!!

          Today the weather is iffy. Woke up to a magnificient sunny morning so I put on my purple baby doll dress (don't laugh) and now the sun has dissappeared - for good and I'm freezing my be-hind off.

          I have only managed to find ONE AF beer here - can you believe it and it's only available at the bottle store WTF. And hellishly expensive but worth it as a treat. I love to add about a quater of a glass of lemonade to it and make a shandy.

          Vera, how crazy is our time difference, your last post (wed) is actually my Thursday 5am.

          Where is everyone else?? Gyco, St John, Ask, Boss, Starts (I know you aren't a modder but we love hearing from you.

          Today I am grateful for having a wonderful husband whom after 14 years of marriage I love more today than the day we met. He is my rock, my anchor and my best friend. We are going to have dinner together tonight - just the two of us - and I'm so looking forward to it.... Oh and he's sexy lol!
          "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

          Comment


            #65
            Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

            Here I am!!!!
            What a great post Deebs! Sounds like your chat with hubs worked a treat??? So glad for you...

            I am doing great at the moment, things have started to make sense for me and I feel rather happy and contended too!

            I love popping in here for a nose so even if I dont say anything I know exactly what you are all up to :-)

            Have a great day all of you.

            xxx
            Living now and not just existing since 9th July 2008
            Nicotine Free since 6th February 2009

            Comment


              #66
              Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

              Ha ha well put Starts!!
              Yip your advice has worked a treat -- thank you for being there for me!
              "The person who says it cannot be done should not interrupt the person doing it"

              Comment


                #67
                Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                hi all
                thanks Deebs, no she wasn't really sick, later on I could see she should've gone to school. Hi Starts, glad you are doing well!
                Sunbeam, yes i have heard of nasal irrigation. I heard it was for meditation so you could breathe unobstructed. I seem to have some kind of allergy or something going on, maybe I should do that. I saw your thread in Holistic. Esp. with cold season coming up would be good to try.
                hi Vera, how are you?
                J-vo, glad you are feeling better, it is okay to be crabby here,actually it is kind of good because it is honest.
                Peri, yes, I like to pay attention to dreams, too. I woke up from a very nice dream this morning, don't know if it was prophetic, if so that is good. I think if you pay attention, more is shown to you. Also, I heard that many people don't understand that their house, unfortunately is worth less than they would like it to be. Do you think Feng Shui helps?
                Hi Zed, how is the smog? Is it getting any better? Hope so! Hi Vlad!
                Holidays are coming up - that means dealing with family. Good and bad, sometimes.
                I am going to go do stuff I have to do, Happy Thursday, Modders - I will check back later!
                Lila

                Comment


                  #68
                  Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                  Friends,

                  so many little, amazing things happen to me every day and there are so many little things that I observe (on a good day) and I like to come here after a long day and share some bits with you all. It's late, today was a LONG day, but a good one, so I'll begin where I left off last night.

                  The glass of wine became two (surprise), and that became... a third. Each glass was 'more generously poured' than the one before, so the 3 glasses weren't 3 glasses really. I looked at the bottle again now and it was 3/4ths done. Btw I don't use wine glasses (lost my set when I moved house earlier this year and didn't bother with buying a new one). Have some Chinese tea cups which work well, so that's what I've been using for the vino.

                  Anyway, the pours were generous and long story short, I slept an idiot's sleep last night and woke up this morning parched and with a headache, feeling considerably stupider. The wine wasn't the best (red, cheap bottle) but what really struck home this morning were these three things (1) I didn't even need a drink last night but after 3 days AF thought I would treat myself and also after a long conversation with my better half as we talked finances and our plan to move... to be with each other next year.. all a bit complicated and somewhat intense needless to say, but in a good way, but ANYHOW. The point is the old brain used that as an excuse to send the old body down to the old wine store to pick up a not-so-old bottle and the result was an awful headache this morning. (2) after 3 days AF and the past 3 weeks Modding with severely reduced intake levels of AL (last month I must have crossed a thousand units... and the month before that I did 45 bottles of wine!), the feeling of a hangover, even a slight one, was unacceptable. No other way to put it. NOT COOL. NOT HAPPENING. (3) Sleep was distorted and not peaceful and I woke up feeling unrested. This brought me back to what some of you guys were says some days ago about this same issue. Now I understand.

                  I have been modding the last 3 weeks. Did a bottle of wine a couple of weeks ago. Also a few glasses here and there in between as my Drink Tracker will show. Generally my pattern has been 3 days AF followed by a night of modding. Then another 3-4 day span at AF. I can't remember feeling so bad though the previous times. This morning was different. Maybe my body and brain is now getting used to AF more often that AL... and it's kind of revolting at what used to be more 'normal' for my system.

                  So anyway. I felt like crap for half the day but I am looking at it positively since I know that I am going to be extra vigilant with myself in the future. It's simple at the end of the day - I DON'T WANT TO FEEL LIKE THAT. I felt stupid, after feeling good, whole, clear and energized for the past few days. I am getting used to sobriety and the feeling that comes with it, and the energy that comes with it, and the sleep cycle.. and I want more of it.

                  Ok. moving on. Today was a BEAUTIFUL day here. Almost like a Spring day. So as bad as yesterday was with the numbing 'cold of frozen dog's meat' climate, today was lovely and warm and sunny with a blue sky and a light breeze.

                  A friend's birthday, so I played hookie from work this afternoon and went to have lunch with her. She was alone on her birthday. That is not allowed. She did not want to be alone, so I spent the afternoon with her. We met at the Bell Tower in Old Beijing where I used to live (and where she lives) and we then walked over to Hou Hai (a huge lake in the center of Beijing) where we ate Yunan food (a province of China bordering Vietnam in the far south - a very spectacularly beautiful place. Heard of Shangri-la, right? In modern language it's come to signify a heavenly sort of setting/ place. Well, Shangri-la IS an actual place in Yunan! The term was taken from that place.) Anyway Yunan food is great, lots of flavours and spices and they do a heck of a job making cheeses down there and they know how to cook up a feast. So lunch was great. We were joined by the restaurant's cat (in the 3rd chair at our table) who slept through our lunch, but it was nice to have her keep us company while we ate!

                  We then went for a long walk through Beihai Park nearby (which used to be the imperial palace gardens of the old Emperors of China like the Ming Dynasty emperors). Bei Hai means "North Lake" as it's situated just north of the Forbidden City (the Imperial Palace complex). Bei Jing by the way, means "North City". Nanjing in the south of China means "South City". Nan is south. Bei is north. That's your Chinese lesson for the day guys Next week I'll explain what East and West are. :H

                  Close to Beihai are the old neighbourhoods, these narrow alleyways into which cars cannot go... so tranquil and beautiful. Little courtyard houses, old ladies sitting outside sunning themselves and dozing off... old men with their bird cages, feeding their song birds, people doing daily chores like cleaning and cooking.. kids playing in the street, babies toddling about with big red cheeks... it was a Special day. And SO beautiful. I came across two kittens in one of the alleyways, both fully black with yellow eyes. They were exact twins. They crouched and looked at me and my friend for a while and we looked at them. And then, a third kitten shows up a sits in between them... same size... but fully white with blue eyes. What a sight! Amazing.

                  Languages - let's see, I have to think about that. Well, English is the one I use the most and is in many ways my mother tongue. My parents are from two different parts of India, so they spoke English to each other (most urban educated Indians do... to varying degrees, but a lot more than most foreigners would expect.) Remember, English IS an Indian language. We have made it our own. English, along with Hindi, is India's officlal national language. We have 22 recognized languages in India (each with its own script and grammar and literature), some say there are as many as 35 distinct languages. Not dialects, mind you. Languages... So I speak English, Hindi, Konkani (regional language on the west coast of India where my mother is from) and Urdu (north Indian language where my father is from). I can read and understand Marathi (regional language of the community in the past of India that I grew up) and I can speak a bit of Tamil (south Indian language.) I studied French for 5 years but unfortunately I can't say I can speak French since I was lazy and didn't pay as much attention as I should have. But I can read quite bit and understand some. I spent some time in the Middle East also but didn't pick up Arabic unfortunately. But I have a wee smattering! Can order food and get around in Cairo!! So that's okay. Should have learnt more though - regret not having done that. My Mandarin Chinese is coming along. A bit better than my Arabic already. Need to keep working at it. Why not?

                  Think that's it. Not so much. No Afrikaans or Swahili in my portfolio, alas!

                  Today on my walk I bought a Chairman Mao watch. It's like the Donald Duck watches you might have seen? With Donald Duck in the center and Duck hands... but this has Mao in the center and he's waving away as the seconds tick. Had a great laugh! Needless to say I didn't invest a whole lot of money in it. Ha ha ha.

                  Ok folks, I'm done. Long day, burnt out. Looking forward to sleeping AF tonight. I miss the clear night's sleep and that feeling of clearness waking up! Starting to get used to that!! Very, very, very happy to be able to report that.

                  Jvo, I'm glad I was of help. No need for thanks, but your more than welcome. Peri, I'd love for you to come to India some day. I'll let you know more about the Yoga Retreat that I am planning to go on next month. It's very interesting and there is some info on the net. One doesn't have to come all the way to India to explore the practice. It's Breathing, that's all it is. Being mindful of one's breath.

                  Sun, you sound incredibly strong, I can feel your power and strength in your words. I take inspiration from it. Your mind is clear and it's inspiration to me (us). Regarding the nasal irrigation, yes, that is a Yogic technique. I remember as a child playing in my grandmother's house where I spent a lot of time running around and playing.. and my Uncle who was a big Yoga master (still is) doing that. He used to take that knot through. Bowl of water. Yowzer.

                  One of my fav Yoga exercises is the Dead-man posture. Guys you should try it. Just lay down on a hard surface, like the floor or on a mattress, and let the pressure/ stress out of each part of your body, part by part. Start at the top and work down or the other way around. Let gravity take over. It's a great stress-reliever. Takes a few minutes, perfect before bed. And helps with sleep.

                  Gnite all.

                  PS. SORRY FOR THE LONG POST.

                  Comment


                    #69
                    Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                    don't be sorry Boxer Boy! Thanks for your honesty. I am impressed with all your languages. Here in the US, you know, most of us just speak one language. You know, I just realized with this being such an international website, it is only for English speakers. I was wondering why so few people from France (I remember like one!) and Spain, etc are on the forum. Duh!

                    Comment


                      #70
                      Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                      Hi mod squad, I'm getting on a little late this morning.

                      It's 20* here this morning, burrr. So, like I said, the weather changes here quickly this time of year. And I have several field appointments today. I'll just bundle up and deal with it. Goes with the job.

                      I thought zed asked an interesting question a couple days ago that we should all give some thought to and hopefully give some answers to. I'm paraphrasing, but we tend to talk about what moderate drinking isn't. So what is it? So far I've been doing what it isn't. I went through my 30 days AF. For me to drink on Day 31, clearly a crappy day for me, would have been to break one of my mod rules (honestly thought about it though). Yesterday, Day 32 we had an HOA meeting at 7pm that dragged on and we didn't get home until almost 10. It would not have been appropriate to drink before the meeting and didn't even think about it afterward. I don't want to sound like I'm planning anything out here, with those situations I didn't plan, I'm just reporting. I'm just trying to answer the question. I'm really new at this.

                      Then again, maybe some of it is planning. Looking ahead, we are going to my parents on Sunday for brats and beer. Life does require planning doesn't it? I do not eat beef or pork - it's a dietary thing for me. Dear mom and dad never seem to remember my dietary needs so I have already planned to pick up a pack of turkey brats to bring along to throw on the grill for me. I also have set as one of my mod rules that in family situations I will limit myself to 1 AL drink with dinner. So, if I want more than 1 beer I will need to plan ahead and bring some AF beer too.

                      Seems like if I plan ahead like this to have 1 AL beverage on Sunday that I can then plan to make Saturday AF. Hubby and I often go out to eat on Friday night. So that can be left open to maybe have 1 or 2 glasses of wine with dinner.

                      I don't want to come across like I will plan each and every week out like this. I believe that most of the time I am much more spontanious. Like I said, zed asked a question that I am also curious about. We are both new at this. I could come up with other scenarios too. For example I could say I am going to choose to only have AF beer on Sunday... I'm just laying out a "for example". And I'm looking to you more experienced moderators for input. Would this look like a reasonable mod week? Do you plan ahead when you know that you have an event coming up such as brats and beer at mom and dad's? I think about my grandson's recent birthday. I knew I would have birthday cake at his party. I recall thinking about that for several days prior and saying no to high calorie goodies a few days leading up to, and for a few days after to compensate for the extra calories. Is it the same kind of thing with AL (with much more serious consequences of course)?

                      I appreciate the input of all my cyber friends here.

                      Have a happy Thursday everyone!

                      periwinkle
                      Even baby mountain goats must learn to tackle the smallest mountains first. sigpic

                      Comment


                        #71
                        Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                        Hi Peri,
                        Thanks so much for your moderate question - I've been thinking about that a lot too. My goal is to be an occasional social drinker, so what does that mean for me? Just having a drink or two on a special occasion, but what is a special occasion? And what about an occasional glass of wine with a nice meal? For me, much of it comes back to frequency, but I like to think broadly on that. I have had only 1.5 glasses of wine this month so far. I am thinking of having wine with a nice dinner following my choral performance this Sunday. Does that rule out wine with the Thanksgiving meal for me? No, because I have had so little to drink this month that the big picture is still fine. I am sure the world will not end if I have some wine twice in a week. I just don't want that to be the routine. And maybe I will share sparkling water with my sister on Thanksgiving, who doesn't drink. I love having this choice in front of me. I think I do need to plan any drinks. The key for me is discriminating a real occasion, not drinking just because it is the weekend. I remember you asked about that one glass of wine at my husband's retirement, which turned into three glasses. My DRINK light, which is how I describe a strong urge, was definitely on that day. My DRINK light was definitely on again a week or so later when I invited a friend over to share a bottle of wine, then drank 2/3 of it before she arrived. My 2.5 months AF simply did not teach me how to moderate. I have only learned this skill through trial and error.

                        Zed, I'm not sure what you were talking about with your grandfather and a knot. My nasal irrigation involves only water with a little kosher salt, and a small teapot device.

                        Gotta go. "The Chef" (my husband) tells me dinner is ready. Not only does he cook, but he brings home all the groceries. That is another gratitude in my life. I write down groceries, and the items come home.
                        My life is better without alcohol, since 9/1/12. My sobriety tool is the list at permalink 236 on the toolbox thread under monthly abstinance.

                        Comment


                          #72
                          Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                          What's up Modders?
                          I like to break it down, so here goes!

                          Deebs - hope your dinner with hubby is enjoyable, and from the sounds of your relationship, I know it will. It's not everyday you hear spouses talking so highly of each other like you did. And to boot, after 14 years! Awesome.

                          Starting, I'm glad you're doing so well. It feels great to be living like we are now.

                          Lila - Was it you who mentioned about the lightbox? With the drastic weather changes, it makes my anxiety and depression soar. It's such a difficult time for me. Am I right that you're in the upper mid west? How's weather there now?

                          Zed - Don't let the three glasses of wine get you down. You're already on the road to being and feeling so much better. It sucks feeling even a slight hangover after feeling so great, I know that. And yes, it seems as even though my tolerance is lower and I've drunk so much less, I still feel the effects the following morning and don't like it one bit. Thanks for explaining the languages to me. I did not know any of that, and as with learning so much from you, I was amazed at what you said regarding how many languages are spoken in India. I do not know what you meant by the "restaurant cat."

                          Peri, I'm still working out the kinks in my modding plan. I've not been doing it long, but what I can tell you is that I'm a person that plans every detail of my life! I'm just that way and I don't think I can change or even want to. It makes me comfortable to know what I will be doing and to have a plan in place; hence, my livlihood of teaching. Before going AF, though, for those months that I did, I didn't have a plan and was a freakin' wreck because I didn't even care about getting things done. I feel like I've gotten that back and control of my life. So planning is what I do at work and at home, and I can say that you get results from it. Yes, we're going to make mistakes, but that's when we need to readjust our plans, make modifications, so the results are more desirable.

                          Sunbeam, you're right also about being AF and that not being any teaching tool for moderation. I did the same thing, and I was pretty scared when I started my modding plan because I didn't need to think about upcoming events, how much, where, when . . . We are living and learning from each other. Thanks all! BTW, my husband loves to cook, does all the cooking and the grocery shopping. He actually doesn't like me to do the shopping, because I don't do it carefully enough and use the proper coupons or look for the sales in the newspaper. (This is one area where I'm NOT a good planner and never have been). He cooks all day just about every Sunday so we have good food to eat throughout the week. Yes, I'm blessed.

                          Have a great night!
                          Sometimes what you're most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.

                          Comment


                            #73
                            Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                            Happy Thursday squaddies,

                            Just a quick note to let you know that you are in my thoughts; better late than never!! Yes, you all know my secret now. I lurk in the late night, just reading and posting, reading and posting. At least I have good cell coverage. Things could be worse. Must get ready for the weekend. 2 girls coming. Oh my ! Where is that mantra when I heed one?!? It's Vera's bedtime, so will sign off. Getting a haircut(and color) tomorrow, so the next time I sign on you'll see I'm totally glam.

                            Vera-b

                            Comment


                              #74
                              Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                              Hi Mod Squad,
                              Great name for a great thread. I've gotten so much from reading all your posts, and recognize myself in so many of them. I've introduced myself elsewhere, but had a little trouble figuring out where I belong.

                              Like so many of you, I have come to really cherish my AF days, and the mornings that follow them. I feel like I am grabbing much better control of my life, from parenting, to housework, to office work, to exercise and diet. I wish it were always a straight and steady path, but of course it's not. Still, I think I'm heading in the right direction. I had three AF days, and then tonight I had two drinks. It was a violation of my "rules" , since my husband wasn't home from work yet...(it's a long day with three kids when he doesn't get home until 8 pm). Furthermore, my vague plan was "only red wine" since that's always been something I can drink slowly, with pretty predictable results. With no wine in the house tonight, I made a Manhattan, and then a second. The one rule I didn't violate was the "never when I'm in a really bad mood" rule. I felt like having it as a treat, and yes to unwind a little. But not out of despair or real tension.

                              Anyway, I'm committed to getting this right, and I'm excited at the prospect of getting help from you guys, and being part of the community...So thanks for being here. Now off to sleep, I hope.
                              "When she enjoyed her drinking she couldn't control it, and when she controlled it, she couldn't enjoy it." (from The Big Book)

                              Comment


                                #75
                                Mod Squad Weekly Thread 17th Nov

                                Welcome Getting Better,
                                I've been having a real struggle with what my rules are and the last couple of weeks I was having a real hard time following my rules. I got advice to go AF for as long as possible and although I tend to only go 5-6 days AF at a time it has helped me to understand and appreciate how nice it feels to not have the hangover and all of the other negative things that go with that.

                                When I drink I also pay very close attention to how I feel the next day and I actually have discovered with even 1 drink I just don't bounce out of bed the next day energetic like I am on AF days. I have to admit that I DO enjoy a nice cold beer on a week-end day after being outside or a great glass of wine or two on a date evening with hubby. I am hoping I can mod and it can be o.k. but it scared me when I started to see 4 drinks on the drinktracker because I started one night and didn't want to stop.

                                I also broke my rules of not drinking alone in order to do that so I was pretty disappointed in myself.

                                There is a ton of support here so join us and make your way with us as we figure out ours.
                                Big welcome hugs to you,
                                Eve11
                                "Control your destiny or somebody else will"

                                ~Jack Welsh~:h

                                God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. ~Author unknown, :thumbs:

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